So on top of everything, I’m probably gay

[aneurysm]

I'm Muslim living in a Muslim country and everyday, I question my sexuality. I have a feeling that I might be bisexual...

(In fact, I'm sure of it lmao, who am I kidding).

someone please shoot me already. I beg you.

please do something, anything. I'm literally agonizing before your eyes.

MAKE IT STOP

 

[Amumu]

If it's illegal where you live, I think it would be more appropriate to be careful. Have you ever been with a girlfriend?

 

[EdibleGasMask]

I don't know what its like to be in a country with sharia law or the dominant religion being Islam but, don't they just outright punish lgbt people to death? Government assisted suicide, huh.

 

[aneurysm]

but don't they just outright punish lgbt people to death. Government assisted suicide, huh.

we might be onto something. unfortunately, my country don't have Sharia law

If it's illegal where you live, I think it would be more appropriate to be careful. Have you ever been with a girlfriend?

no, not really. tbh, I don't really care that it's illegal (I can just leave the country)

I just feel like something is wrong with me for it. I feel like I'm filthy, perverted... there is this sense of disgust.

I still haven't explored this side of myself (the gay side), I just intuitively know that the more I find out, the more this looming sense of self-disgust will grow. It's terrifying.

 

[Tackingintothewind]

If that's the case you can seek asylum

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

Convert the fitlhy homophonic countries to the glory of catboys. Then, once they're all gay, they'll only have the options of giving up their dumb homophobic bullshit beliefs, or stone themselves to death.

 

[aneurysm]

Convert the fitlhy homophonic countries to the glory of catboys. Then, once they're all gay, they'll only have the options of giving up their dumb homophobic bullshit beliefs, or stone themselves to death.

*catgirls

 

[Bootleg Astolfo]

*catgirls

That one's a boy lol, but catgirls fine too uwu ! Here is free catgirl uwu.

 

[aneurysm]

If that's the case you can seek asylum

I actually possess 3 nationalities.
But my this is my home country, it's the only place I can be without working (because my family lives here)

If I leave, I'll have to work full time (which is also terrifying)

That one's a boy lol,

I know but I'm a girl too so I'd convert the country to the glory of catgirls

 

[Tackingintothewind]

I actually possess 3 nationalities.
But my this is my home country, it's the only place I can be without working (because my family lives here)

If I leave, I'll have to work full time (which is also terrifying)

Do you have passports for the other countries?

 

[aneurysm]

Do you have passports for the other countries?

no, all expired. but like I said earlier, my problem isn't being in this country.

my main issue is the self-disgust, it's the terrifying part

 

[Tackingintothewind]

That I can relate to. I'm asexual, I always wandered what was wrong with me

 

[EdibleGasMask]

I just feel like something is wrong with me for it. I feel like I'm filthy, perverted... there is this sense of disgust.

I still haven't explored this side of myself (the gay side), I just intuitively know that the more I find out, the more this looming sense of self-disgust will grow. It's terrifying.

I'm not going to deny that people do feel like either they shouldn't be gay or wish they weren't. I wish I wasn't but I think you are misconstruing what being gay does to you. Ultimately nothing, but its really the stigmatisms around lgbt people. To be honest I consider you lucky, If I was Bi and I knew it I'd just date women. If you don't want to date women or "explore that part of yourself" don't, nobody is forcing you and maybe when time passes you can forget that part of yourself because it becomes irrelevant.
Oh also there are a lot of reports that straight women have same sex attraction while being completely straight maybe that's something to look into?

 

[aneurysm]

nobody is forcing you and maybe forget that part of yourself because it becomes irrelevant.

I just feel like the only form of healthy romantic relationship I could have would be with a woman. I don't feel like I can have a truly healthy romance with a man (since I'm a bit scared of men) (I know it's weird)

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I just feel like something is wrong with me for it. I feel like I'm filthy, perverted... there is this sense of disgust.

I still haven't explored this side of myself (the gay side), I just intuitively know that the more I find out, the more this looming sense of self-disgust will grow. It's terrifying.

You are not "filthy". There are differing sexual identities within the human species. Just because some of them may not align with the values or principles of a country that you are in - that does not mean that the way you feel is wrong. Not just this, but even if you were "perverted" as you claim about yourself (I am not saying that you are) - so what? Many heterosexuals could be considered perverted, too, given that they constantly brag about their sexual conquests and yet not many seem to have a problem with this, but when a non-heterosexual individual does the same it is suddenly considered deviant. That was an example of a double-standard.

This next part will make an assumption, so please say if this is not true: does the country that you live in prohibit certain sexualities? If yes then that may be why you feel disgust, because you have been conditioned to feel that way by the culture that you are immersed in.

 

[Neowise]

I feel like I'm filthy, perverted... there is this sense of disgust.

I think you are being too harsh with yourself. There is nothing filthy or perverted about being bisexual or homosexual. Homosexuality can even be observed in nature, there is plenty of examples. It's just that religions tell people how to live and who to love, that is why we feel ashamed. But it really isn't that bad if you leave religions aside. What really counts in the end is whether you find the right partner and are happy :)

 

[aneurysm]

You are not "filthy". There are differing sexual identities within the human species. Just because some of them may not align with the values or principles of a country that you are in - that does not mean that the way you feel is wrong. Not just this, but even if you were "perverted" as you claim about yourself (I am not saying that you are) - so what? Many heterosexuals could be considered perverted, too, given that they constantly brag about their sexual conquests and yet not many seem to have a problem with this, but when a non-heterosexual individual does the same it is suddenly considered deviant. That was an example of a double-standard.

This next part will make an assumption, so please say if this is not true: does the country that you live in prohibit certain sexualities? If yes then that may be why you feel disgust, because you have been conditioned to feel that way by the culture that you are immersed in.

I know a thing or two about self-hate. But this is different. The self-disgust feels like it'd burn me alive if it could grow hands.

I know that I'm deeply conditioned, but I'm surprised. I was never bothered at all by gay people, until it happened to me. funny how I only realize I'm homophobic when I'm intimately involved with it
Okay, I think for now the solution for me is Xanax overdosing, and then we'll see.

 

[stevieu]

we might be onto something. unfortunately, my country don't have Sharia law


no, not really. tbh, I don't really care that it's illegal (I can just leave the country)

I just feel like something is wrong with me for it. I feel like I'm filthy, perverted... there is this sense of disgust.

I still haven't explored this side of myself (the gay side), I just intuitively know that the more I find out, the more this looming sense of self-disgust will grow. It's terrifying.

You are most definitely none of those things! Genitals are genitals... If you are attracted to, and connect with someone and likewise, who cares? Why should anyone care? (if only it was that simple of course, but that's my sentiment!)

 

[Worndown]

no, all expired. but like I said earlier, my problem isn't being in this country.

my main issue is the self-disgust, it's the terrifying part

You are who you are. No disgust needed.

I just feel like the only form of healthy romantic relationship I could have would be with a woman. I don't feel like I can have a truly healthy romance with a man (since I'm a bit scared of men) (I know it's weird)

Then you need to find the right woman. You are not the only person facing this situation. Quietly look for others in your area. Hiding with another is better than hiding alone.

 

[Nolen]

It's normal to feel self-disgust. I did too when I hit puppetry and realized that I was gay because that's what we are taught by society, friends or family. Just know there is nothing wrong with you but it's your task to overcome that feeling.

 

[LittleJem]

I am straight, but have been with a few women, one of whom I loved (or was obsessed by). When I was with her, I felt high, so happy and high (and the rest of the time I was chronically depressed as per normal, so I'm not sure how she did that to me!). I do think that homosexuality is part of nature, just like all other sexualities (including aesexuality).

Can you watch movies on the theme? I loved Portrait of a Lady on Fire, very beautifully made and by a lesbian film director, Celine Sciamma.

Animals are homosexual as well as heterosexual, just like humans.

 

[lofticries]

It's pretty normal to be curious. I'm sure most people have questioned their sexuality at least once in their life time. Hell some might have even experimented a lil bit. You might one day experiment with a guy and find out that it's not what you imagined it'd be like . But even if it turns out you do like guys I don't see the problem with it. I mean no doubt it'd be hard to live your best bi life where you're at but i don't see how it'd make you disgusting or perverted. I doubt 100% of the hetero population are living that pure no sex before marriage, no porn, no cheating, no kink life.

 

[BluesRunTheGame]

Could be sexual orientation OCD?

 

[WornOutLife]

What a shame you live in a Muslim country! Being gay or bi is okay!
Move to Argentina! People will receive you with lots of love here lol

 

[ZardozOmega]

Apply for refugee status in Sweden and ravage sweet swedish boipucci
my dream

 

[Mendex]

What a shame you live in a Muslim country! Being gay or bi is okay!
Move to Argentina! People will receive you with lots of love here lol

Argentina is suicide but with extra steps. Good method for sure.

 

[ZardozOmega]

Argentina is suicide but with extra steps. Good method for sure.

how so?

 

[Lmd]

Some answers on this topic are disgusting to read.

Don't be ashamed of who you are, there's nothing wrong to feel this way and you are not a pervert. All of these preconceptions are just stereotypes of people who don't understand how the most basic human interactions work. Don't let them condition you.

 

[CatabolicSeed]

Nothing is wrong with being lgbt, I'm sorry society has made you feel like there is. Being lgbt is wonderful and can lead to so much happiness.

 

[Makko]

Confirmado