SO ALONE

[StarryStarry]

Well, today is Monday morning. I wish I had died in my sleep. I know I keep writing to say how overwhelmed I am. Not news. I've been alone most of my life, but quite honestly I've never felt so alone as I do now. I'm making a 1500 mile trip and the sad part is nobody will know if I die on the way or not. I know it won't count because I'll be gone, but the thought that no one cares whether I live or die is heartbreaking. I will be very close to where my little girl is buried (9 hours). I feel so close to ctb that I'm thinking seriously about just driving through and sticking with my original plan. Yes, I'll have Sweet Pea with me. Just to lay my head down and closing my eyes and never having to be concerned with the bullshit of life sounds so wonderful. I hope someone here cares enough about an old lady that I can keep in touch with them as I travel. If you don't hear from me - well I guess you'll know something has happened. If not, I understand. I get it. We all have our baggage - I do NOT want to push my baggage on anyone else. Thanks for listening.

 

[Nolan96]

I'm wishing the best for you and Sweet Pea.
I hope the trip goes smoothly, safely, and that life gets more manageable for you where you're starting your new job.

 

[anxious_depressive]

I'm sending you a hug.
You can write to me.))

I hope your trip goes well .

 

[FuneralCry]

I always wish that I died in my sleep, to me it sounds so peaceful to be free from all suffering. I know that loneliness can be painful for many people, I'm sorry you are going through this. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[KimKevorkian]

I know my mother, as she got to an advanced age and saw her body deteriorate and her physical capacities dramatically diminish, felt I was the only reason she had to stick around. She just wanted a peaceful means of leaving her body. Peaceful. No suffering or choking or pain. All I want to do is join her and return to space dust.
She was vital until 91! But the next six years were a bitch for her. There's nothing worse than to see a loved one deteriorate progressively. She had friends, a married couple, who had died and she suspected they did a peaceful suicide together. She was always asking, "I wonder how Dick and Noel did it." That's why we're here, isn't it? At least that's why I'm here. Now that the DeBreather has fallen far short of the mark reportedly, I want to know a surefire means of exiting GRACEFULLY and with DIGNITY. The means and manner of one's departure should, in my estimation, be attended to with the greatest thought. We deserve this. It's such a shame that we have to hide behind aliases on a "controversial" website in order to openly discuss our desires to end the pain and artifice and to share knowledge about achieving those ends in the most dignified, pain-free way possible,

I wish you a nd your companion a peace-filled trip. I feel your heavy heart, truly.

 

[StarryStarry]

I'm sending you a hug.
You can write to me.))

I hope your trip goes well .

I will. Thank you. I'm feeling so vulnerable and alone. I apologize for sounding like a baby.

 

[Looooser]

Well, today is Monday morning. I wish I had died in my sleep. I know I keep writing to say how overwhelmed I am. Not news. I've been alone most of my life, but quite honestly I've never felt so alone as I do now. I'm making a 1500 mile trip and the sad part is nobody will know if I die on the way or not. I know it won't count because I'll be gone, but the thought that no one cares whether I live or die is heartbreaking. I will be very close to where my little girl is buried (9 hours). I feel so close to ctb that I'm thinking seriously about just driving through and sticking with my original plan. Yes, I'll have Sweet Pea with me. Just to lay my head down and closing my eyes and never having to be concerned with the bullshit of life sounds so wonderful. I hope someone here cares enough about an old lady that I can keep in touch with them as I travel. If you don't hear from me - well I guess you'll know something has happened. If not, I understand. I get it. We all have our baggage - I do NOT want to push my baggage on anyone else. Thanks for listening.

I love adventure and would love it if you stayed in touch on your endeavor! I haven't been out of town in years and the thought of being on a virtual adventure sounds nice. Please feel free to pm me.

 

[freedompass]

Hey there Starry, from one 'old' lady to another Feel free to pm me at any time.

 

[S like Siren]

I care about you,fabulous woman!!<3

 

[LADY007]

Well, today is Monday morning. I wish I had died in my sleep. I know I keep writing to say how overwhelmed I am. Not news. I've been alone most of my life, but quite honestly I've never felt so alone as I do now. I'm making a 1500 mile trip and the sad part is nobody will know if I die on the way or not. I know it won't count because I'll be gone, but the thought that no one cares whether I live or die is heartbreaking. I will be very close to where my little girl is buried (9 hours). I feel so close to ctb that I'm thinking seriously about just driving through and sticking with my original plan. Yes, I'll have Sweet Pea with me. Just to lay my head down and closing my eyes and never having to be concerned with the bullshit of life sounds so wonderful. I hope someone here cares enough about an old lady that I can keep in touch with them as I travel. If you don't hear from me - well I guess you'll know something has happened. If not, I understand. I get it. We all have our baggage - I do NOT want to push my baggage on anyone else. Thanks for listening.

I care about you, too !! I cannot do much to help you......but never think no one cares !! Most of the people here do !!

 

[StarryStarry]

I care about you, too !! I cannot do much to help you......but never think no one cares !! Most of the people here do !!

Thank you. Loneliness is a terrible feeling.

 

[LADY007]

Thank you. Loneliness is a terrible feeling.

Yes it is... and as you know it is not that easy to find friends who don't cause trouble. I have seen so many arguments in the comments on the internet (which are minor and ridiculous) that I feel like asking any new friend if they enjoy causing trouble or want peace. If they do not want peace..I don't want them.

 

[StarryStarry]

Yes it is... and as you know it is not that easy to find friends who don't cause trouble. I have seen so many arguments in the comments on the internet (which are minor and ridiculous) that I feel like asking any new friend if they enjoy causing trouble or want peace. If they do not want peace..I don't want them.

I agree. I've had enough drama in my life. I want peace - just peace. But I must admit it would be nice to have a friend to have coffee with or go to a movie with - someone who doesn't make me feel inferior because I get depressed.

 

[katagiri83]

Safe travel for your journey, I'll watch this thread & inbox is always open as well.

The idea of going on a long trip for relocation must be daunting, wish you'll have some reprieve from the stress & fear once you're on the road.

Take care .

 

[OlderNotWiser]

I care. I can relate to so much of what you've written, and I would be honored to be in contact with you. I really hate when I hear the phrase 'you're not alone" because it rarely proves to be true. I've learned to be reluctant to reach out to people because they always desert you in the end which is kind of ironic considering where we are. Anyway, I'm here and I do care.

 

[ColorlessTrees]

I am here too. I care, and would definitely keep in touch. Please let me know if there's any way I can help.

 

[Lost Magic]

I know how you feel. Big hugs to you and sweet pea.

 

[LoneMisery]

Im so sorry to hear about your daughter. I cant imagine having a child and losing them.