• Hey Guest,

    If you would still like to donate, you still can. We have more than enough funds to cover operating expenses for quite a while, so don't worry about donating if you aren't able. If you want to donate something other than what is listed, you can contact RainAndSadness.

    Bitcoin Address (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt

    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9

    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8

I

Identity

Member
Feb 17, 2019
32
Do not let your sudden depression and anger/impulsiveness make you ruin your suicide method.

2 days ago, I tried to CTB after being harassed by my older brother and being constantly bullied by him over the phone like a 5th grader mocking me for being suicidal (and many other things). It made me furious, then as I couldn't do anything to physically hurt him as he is in another city, my anger turned into pure insanity. Sadly, this lead to me not thinking well about timing my death right and I tried to CTB at 19:00 (7pm) instead of a bit later so everyone would at least be asleep. I was found just about 20-50 minutes later and brought to the hospital and thus survived it. Now my fentanyl is done, I don't have any left at all, and I need to wait to be euthanized now or die the 'hard' way (jumping, burning)
 
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
  • Like
Reactions: ithappens, TimeToDie, puppy9 and 15 others
Ruffian

Ruffian

Jumpin Jack Flash, it’s a gas gas gas
Jan 16, 2019
696
Oh no. I am sorry you had this happen. Your brother sounds like a terrible person, how can he bully his own blood? I can't imagine my sister doing that to me, even when she's angry at my suicidal thoughts. And good Lord can I relate to being brought back from an OD. It's the worst feeling in the world because you believed it was going to sleep for the last time. I'm sending you hugs, :hug: since I don't pray. Peace.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Rocksandsand, Circles and Jen0804
Oblivion Lover

Oblivion Lover

No life, no suffering
May 30, 2019
360
If people only thought about this before trying to do something serious... I, too, was impulsive and tried to kill myself without the necessary preparation and look at me. I'm still here. It's also important to remember that many people who attempt suicide impulsively and fail are not even sure that they want to die and are glad that they survived, giving rise to the statistics that make us truly suicidal people be seen as immature, impulsive, irrational, attention-seeking and etc. Nobody treat us seriously because of that.

On an unrelated note, I'm sorry that you went through that, specially when it was your relative that was the one trying to break you. I was bullied by my uncle when I was a kid and that made me extremely angry too because everyone thought of it as a joke. People can be so evil. I hope you have the opportunity to see your brother pay for that before you leave this ugly world.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Letmego. Please, Circles and Identity
Severen

Severen

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,819
Do not let your sudden depression and anger/impulsiveness make you ruin your suicide method.

2 days ago, I tried to CTB after being harassed by my older brother and being constantly bullied by him over the phone like a 5th grader mocking me for being suicidal (and many other things). It made me furious, then as I couldn't do anything to physically hurt him as he is in another city, my anger turned into pure insanity. Sadly, this lead to me not thinking well about timing my death right and I tried to CTB at 19:00 (7pm) instead of a bit later so everyone would at least be asleep. I was found just about 20-50 minutes later and brought to the hospital and thus survived it. Now my fentanyl is done, I don't have any left at all, and I need to wait to be euthanized now or die the 'hard' way (jumping, burning)

Why not just figure out, how to destroy his brain completely via mental abuse? You know him very well, yes? Then you should know what he is really sensitive about...and then unleash hell. Not hard to completely destroy someone's self esteem and program their brain to become his or her, worst enemy. Besides, when you resort to violence, in a way, he wins...because he can play the victim card and you are the one who has to deal with law enforcement. And CTBing would probably just give him satisfaction. Best case scenario, he starts avoiding you like the plague, the second you give him a taste of his own medicine. Then you don't have to deal with him, anymore.

 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Orin, omoidarui and Oblivion Lover
been_there

been_there

Life cares only for itself.
Jun 5, 2019
297
Why not just figure out, how to destroy his brain completely via mental abuse? You know him very well, yes? Then you should know what he is really sensitive about...and then unleash hell. Not hard to completely destroy someone's self esteem and program their brain to became his or her, worst enemy.
Of course that would require him giving a toss.
 
been_there

been_there

Life cares only for itself.
Jun 5, 2019
297
sure man, psychopathic edge, whatever gets u thru
 
I

Identity

Member
Feb 17, 2019
32
Oh no. I am sorry you had this happen. Your brother sounds like a terrible person, how can he bully his own blood? I can't imagine my sister doing that to me, even when she's angry at my suicidal thoughts. And good Lord can I relate to being brought back from an OD. It's the worst feeling in the world because you believed it was going to sleep for the last time. I'm sending you hugs, :hug: since I don't pray. Peace.
He's a terrible person.

My father who usually tends to be the one making me suffer was shocked by my brother and the way he was tormenting me. After he found out I was in the hospital and didn't even know whether I was gonna survive or not he sends me a message that 'he did me a favor by telling me I am a weak person for being suicidal, nobody dares to tell me this hard truth because I always cry like a baby or threaten to kill myself' he then also (still during my unconsciousness) sends me a message all in caps lock that I am mentally abusing and torturing him by trying to kill myself after he just spent a whole day harassing me. I was actually wondering whether I can file a complaint against him for this and perhaps just get screenshots on the local news and all of that out there. He's always been the most sociopathic cruel heartless asshole I've ever known, taking advantage of every possible factor he can, no matter how cruel or heartless.

Just like an actual sociopath he also used to fake crying and fake being really sorry throughout his entire life all to gain advantages.
If people only thought about this before trying to do something serious... I, too, was impulsive and tried to kill myself without the necessary preparation and look at me. I'm still here. It's also important to remember that many people who attempt suicide impulsively and fail are not even sure that they want to die and are glad that they survived, giving rise to the statistics that make us truly suicidal people be seen as immature, impulsive, irrational, attention-seeking and etc. Nobody treat us seriously because of that.

On an unrelated note, I'm sorry that you went through that, specially when it was your relative that was the one trying to break you. I was bullied by my uncle when I was a kid and that made me extremely angry too because everyone thought of it as a joke. People can be so evil. I hope you have the opportunity to see your brother pay for that before you leave this ugly world.
I really wish I could.

Read the above reply I sent to another user for a small update on what he sent afterwards.

Then again, we're both born of incest. My brother seems to have turned out into a sociopath; cruel, pretentious and taking advantage of every situation no matter how cruel the method. I turned out to be suicidal, depressed and autistic.

Either way, my mother is on top of all of this also another person who has made me suffer. She mocks me the same way my brother does (he kind of got his characteristics of being a cruel, heartless and sociopathic asshole from her). She told me the day before as well (to help my brother in attacking me) that I'm never gonna kill myself because I'm 1 too weak to actually do that 2 using the threat of killing myself to try and hurt other people.
When my dad sent her a message letting her know I'm in the hospital and it wasn't yet known whether I would survive or not, she sent me one message on WhatsApp calling me by my child nickname, then as soon as I simply said 'yes?' when I woke up after around 13 hours and she thus realized that I was not dead, she called me and immediately started shouting at me throwing insults left and right. I explained all of this to the hospital staff before I got my phone in the first place. I put her on speaker and let the staff hear how she was shouting at me after finding out I'm alive. They were super shocked. All I could think was how unlucky I am to be the one in a hundred thousand to have a mother and brother like this. To be born of incest. To have this shit life.
Why not just figure out, how to destroy his brain completely via mental abuse? You know him very well, yes? Then you should know what he is really sensitive about...and then unleash hell. Not hard to completely destroy someone's self esteem and program their brain to became his or her, worst enemy. Besides, when you resort to violence, in a way, he wins...because he can play the victim card and you are the one who has to deal with law enforcement. And CTBing would probably just give him satisfaction. Worst case, scenario, he avoids you like the plague to preserve his sanity.

Read the above reply.


He is a sociopath, I am more than 110% sure of it.

Also, because my father (who has been more pro-my brother his entire life) told him that he is going way too far with his insults and he was literally destroying me, my brother told my father to go fuck himself. Conveniently, my brother just graduated (after repeating his class 3 times).

He knew he just graduated and got about 500$ (350€) worth in support for his student dorm room for about 6 years, and after this, he cut off all contact with my father and blocked him on everything and admitted that he just now doesn't need him at all anymore, so he doesn't have to bend to my father's judgement anymore either.
What do you mean? Bullies can't stand having a taste of their own medicine.
I did actually do that though.

He is obese, has been so his entire life and it's perhaps the only thing that kept his ego from skyrocketing back when he was a bit younger. He even had to go to ER at the age of 14 because of an overdosis on cholestrol (too much mayonnaise and hamburgers).

A friend of mine suggested I reverse the situation and start mocking him for being fat: calling him 'weak' for not being able to control his urges to overeat (the way he called me 'weak' for 'not being able to fix my life'), saying that kids are starving in africa cuz he's eating all the food supplies (he said I should shut the fuck up about not being happy with my life because there are kids in China who 'have a room that their body doesn't even fit in' (??????)).

Anyway, he blocked me after I did this, only to unblock me about an hour later. That's when I attempted to CTB.

The vengeance wasn't worth it.

I wish a murder-suicide was possible for me. But it isn't, and I won't attempt it.
 
Last edited:
Severen

Severen

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,819
He's a terrible person.

My father who usually tends to be the one making me suffer was shocked by my brother and the way he was tormenting me. After he found out I was in the hospital and didn't even know whether I was gonna survive or not he sends me a message that 'he did me a favor by telling me I am a weak person for being suicidal, nobody dares to tell me this hard truth because I always cry like a baby or threaten to kill myself' he then also (still during my unconsciousness) sends me a message all in caps lock that I am mentally abusing and torturing him by trying to kill myself after he just spent a whole day harassing me. I was actually wondering whether I can file a complaint against him for this and perhaps just get screenshots on the local news and all of that out there. He's always been the most sociopathic cruel heartless asshole I've ever known, taking advantage of every possible factor he can, no matter how cruel or heartless.

Just like an actual sociopath he also used to fake crying and fake being really sorry throughout his entire life all to gain advantages.

I really wish I could.

Read the above reply I sent to another user for a small update on what he sent afterwards.

Then again, we're both born of incest. My brother seems to have turned out into a sociopath; cruel, pretentious and taking advantage of every situation no matter how cruel the method. I turned out to be suicidal, depressed and autistic.

Either way, my mother is on top of all of this also another person who has made me suffer. She mocks me the same way my brother does (he kind of got his characteristics of being a cruel, heartless and sociopathic asshole from her). She told me the day before as well (to help my brother in attacking me) that I'm never gonna kill myself because I'm 1 too weak to actually do that 2 using the threat of killing myself to try and hurt other people.
When my dad sent her a message letting her know I'm in the hospital and it wasn't yet known whether I would survive or not, she sent me one message on WhatsApp calling me by my child nickname, then as soon as I simply said 'yes?' when I woke up after around 13 hours and she thus realized that I was not dead, she called me and immediately started shouting at me throwing insults left and right. I explained all of this to the hospital staff before I got my phone in the first place. I put her on speaker and let the staff hear how she was shouting at me after finding out I'm alive. They were super shocked. All I could think was how unlucky I am to be the one in a hundred thousand to have a mother and brother like this. To be born of incest. To have this shit life.

Read the above reply.


He is a sociopath, I am more than 110% sure of it.

Also, because my father (who has been more pro-my brother his entire life) told him that he is going way too far with his insults and he was literally destroying me, my brother told my father to go fuck himself. Conveniently, my brother just graduated (after repeating his class 3 times).

He knew he just graduated and got about 500$ (350€) worth in support for his student dorm room for about 6 years, and after this, he cut off all contact with my father and blocked him on everything and admitted that he just now doesn't need him at all anymore, so he doesn't have to bend to my father's judgement anymore either.

When dealing with people like that, you can't reason with them etc... You have to vicious. Then they will just look for another target who wont fight back.
He's a terrible person.

My father who usually tends to be the one making me suffer was shocked by my brother and the way he was tormenting me. After he found out I was in the hospital and didn't even know whether I was gonna survive or not he sends me a message that 'he did me a favor by telling me I am a weak person for being suicidal, nobody dares to tell me this hard truth because I always cry like a baby or threaten to kill myself' he then also (still during my unconsciousness) sends me a message all in caps lock that I am mentally abusing and torturing him by trying to kill myself after he just spent a whole day harassing me. I was actually wondering whether I can file a complaint against him for this and perhaps just get screenshots on the local news and all of that out there. He's always been the most sociopathic cruel heartless asshole I've ever known, taking advantage of every possible factor he can, no matter how cruel or heartless.

Just like an actual sociopath he also used to fake crying and fake being really sorry throughout his entire life all to gain advantages.

I really wish I could.

Read the above reply I sent to another user for a small update on what he sent afterwards.

Then again, we're both born of incest. My brother seems to have turned out into a sociopath; cruel, pretentious and taking advantage of every situation no matter how cruel the method. I turned out to be suicidal, depressed and autistic.

Either way, my mother is on top of all of this also another person who has made me suffer. She mocks me the same way my brother does (he kind of got his characteristics of being a cruel, heartless and sociopathic asshole from her). She told me the day before as well (to help my brother in attacking me) that I'm never gonna kill myself because I'm 1 too weak to actually do that 2 using the threat of killing myself to try and hurt other people.
When my dad sent her a message letting her know I'm in the hospital and it wasn't yet known whether I would survive or not, she sent me one message on WhatsApp calling me by my child nickname, then as soon as I simply said 'yes?' when I woke up after around 13 hours and she thus realized that I was not dead, she called me and immediately started shouting at me throwing insults left and right. I explained all of this to the hospital staff before I got my phone in the first place. I put her on speaker and let the staff hear how she was shouting at me after finding out I'm alive. They were super shocked. All I could think was how unlucky I am to be the one in a hundred thousand to have a mother and brother like this. To be born of incest. To have this shit life.

Read the above reply.


He is a sociopath, I am more than 110% sure of it.

Also, because my father (who has been more pro-my brother his entire life) told him that he is going way too far with his insults and he was literally destroying me, my brother told my father to go fuck himself. Conveniently, my brother just graduated (after repeating his class 3 times).

He knew he just graduated and got about 500$ (350€) worth in support for his student dorm room for about 6 years, and after this, he cut off all contact with my father and blocked him on everything and admitted that he just now doesn't need him at all anymore, so he doesn't have to bend to my father's judgement anymore either.

I did actually do that though.

He is obese, has been so his entire life and it's perhaps the only thing that kept his ego from skyrocketing back when he was a bit younger. He even had to go to ER at the age of 14 because of an overdosis on cholestrol (too much mayonnaise and hamburgers).

A friend of mine suggested I reverse the situation and start mocking him for being fat: calling him 'weak' for not being able to control his urges to overeat (the way he called me 'weak' for 'not being able to fix my life'), saying that kids are starving in africa cuz he's eating all the food supplies (he said I should shut the fuck up about not being happy with my life because there are kids in China who 'have a room that their body doesn't even fit in' (??????)).

Anyway, he blocked me after I did this, only to unblock me about an hour later. That's when I attempted to CTB.

The vengeance wasn't worth it.

I wish a murder-suicide was possible for me. But it isn't, and I won't attempt it.
He blocked you after you did this, so you hit a nerve. Keep at it and he might decide to back off. Persistence is the key.
 
Last edited:
I

Identity

Member
Feb 17, 2019
32
When dealing with people like that, you can't reason with them etc... You have to vicious. Then they will just look for another target who wont fight back.

He blocked you after you did this, so you hit a nerve. Keep at it and he might decide to back off.
I like your thirst for vengeance, but I am by nature not at all so obsessed with it. Well it depends, if he would show up in our home rather than texting his insults 100km away, I would grab a crowbar and bash his head into the ground as hard as I could. Sadly he knows that, so he pulled his classic move and when asked to come say these stuff to my face he said he had 'no time' and 'had to go swimming' (he kept texting the entire time while he was supposedly swimming, and he's freaking obese and can't swim at all lmao but anyway).
 
  • Like
Reactions: Severen
Severen

Severen

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,819
I like your thirst for vengeance, but I am by nature not at all so obsessed with it. Well it depends, if he would show up in our home rather than texting his insults 100km away, I would grab a crowbar and bash his head into the ground as hard as I could. Sadly he knows that, so he pulled his classic move and when asked to come say these stuff to my face he said he had 'no time' and 'had to go swimming' (he kept texting the entire time while he was supposedly swimming, and he's freaking obese and can't swim at all lmao but anyway).

I mean, it's an act of vengeance but also an act of self defense. The best defense is the best offense. Deep down, he is a weak, cowardly bully. You just have to make him realize, you've had enough and now you are going to inflict pain and suffering upon him. After that, you will have peace and quiet. Right now, he just sees you are prey and not the predator. So that is why he is being so horrible towards you. If not, he will never stop. And it would be tragic for you to CTB just because of a bully, when these people are easy to take care of, unlike psychopaths.
 
  • Like
Reactions: omoidarui and KnightBlade
I

Identity

Member
Feb 17, 2019
32
I mean, it's an act of vengeance but also an act of self defense. The best defense is the best offense. Deep down, he is a weak, cowardly bully. You just have to make him realize, you've had enough and now you are going to inflict pain and suffering upon him. After that, you will have peace and quiet. Right now, he just sees you are prey and not the predator. So that is why he is being so horrible towards you. If not, he will never stop. And it would be tragic for you to CTB just because of a bully, when these people are easy to take care of, unlike psychopaths.

And how exactly would you want me to do this? Teleporting behind him and beat him up?

Life isn't a movie man.

Anyway, please also don't assume I'm ctb'ing just because of him. I have been suicidal since the age of 11. I'm in a steady euthanasia process right now. I don't wanna end up in jail and have my last chance at a good death cancelled because I valued vengeance over my own peace of mind.
 
S

Strumgewehr

Experienced
Jun 7, 2018
271
Come up with worst insults about him, call him or text all him, get it all off your chest. Hang up after telling him to go fuck your whore of a mom and father the resulting one eyed freak as his baby. And cut all ties with both of them, never to look back. Don't forget to mention him that you'll beat him to a pulp if you ever met him accidently.
 
  • Like
Reactions: omoidarui and Orin
I

Identity

Member
Feb 17, 2019
32
Come up with worst insults about him, call him or text all him, get it all off your chest. Hang up after telling him to go fuck your whore of a mom and father the resulting one eyed freak as his baby. And cut all ties with both of them, never to look back. Don't forget to mention him that you'll beat him to a pulp if you ever met him accidently.
Come up with worst insults about him, call him or text all him, get it all off your chest. Hang up after telling him to go fuck your whore of a mom and father the resulting one eyed freak as his baby. And cut all ties with both of them, never to look back. Don't forget to mention him that you'll beat him to a pulp if you ever met him accidently.
I don't have the energy anymore to commit to this type of vengeance anymore.
 
  • Like
Reactions: DepressionsAHo

Similar threads

I
Replies
2
Views
234
Suicide Discussion
AbusedInnocent
AbusedInnocent
halcyon
Replies
3
Views
292
Suicide Discussion
lharrywheel
L
VampQueen
Replies
2
Views
212
Suicide Discussion
VampQueen
VampQueen