greatgooglymoogly
Member
- Dec 1, 2023
- 79
Obviously neither are really feasible suicide methods but I wish they were. I am probably not as "extreme" as others with all this stuff yet but whatever. I often do 2-3 day stints of not sleeping, usually only broken by like 3-5 hours of sleep in between. I've been eating more over the winter but often I go a full week consuming only water. I've never done any like direct physical harm to myself (cutting/burning etc) but the pain and mental cloudiness I get from these helps like disconnect me from all the higher brain functions that make me miserable and want to kill myself. I just want to stay numb and I'd rather be like a shell of a person. Originally this all started from anxiety and stuff keeping me awake and killing my appetite but I just started leaning into it and a lot of it goes away. I've been depersonalizing hard and it's like my only escape until I kill myself. Hoping it just gets a little worse so I can overcome SI
