So my bus is coming

[Jean Améry]

It's sad to read you plan on leaving, especially given that you have two children who I can imagine must love you very much even if they're being manipulated by their father. I would urge you to consider this very carefully and take all the time you need, for your child's sake who's only 14. Are you absolutely sure he/she'll be ok and it wouldn't be better to wait untill he/she's a little older?

You write you're not important: I beg to differ. You are a human-being and therefore important as there is only one you and there won't be anyone like you ever again. If your husband makes you feel this way you should know his biased, vile opinion does not reflect reality. People like him are scum and shouldn't be allowed to destroy good people like you.

It's up to you but in this case I can't help but be moved by your tragic circumstances and feel obligated to speak my mind. I apologize if this might offend you.

If you do decide to go I hope everything goes well. We are here to listen to you and support you, regardless of your decision.

 

[jgm63]

If you decide to proceed, then I wish you a safe crossing over to a better place

 

[Skyview]

@Mloureiro ; just been reading your posts and I wish I could turn back time so I could get to know you , there is compassion and love in your words to others who were suffering. You put others before yourself even as you yourself struggled with your thoughts , you were still there for everyone else , you are a warm caring remarkable woman .
It is my loss , of not knowing you . Take care Mloureiro

 

[Mloureiro]

It's sad to read you plan on leaving, especially given that you have two children who I can imagine must love you very much even if they're being manipulated by their father. I would urge you to consider this very carefully and take all the time you need, for your child's sake who's only 14. Are you absolutely sure he/she'll be ok and it wouldn't be better to wait untill he/she's a little older?

You write you're not important: I beg to differ. You are a human-being and therefore important as there is only one you and there won't be anyone like you ever again. If your husband makes you feel this way you should know his biased, vile opinion does not reflect reality. People like him are scum and shouldn't be allowed to destroy good people like you.

It's up to you but in this case I can't help but be moved by your tragic circumstances and feel obligated to speak my mind. I apologize if this might offend you.

If you do decide to go I hope everything goes well. We are here to listen to you and support you, regardless of your decision.

It does not offend me at all, my children, my parrots, some disabled, are the ones to keep me here. Even him, because he works for his parents, depends on them, whem he did not get paid I had his back, we live in one of their apartments because he has to be one street across his office, I have a one 1 hour commute to my office and 1,5 back and have everything on my back while he hangs out with his buddies, then come back and go to the office, 44 years old working for daddy but you have to show something. Oh, folks are retired now but still have to receive wages from the company, his mother never done anything besides housework, this is a building company bur whatever. Point is, I agreed to live in the family building temporarily because my husband could not handle the stress of a commute. My inlaws always hated me, do not hide it, mi sisters in law as well. What was temporary became 17 years and counting, every house I tried, had a problem in his opinion. So, his life is his family (parents, sisters, nephews) and his friends. Her sister'husband came on to me in 2010, he lived in the same building, I told him, well, 2 years later when he was caught with someone else, my dear hubby told everyone, everything. And if they did not like me then, imagine after? Maybe she provoked him? Maybe she was after him? Still, I continued to fight for our marriage but I am done... Tired, alone. I have guys after me, I do not want them, I just want to cease to exist. If I think about my kids, os course. But at the least they will be told that I was nothing...

@Mloureiro ; just been reading your posts and I wish I could turn back time so I could get to know you , there is compassion and love in your words to others who were suffering. You put others before yourself even as you yourself struggled with your thoughts , you were still there for everyone else , you are a warm caring remarkable woman .
It is my loss , of not knowing you . Take care Mloureiro

Thank you so much, I always felt I never really contributed to this forum as I am so shy. It is not I don't care, I have seen a name crossed, from my country, my daughter's age, we shared some messages, I told him to hang in there and he didn't. That made me think things over, the effect on my kids, for instance? But they will suffer and be fine

 

[UpandDownPrincess]

You are not nothing.

You are unappreciated and treated badly, but you are not nothing.

You are welcome here for as long as you wish: hours, days, years.

Wishing you light and warmth, forever.

 

[Mloureiro]

You are not nothing.

You are unappreciated and treated badly, but you are not nothing.

You are welcome here for as long as you wish: hours, days, years.

Wishing you light and warmth, forever.

It is being so hard, the only ones, really, getting that I am in real pain ,are my parrots. Especially the disabled one, who has to be prep to sleep as he was a human baby, singing, whatever. His mother ate his feet away, soon after he was born, in the dark, enclosed. So he has many issues aside his disability. I have adopted him, created a special cage for him but unlike the others I tend to leave this one out of the cage with my children because they can handle him, they can not handle the others. Well, his name is Paco, sometimes I call him Velcro because he has to be on me as soon as I get home. Today, they all sensed my mood, very quiet, not chewing anything but this one came on and eye to eye he told me: don't you dare leave because I need you and he was frantic
I know that there are no rescue centers in my country. With my oldest in college no one will take care of him or the others as my "hubby" hates animals, only humans "are creatures og God". I have 20000 on my own to start a new life, but it hurts, 20 years out the back door, start all over again... Just because one Greu parrot looked me in the eye and I understood: "Do not do not do it, please". And now, you all think I am crazy. I am not, sticking to the plan...
It is being so hard, the only ones, really, getting that I am in real pain ,are my parrots. Especially the disabled one, who has to be prep to sleep as he was a human baby, singing, whatever. His mother ate his feet away, soon after he was born, in the dark, enclosed. So he has many issues aside his disability. I have adopted him, created a special cage for him but unlike the others I tend to leave this one out of the cage with my children because they can handle him, they can not handle the others, only I can. Well, his name is Paco, sometimes I call him Velcro because he has to be on me as soon as I get home. Today, they all sensed my mood, very quiet, not chewing anything but this one came on and eye to eye he told me: don't you dare leave because I need you and he was frantic.
I know that there are no rescue centers in my country. With my oldest in college no one will take care of him or the others as my "hubby" hates animals, only humans "are creatures of God". I have 20000 on my own to start a new life, but it hurts, 20 years out the back door, start all over again... Just because one Grey parrot looked me in the eye and I understood: "Do not do not do it, please". And now, you all think I am crazy. I am not, sticking to the plan...

 

[Skyview]

Your Parrot has wisdom , you cannot ignore Paco . Have you considered that this is a message to YOU , that you are needed here on Earth . Leave and find another place to live with your parrots, go to another town so you can be free to spread your wings and be independent,to be carefree, find yourself , the real you and become the strong woman that you are . You can do this !

 

[Epsilon0]

Your love for animals, and for the poor legless Paco speaks volumes about what a kind and gentle soul you are. No, I don't think you are crazy. I think you are a wonderful human being who makes her little corner of the universe a better place.

 

[jgm63]

@Mloureiro You are very beautiful.
Whatever you decide, I wish the very best for you.