Discussion Should You Make Friends on SS?

[puella]

I want to preface this by saying I still want to help people regardless. I care about everyone no matter our personal connection.

But should I try to form connections with people? I would like to make friends who can understand me better, and this seems like a good place. I can't talk to most of my friends about heavy topics.

But it's hard to trust people online. Especially in a place as sensitive as this. I don't want to get hurt. I also don't want to see something horrible happen to someone I am close to. My best and only friend for all of the time I was a teen died by suicide. I don't want to see that happen again.

 

[nicotine_goblin]

Considering your experience I wouldn't want to make close connections here if I were you. A lot of people here are planning to pass soon and I personally wouldn't want to get close with someone just to lose them or for them to lose me. Just to avoid unnecessary pain

 

[SpiritualDeath]

tbh i wouldn't say you can trust ppl irl 100% as well. It depends, and you can only rely on your judgement.
If you see suicide as horrible and don't want to see ppl close to you leave, I don't recommend making friends here.

 

[puella]

tbh i wouldn't say you can trust ppl irl 100% as well. It depends, and you can only rely on your judgement.
If you see suicide as horrible and don't want to see ppl close to you leave, I don't recommend making friends here.

I don't think it's always a horrible thing. It may also be the choice I make. But it does feel horrible to lose someone, even if I know they're in a better place. Or maybe I'm just selfish.

 

[dmdmdm]

I've made some friends on here and I'm glad I did. You can talk about everything and it's non-judgemental

 

[Kempel556]

I wouldn't consider using SS just to make friends, but to find people with similar struggles and who can understand what you are going through in life, because most normal people can't. But of course you can make friends here that's perfectly fine

 

[SVEN]

If your intent is to make friends whom you are prepared to lose, with all the emotional trauma that may bring you, then sure. Just, please, always remember that there are all types of emotional predators online with their own, selfish motives for searching out vulnerable people. And they are usually very good at presenting in a way they know you wish to hear.

 

[S like suicide]

But it's hard to trust people online. Especially in a place as sensitive as this. I don't want to get hurt.

Yeah exactly this...There are many kind and understanding people here but also people who may hurt you, ghost you and even sexual predators so always be careful who you share personal information with.

 

[Peerless_Cucumber]

A lot of people in rl want me to stay. Even some people who were suicidal didn't want me to go. I'm afraid that even on here people who I've become friends with would want me to stay. I'm open to becoming friends with people here but this is the only site where I can share my pain. If people started to try and persuade me to keep living even on here I'd feel a lot worse. So because of that idk if I'll ever make friends on here.

 

[ClownWorld2023]

Don't share any of your personal information or any other information that can be tied to you.
Some people can use that to try to figure out your real life identity.

See what happened here for example: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/not-to-fearmonger-but.135192

 

[razorblade]

I wouldn't really recommend it on here sure they may understand but most people on here are gonna end up attempting or passing away which is just gonna fuck even more with your mental health. If you will end up however making friends just don't get to close to them especially if you know they have active plan and don't share personal things that means they can find out who you are for explain if you have a very unique name or the exact town you live in because if they do pass away and people find like chat logs you might get fucked over and accused of helping them which won't turn out the best

 

[SMmetalhead36]

I'm not sure if I would due to my extremely severe trust issues.

 

[FuneralCry]

The way I see it, this website is more of a place for people to openly discuss the subject of suicide and research methods without always recieving a pro-life response rather than a making friends site for lonely people. I agree that other people cannot be trusted, I also believe that most people don't stay on here for long anyway.

And I'm not sure what you mean by "help" but if you mean pushing unsolicted advice and pro-life comments onto people when it wasn't asked for then people come to this site to escape from that, it's a pro-choice site for people to vent and have their wish to die respected. Like I said I might be misunderstanding but if you want to "help" there is the recovery section for that or there might be posts where people are specifically looking for advice.

 

[puella]

The way I see it, this website is more of a place for people to openly discuss the subject of suicide and research methods without always recieving a pro-life response rather than a making friends site for lonely people. I agree that other people cannot be trusted, I also believe that most people don't stay on here for long anyway.

And I'm not sure what you mean by "help" but if you mean pushing unsolicted advice and pro-life comments onto people when it wasn't asked for then people come to this site to escape from that, it's a pro-choice site for people to vent and have their wish to die respected. Like I said I might be misunderstanding but if you want to "help" there is the recovery section for that or there might be posts where people are specifically looking for advice.

I'm not pro-life. I guess I'm too optimistic—my own goals are likely a naive time sink—but I wouldn't try to unsolicitedly shove that on others.

I just want everyone to feel cared about.

 

[Ε. Η. R.]

I want to preface this by saying I still want to help people regardless. I care about everyone no matter our personal connection.

But should I try to form connections with people? I would like to make friends who can understand me better, and this seems like a good place. I can't talk to most of my friends about heavy topics.

I just want everyone to feel cared about.

I think there's nothing wrong with that.
These are good thoughts.
Just need to remember that many people who have already passed the point of no return come here.
As well, in this place come those who have been betrayed by "friends", "parents" and those who are even dearer.
I was betrayed, tormented by the transwomans (in russian and ukranian transgender community). Those who were dearest to me than anyone in this world. As you can understand, before, I solidly considered myself as transwoman. But, after absolute hell, I often feel - I just can't, no matter how much I want to.
I think, people similar me end up here, who don't really believe anymore in human kindness or friendship.

Or maybe I'm just selfish.

No.

 

[jussaloser]

i dont post frequently but i read almost everything and people on here are genuinely kind and helpful.

not necessarily looking for friends but it feels like the safest place to vent hence i chose "maybe"

 

[Dying2077]

NO , Feelings are difficult to control,

so I will not leave a poor person with fake love for a short period unless they want to continue living

 

[Stormy Raine]

Yes you can make friends on here, BUT it can be complicated and can lead to criminal charges if too much is said. I have someone I spoke with a few times and next day they caught their bus without telling me. They asked if we could go together but I wasn't ready. The next day they left without me. I had mixed emotions sad, happy, hurt, betrayed etc. People on here are at different stages of suicide, some fantasize, other are here just for a minute and leave for good. Just be careful and try to limit it to just online. Then if you tell someone your plan or if they tell you and you know their number and don't call for help you can be in trouble.

 

[puella]

But, after absolute hell, I just can't, no matter how much I want to.

I'm so sorry. I do understand. It's so unfair, I wish you could have gotten a chance to live as your authentic self.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's a real risk. If you feel like you could be deeply affected by losing someone here- probably best not to get too attached. It can be nice to form closer bonds with people here. I have done it on a couple of occasions. One lady though took her life last December. I still think about her. We have to accept it though- especially here. There's the advantage that we know it's a possibility I guess but I think- being pro-choice- we have to accept their choice.

 

[Zaphkiel]

You do you. It's situationnal.
Just be ware of common thing like not telling personnal info, and nothing can really happens anyway, if it's an asshole, just block her/him

 

[Thalassa]

No.

 

[Misaki Nakahara]

I wish to remain anon while being this site as much as possible because I fear someone in my life possibly finding out. I do not want help ;
but the idea of having a friend who might feel the same way I do might be nice but I believe it's too risky. People like to pray on the vulnerable unfortunately. ):

 

[IWishToDie]

I want to preface this by saying I still want to help people regardless. I care about everyone no matter our personal connection.

But should I try to form connections with people? I would like to make friends who can understand me better, and this seems like a good place. I can't talk to most of my friends about heavy topics.

But it's hard to trust people online. Especially in a place as sensitive as this. I don't want to get hurt. I also don't want to see something horrible happen to someone I am close to. My best and only friend for all of the time I was a teen died by suicide. I don't want to see that happen again.

It's not healthy but I keep dreaming about my body getting better and losing my need to suicide, maybe meeting someone on here who gets better too for whatever reason and we go on to have a really amazing friendship. All my friends left when I was injured. Life just ends when you're injured badly. F*ck them all. Like I said, it's not a healthy dream or a realistic expectation but it's this 'happy ending' scenario I keep thinking about. I'll most likely be dead this year and I guess my dream just keeps me numb like an opiate. I hope nobody takes my dream the wrong way, it's not my intention for being here it's just this dream I've had lately. I came here to be away from normal social media and to learn about CTB in more detail. Love and hugs to all who are suffering and in pain that just won't stop.

"Don't you worry child, see heaven's got a plan for you."

 

[deathviahanging]

i wouldn't say you can't make friends on here, it'll probably be easier considering how open most people on here are, but u can easily get hurt, i'd say be careful but dont hold yourself back from making friends on here

 

[Circles]

Look I'm not going to sit here and say no because I have never had friends in real life and the closest I ever had to 'friendships' were ones I made on here however shallow people may think that differently. Keep in mind that people come here with the intention to ctb and to not make friends. Because of that reality sooner or later people are going to leave either to ctb or maybe life just happens and eventually you'll lose in touch with them. I've been here for years now and nowadays because of the way things are I am hesitant to make friends. People here are suffering and it sucks that you can't help the people you grow to care about.

I'll never forget one member I stayed in touch for quite a while and when eventually they were going to ctb I was there through it all with them. I was most likely the last person they ever interacted with and that sort of responsibility can become too much to handle and mentally fucks with you. You never get to meet them, but despite that some of the best most moments I had with others were on here. The people who pour their heart and soul out to show compassion and kindness to others are in my eyes are true angels. And because of that seeing them go through with suicide becomes so real, conflicting, and soul crushing. I'm still depressed and even grieve for them that they're gone but I'm happy to have spent time with them and got to know them. I guess what I'm really trying to say is yes making friends on here can be worth it, but please be aware of the situation of what may happen when one of you catches the bus.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

For me it's a yes. Friendship happens everywhere, probably especially in a place like Sasu. Lots of us are lonely.
Through the years I've made some close friends here. Some are still here, others have passed on. Yes, that fucking hurts. But I'm glad I've met them, that they wanted to share such a difficult time with me, I'll never forget their friendship and trust. They're still on my mind and I'm grateful to have met, always.

 

[Abyssal]

Nothing matters. I don't see why not.

 

[Burden_Bailey]

Finding like minded ppl and making friends is nice

 

[loslassen]

I was just thinking about this a couple nights ago before sleep, not to mention it made me toss and turn in grief… I had some fun conversations with people in the Doomer chat, and I can't stop thinking about them. If you ever wonder if you make an impact on other people's lives, believe me, like it or not, you do… we are a social species, we are our most valuable resource, we matter to each other regardless, and I'm sorry if you've been deprived of that, you deserve a hug.

Going into more detail and without drifting topics, I couldn't stop thinking about them because it was genuinely a conversation I enjoyed, and it saddened me that we had to meet this way, that we're all here for a common reason, and that I might never hear from one of them again.