With0ut

With0ut

In bereft land, a raven, flies.
Oct 1, 2023
38
i'm planning on ctb and i want some different perspectives on if cutting ties (gf,parents,siblings,etc…) is something i should do. i don't want them to be hurt but i can't keep on living, i'm 19 and can easily move out as i have enough money saved (not enough for long term but enough for about 6 months of rent) and cut all contact with the people in my life. Will it make my absence more or less painful? i wish i didn't have to be perceived at all and could just leave on my own terms, but if anything is left of my it should be the people i held close.
 
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WAITING TO DIE

WAITING TO DIE

TORMENTED
Sep 30, 2023
1,539
I began by gradually isolating myself from everyone in a physical sense by moving away, and then cutting down on things like phone calls and texts.
Out of sight , out of mind .
 
F

F@#$

Freedom seeker
Nov 8, 2023
786
I want to leave a mess. As much chaos and pain I can leave behind
 
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piddincir

piddincir

Student
Nov 6, 2023
180
I can speak out of experience on this. Hard truth, it'll be hard regardless what you do on those who care for you, even those you think don't care. I guess it really depends on how much you really care about the other people in your life

If you cut people out, you will leave them wondering what more they could have done to help you. If you don't they will wonder why you did it when you had them in your lives. Either way the outcome is more of less the same, questioning why and what more they could have done. Leaving a note can help people understand your reasons but can also leave people questioning more.

My wife took her own life a month ago and I have had countless messages from her friends, sad that they didn't reach out more and feeling guilty about it, ultimately it wouldn't have made a difference. I did all I could but couldn't save her and still left questioning why I wasn't enough (despite coming to terms that this was her choice and knowing I couldn't have done more).

It changed my life irrevocably and broke me beyond repair leaving me without a future or world I can live in. I know first hand the grief that her suicide has had on so many people - myself, her family, my family, our friends, her friends, my friends, work colleagues even the postman. That said knowing the grief I will cause would not be enough to stop me.

Ultimately I think it's best not to cut people out, let the people in your life who care for you care for you to the end.

Also, I would implore you not to let anyone who deeply care for you find your body that makes an already hard situation unbearable.

wishing you peace
 
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tourniquetbunny

tourniquetbunny

Bnuy girl
Nov 13, 2023
16
Even people who don't like you will feel impacted by your death. Regardless of what happens, it will be painful for everyone. This is no reason not to do it nor to do it, you will be dead so their feelings mean absolutely nothing to you at that point. Just ensure its something that is truly right for you, as it may not be for everyone.
Be safe and I wish you peace friend ❤️
 
アホペンギン

アホペンギン

Jul 10, 2023
2,199
Cutting ties to prevent any unwanted painfulness for those left behind is in a way useless because in addition to your death, they'll also suffer from not knowing why you cut ties with them, before they realize it was because you planned to ctb.

I personally think it's best to leave a note for everyone explaining why you made your decision, etc.