So fucking unfair

[LilGhost]

why do I have to fight? Even to fucking die. I tried ctb but t I keep failing. I keep being to weak (physically. I can push through the mental part, I just keep failing despite going through hanging tutorials) to go through all accessible methods. Why can't I just perish? Why the fuck am I so sick. I am in so much pain rn yet still alive. Please. I just want this nightmare to end. I'm begging to die. My head is about to explode. And I am so fucking jealous that when similar shit happens to other people I know, they get helped. They get taken care of. Please. I know no one will save me. All I want is to perish. I am in so much pain it makes me sick yet I can't even take a break. I feel miserable

 

[aspenjrojas]

You could reconsider and/or take a break from attempting even if just for a bit if you feel you keep failing, and rethink all options over. If you do still want to try the same method, you could try recording yourself to see where you go wrong and test it out to see if you pass out properly and your position and all is correct before committing.