So fucking unfair

[LilGhost]

why do I have to fight? Even to fucking die. I tried ctb but t I keep failing. I keep being to weak (physically. I can push through the mental part, I just keep failing despite going through hanging tutorials) to go through all accessible methods. Why can't I just perish? Why the fuck am I so sick. I am in so much pain rn yet still alive. Please. I just want this nightmare to end. I'm begging to die. My head is about to explode. And I am so fucking jealous that when similar shit happens to other people I know, they get helped. They get taken care of. Please. I know no one will save me. All I want is to perish. I am in so much pain it makes me sick yet I can't even take a break. I feel miserable

 

[aspenjrojas]

You could reconsider and/or take a break from attempting even if just for a bit if you feel you keep failing, and rethink all options over. If you do still want to try the same method, you could try recording yourself to see where you go wrong and test it out to see if you pass out properly and your position and all is correct before committing.

 

[brokennsad]

why do I have to fight? Even to fucking die. I tried ctb but t I keep failing. I keep being to weak (physically. I can push through the mental part, I just keep failing despite going through hanging tutorials) to go through all accessible methods. Why can't I just perish? Why the fuck am I so sick. I am in so much pain rn yet still alive. Please. I just want this nightmare to end. I'm begging to die. My head is about to explode. And I am so fucking jealous that when similar shit happens to other people I know, they get helped. They get taken care of. Please. I know no one will save me. All I want is to perish. I am in so much pain it makes me sick yet I can't even take a break. I feel miserable

R u in physical pain from an illness or mental n emotional.
I feel the same in regards to wanting to perish. I want to trade places with everyone who dies!!
The worst is having someone tell you "just be happy" or to quote my mom "at least you had happiness at one time" I'm so jealous that she died recently n it wasnt me. Plz dont anyone say sorry 4 your loss. She got to skip out on this fucking life n im trapped.

I want to order the argon gas i keep talking about, should have done it weeks ago but I keep getting hung up on del date. If my stupid ass brother is over when they del it via fedex, he'll say wth is that? N del is anywhere between 3 to 4 days...so how do i distract him from coming over on the day of del? He works on Friday n sat nights so that's when I would set it up in the bathroom. Feeling fucked!!!
Weird thing is tonight he was talking about welding, which is what argon gas is used for.
He wants to move in soon which will blow up my opportunity