Didnt sleep last night due to a barrage of intrusive thoughts racing round in my head, These thought attacks just come out of nowhere and go round and round in a constant loop that seems never ending. The thoughts are always about abuse I have suffered in the past and how I want to make the people suffer who hurt me. The thing is that I do not actively think these thoughts myself, it is as though they happen automatically. I cant eat or concentrate and today has just passed by in a fog of these automatic intrusive thoughts. These attacks usually last a couple of days and then just disappear as suddenly as they appeared. Im sick of this shit, its been going on for years, and never gets better. I was thinking of ctb by using the VSED method, but I think it is too slow to endure. I remember reading about a guy who built his own guillotine that definately worked when he tried it. I like the idea of this because it is a foregone conclusion that when your head fully seperates from your body then you will have definately ctb. There is a full scale war going on in my head at the moment, so I think I will look into building one when my head quietens down a bit and I can concentrate.
-
UK users: Due to a formal investigation into this site by Ofcom under the UK Online Safety Act 2023, we strongly recommend using a trusted, no-logs VPN. This will help protect your privacy, bypass censorship, and maintain secure access to the site. Read the full VPN guide here.
-
Hey Guest,
Today, OFCOM launched an official investigation into Sanctioned Suicide under the UK’s Online Safety Act. This has already made headlines across the UK.
This is a clear and unprecedented overreach by a foreign regulator against a U.S.-based platform. We reject this interference and will be defending the site’s existence and mission.
In addition to our public response, we are currently seeking legal representation to ensure the best possible defense in this matter. If you are a lawyer or know of one who may be able to assist, please contact us at [email protected].
Read our statement here:
Donate via cryptocurrency:
Bitcoin (BTC): 34HyDHTvEhXfPfb716EeEkEHXzqhwtow1LEthereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8
Tackingintothewind
Mage
- Mar 2, 2021
- 530
I'm not sure if this will help you but to go to sleep I a) take meds and b) listen to a podcast, not one I'm very interested in, but one I still find interesting, I listen to it until I go to sleep to stop my head from going elsewhere.
Thank you. I no longer take meds because they do not work or make me feel worse. I also cannot sit still or focus on anything. But thank you anyway.
ImsooDone1N
Arcanist
- Nov 22, 2018
- 858
Yes, anxiety is horrible. I've a very severe anxiety disorder. Panic attacks to. Combined with ocd, depression & few other ailments, I would not be able to function let alone cope without medication. Specifically, anti anxiety medicine. There are many meds to treat anxiety, and this is where w doctor could help. I don't like needing benzodiazepines & opiates to function, but If the benefits outweigh the risks.. Being consumed by anxiety to the point of being unable to function isn't something many people understand. Hope that you can talk with a doctor & possibly get some relief & rest.
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
I also suffer from the same, have you tried bentos? If not maybe talk to your doctor, but bear in mind it's addictive but does work.
Thanks. I have been down that road quite a few times when I was younger in the 80s, and doctors gave them out much easier then they do now, and like you say addiction is a problem. Besides, the doctors in the UK are rubbish. They just try to palm you off with shit like effexor, citalopram etc, and the last time I spoke to a doctor about this he tried to have me sectioned so I dont trust them. My heads a little better now because of exhaustion. Sooo tired.
Last edited:
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
There afe no Xanax in the uk I know, citalopram only makes you more anxious. Effexor also didn't do anything for me. You need benzos those arenito benzos. They don't have Xanax in the uk butbtheybhave diazepam and Valium, tge thing is some patients sell these. That's why they are so strict in the UK. A boy from Northern Ireland pays 80 quid for 20 Xanax, I pay 4 euros a box if 60 with a script. The problem in the uk is addiction. And then good people like us who need it won't get it. Hugs hun, stay strong.
Thanks. Im starting to feel a little better now because Im so exhausted. Burned all my nervous energy up so am feeling way too wiped out to be worked up anymore .
Tackingintothewind
Mage
- Mar 2, 2021
- 530
Lorazepam worked really well
Yeah the uk doesn't give good meds at all... nanny state that it is
Thank you. It always helps when you hear from others who are going through the same kind of hell. Very few people understand what we feel, not even Doctors.
Yes,. that is a huge problem in the UK. Street dealers everywhere where I live. Lots of people abusing these meds when they dont need them. Its been like that for years now, too much drug abuse. A lot of them end up on psych wards through their own fault, and we have to suffer the consequences of a broken mental health system.
Last edited:
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 43,338
I am sorry that you are suffering so much. I can imagine that it must be unbearable dealing with so much anxiety. I understand that it is hard to carry on when you cannot take anymore of this life. I wish you the best in whatever happens.
june
Experienced
- May 25, 2020
- 208
Cheers to you mates. You are all strong! It has been rough for us all, hope you can talk and blow off some steam here
