Discussion Selfharm

[selfkillermachine]

Poor english, sorry in advance

Probably someone already made a post about this, but how do you guys often harm yourself? Do your hide so noone get worried? Do you lie when they notice the bruises? And why you do that?

Recently im getting over stressed in my job even with tiny problems that making myself punch and stabbing myself with small sharp obejcts, but even if I try do make it in hide spots I impulsively end up punch in my face and everyone ends up noticing it, it feels awful to lie and they probably know what im doing, but I cant afford to tell whats wrong with me, I dont want to cause troubles, its noone problem, i just want to ctb

 

[notsosillybilly]

i would occasionally cut myself but haven't been able to cuz it'd be hard to hide them, i'm staying at my fwbs + his mom's house, if they saw fresh scars on me that's a new issue that i don't have energy for tbh. hopefully your job becomes less stressful

 

[selfkillermachine]

Not being able to break something, not being able to shout, not being able to redirect your frustation in nothing neither yourself, it must be a hell having to somehow endure the stress without someone finding out

 

[burninghill]

I got caught cutting once when I was 14, stopped and started again (with some blips between) at 18. I haven't been properly caught since and I'm 20.

I cut deliberately visibly on my arms, not my wrists but the outter part with razor blades. I started to get fed up with how messy all of the blood was though since I'd cut deep, so I switched to cigarette burns on my upper wrist close to my hand. My friends have seen but have never said anything and my parents do not know, so I haven't had a problem.

 

[iwkmsssb]

i cut myself on the upper thigh area but i'm starting to run out of room. but i'd say it's the most hidden spot in day to day life. no one knows unless i tell them about it.

 

[SASU-KE]

impulsively end up punch in my face and everyone ends up noticing it, it feels awful to lie and they probably know what im doing

It's probably more likely that they think you're being abused by someone else. But either way it's going to create problems.

 

[selfkillermachine]

It's probably more likely that they think you're being abused by someone else. But either way it's going to creage problem

Some of them know that I harmed myself, its specially to my family that I lie, the last punch I did near my eye, they thought I fell, I know its not good but its better to be that way

 

[insekurity]

daily tbh, only superficial or partial thickness on my thighs because im too embarrassed to go to the er. only the barest minimum effort to hide it, and its a bit too obvious because its cuts and otherwise no one really questions why i have welts from scratching myself everywhere.

mostly to make my disorders visible as otherwise i end up gaslighting myself into thinking theres nothing wrong with me im just fundamentally a disgusting and terrible person. for some reason my meds, diagnoses, papers don't work against the self-minimization and self-gaslighting so i end up relying on cutting, and when they heal or fade i need to reset it.

 

[current93]

ive been self harming since the age of 10 or 11, and i'm now 24 so i unfortunately have a lot of experience. started with just poking myself with sharp objects or scraping shards of broken glass across my skin, which eventually lead to cutting. i've been doing it on and off since then and have a lot of pretty nasty scars, but have managed to hide it from my family and everyone who knows me irl this whole time somehow. It's probably the dumbest coping mechanism imo.

 

[cyan_cat]

I usually do cutting, either thighs or arms, since i don't really care that much if people notice anymore and i usually wear long sleeves anyways. But when i really don't want people to notice i just do bruises. I like it because i can get it to hurt a lot, and people just assume i am clumsy or i can make up an excuse easily. It doesn't feel good to lie to people about it, but sometimes it's better i think.

 

[lilybug02]

I started Sh when i was a kid. I have noticeable self harm cuts on my wrist but nobody has ever said anything about it to me and i am not worried about people seeing them or hiding them. The worst is on my upper thighs its very hard to wear shorts without them bring seen they are pretty nasty and there are many but if people saw them it really wouldn't bother me. hope you're job becomes less stressful noone should have to feel that way at there job.

 

[suicidalyuri]

I started at 16 when I got an apprenticeship in an office job I didn't actually like, that was boring and at the same time too stressful because of a lot social interactions were necessary at times and I was too awkward all the time. I cycled to there every morning with my mountain bike and back home every evening and on the way there was a wooden bench nearby the cycleway. One day thought like let's try sh out (which was such a mistake in retrospect) and took my kitchen knife with me and cycled to said bench just when the sun disappeared below the horizon. I was in a discord vc with a friend that night and somehow we got on the topic of everything becoming worse with wars and everything. I wanted to talk about positive things again but he just kept yapping about inflation and everything and at some point I just listened and thought maybe he's right and we're doomed or sth I don't care and I sh-ed myself for the first time. On the way home I was thinking to myself omg I've never done something like this, I shouldn't ever do it again but at the same time the feeling was kinda good and refreshing. With the days going by and my job still being kinda shit and I guess some weltschmerz going on in my head, I started doing sh more regularly and made it some kind of ritual cycling to that wooden bench every night, where I could be by myself for some hours and no one judged me. And so I slowly started descending into a phase of my life that was marked by addiction, self-pity and a loss of self-worth, some things of which I still retain to this day (actually everything except sh itself, which is good but I don't feel like it has gotten any better).

tldr: bad circumstances and stress that I could've just erased by quitting my apprenticeship right away

 

[rxcha]

Poor english, sorry in advance

Probably someone already made a post about this, but how do you guys often harm yourself? Do your hide so noone get worried? Do you lie when they notice the bruises? And why you do that?

Recently im getting over stressed in my job even with tiny problems that making myself punch and stabbing myself with small sharp obejcts, but even if I try do make it in hide spots I impulsively end up punch in my face and everyone ends up noticing it, it feels awful to lie and they probably know what im doing, but I cant afford to tell whats wrong with me, I dont want to cause troubles, its noone problem, i just want

gave myself tmj punching myself like that lol, good luck op

 

[FluffIsJustice]

In regards to punching my face, I found that using the bones in my hand (the joint between my hand and arm) to knock on my temples left me no bruises but caused plenty of (desired) pain. Probably shouldn't do it too hard though, as it is close to the brain. In regards to cutting, a lot of others already mentioned it (and burning is the only one I never tried). I also tried hitting my head on walls but quit right away, as that is really noisy and I certainly do not want any attention while doing sh. Why ... mainly self punishment?