Seeing women I grew up getting married i feel like a failure

[FireFox]

Ever since turning 25 years old and seeing women I grew up with getting married or having a serious relationships honestly has really broken me. Everyone is doing so well in life except me.

It is a painful reminder of how I was always that rejected girl at school while all other girls got boyfriends I feel so alone and I am ashamed that I am struggling at 25 years old. Everything in my life is a failure.

I am always going to be that rejected woman and nobody in this world really understands being single forever feels like . I don't feel even feel like a woman anymore because we are always told by society a girl,woman is beautiful and something to be desired but growing boys and never found me pretty like they did with the other girls at school. The boys at school thought I was werid because I correctly answered in class, had strong opinions on issues, fought back against the builles in the school. I struggle to fit in a lot. The girls at school excluded me from thier friendship groups, my university friends who were women also excluded me from thingsThe. I am too different that is the problem. I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal. Everyone has their 1st boyfriend as a teenager. Women can't relate to my life and I can't relate to theirs either. I was born a woman but I don't feel like one. I am starting to identify as non binary because of all this, I feel so disconnected from the gender I was born as and lonely.

I am average looking and got boring features which is black hair, brown eyes and brown skin. Majority of Men want a super attractive women that they see on the pornography they stream on their devices, on the Onlyfans account they subscribe to. The woman with blonde hair and blue eyes will always be seen as beautiful by society and men. Being black woman society just makes fun of our features.

 

[l0stc4use]

I can relate to you. I'm 22 almost 23 and my only relationships have been online. It makes me feel so ugly and like I'm going to be alone forever. I'm sorry this has happened to you. I wish I could give you some advice but just know you're not alone.

 

[Superdeterminist]

Relate. I do NOT want to hear about how old schoolmates are doing today, I go out of my way to avoid such information.

I keep saying this, but I want to reiterate. Race is irrelevant, in my opinion. The trait of attractiveness is found in every race, but is a privilege which only the few enjoy, no matter what race you're looking at. That's how it seems to me. And this rarity is something to lament, because it means that few win and most lose, in the game of attraction.

 

[Hurt]

All my friends live alone in their own homes and I still live with my parents. Other few friends too but majority of them are independent. I'm in my 30s and that makes me feel like a failure.

 

[Julgran]

Ever since turning 25 years old and seeing women I grew up with getting married or having a serious relationships honestly has really broken me. Everyone is doing so well in life except me.

It is a painful reminder of how I was always that rejected girl at school while all other girls got boyfriends I feel so alone and I am ashamed that I am struggling at 25 years old. Everything in my life is a failure.

I am always going to be that rejected woman and nobody in this world really understands being single forever feels like . I don't feel even feel like a woman anymore because we are always told by society a girl,woman is beautiful and something to be desired but growing boys and never found me pretty like they did with the other girls at school. The boys at school thought I was werid because I correctly answered in class, had strong opinions on issues, fought back against the builles in the school. I struggle to fit in a lot. The girls at school excluded me from thier friendship groups, my university friends who were women also excluded me from thingsThe. I am too different that is the problem. I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal. Everyone has their 1st boyfriend as a teenager. Women can't relate to my life and I can't relate to theirs either. I was born a woman but I don't feel like one. I am starting to identify as non binary because of all this, I feel so disconnected from the gender I was born as and lonely.

I am average looking and got boring features which is black hair, brown eyes and brown skin. Majority of Men want a super attractive women that they see on the pornography they stream on their devices, on the Onlyfans account they subscribe to. The woman with blonde hair and blue eyes will always be seen as beautiful by society and men. Being black woman society just makes fun of our features.

It's easy to feel like a failure in today's society, but you are not. At least the Millennial generation and Generation Z have had a really hard time finding work, apartments and forming families - those are just signs of the times that we are living in.

Having said the above, you are still only 25 years old, so if you find someone within the next few years, you still have time to form your own family, if you still wish to do so then. Good luck!

 

[london3]

Ever since turning 25 years old and seeing women I grew up with getting married or having a serious relationships honestly has really broken me. Everyone is doing so well in life except me.

It is a painful reminder of how I was always that rejected girl at school while all other girls got boyfriends I feel so alone and I am ashamed that I am struggling at 25 years old. Everything in my life is a failure.

I am always going to be that rejected woman and nobody in this world really understands being single forever feels like . I don't feel even feel like a woman anymore because we are always told by society a girl,woman is beautiful and something to be desired but growing boys and never found me pretty like they did with the other girls at school. The boys at school thought I was werid because I correctly answered in class, had strong opinions on issues, fought back against the builles in the school. I struggle to fit in a lot. The girls at school excluded me from thier friendship groups, my university friends who were women also excluded me from thingsThe. I am too different that is the problem. I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal. Everyone has their 1st boyfriend as a teenager. Women can't relate to my life and I can't relate to theirs either. I was born a woman but I don't feel like one. I am starting to identify as non binary because of all this, I feel so disconnected from the gender I was born as and lonely.

I am average looking and got boring features which is black hair, brown eyes and brown skin. Majority of Men want a super attractive women that they see on the pornography they stream on their devices, on the Onlyfans account they subscribe to. The woman with blonde hair and blue eyes will always be seen as beautiful by society and men. Being black woman society just makes fun of our features.

Really sorry about how you feel.

Speaking as a straight man there are so many ways that society puts unnecessary pressure on women which i totally disagree with. This obsession with beauty is very damaging for humanity and women are used by companies and the media as sex objects to promote unhealthy and unreachable standards.

This forum has a high amount of LGBT people and there are some great people that can support you if have questions about your identity.

I wish you well and hope you feel better soon.

I can relate to you. I'm 22 almost 23 and my only relationships have been online. It makes me feel so ugly and like I'm going to be alone forever. I'm sorry this has happened to you. I wish I could give you some advice but just know you're not alone.

You are young and have time to change your life. I hope you will find someone soon.

 

[LunaNyx_]

Ever since turning 25 years old and seeing women I grew up with getting married or having a serious relationships honestly has really broken me. Everyone is doing so well in life except me.

It is a painful reminder of how I was always that rejected girl at school while all other girls got boyfriends I feel so alone and I am ashamed that I am struggling at 25 years old. Everything in my life is a failure.

I am always going to be that rejected woman and nobody in this world really understands being single forever feels like . I don't feel even feel like a woman anymore because we are always told by society a girl,woman is beautiful and something to be desired but growing boys and never found me pretty like they did with the other girls at school. The boys at school thought I was werid because I correctly answered in class, had strong opinions on issues, fought back against the builles in the school. I struggle to fit in a lot. The girls at school excluded me from thier friendship groups, my university friends who were women also excluded me from thingsThe. I am too different that is the problem. I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal. Everyone has their 1st boyfriend as a teenager. Women can't relate to my life and I can't relate to theirs either. I was born a woman but I don't feel like one. I am starting to identify as non binary because of all this, I feel so disconnected from the gender I was born as and lonely.

I am average looking and got boring features which is black hair, brown eyes and brown skin. Majority of Men want a super attractive women that they see on the pornography they stream on their devices, on the Onlyfans account they subscribe to. The woman with blonde hair and blue eyes will always be seen as beautiful by society and men. Being black woman society just makes fun of our features.

Oh, I get it. I've been alone all my life, when it comes to romantic stuff..

Sure, I've had some times in which I've "dated" some people, but they never lasted for more than a few months, at best. And why do they always end? Me. Because being autistic? Being interested in cartoons and being childish and shit? That's... Not attractive. And I get it, I've come to peace with the fact that the dreams of 8 year old me of getting married an shit will never come to pass.

It's made making peace with suicide far easier. There's nothing to look foward to. I SPECIALLY don't look foward to the future considering how shit the world is getting. I rather die on my own terms than die by a nuke... Or heatstroke. Or a Earthquake or by getting fucking kidnapped and murdered as is so normal for women to die that way in my country.

I'm never leaving this place... Well, physically anyway.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that you have suffered so much in life. Life is just so unfair and disappointing and it is sad how many people live lives filled with pain. I hope that in whatever happens you find relief from what you are going through.

 

[absolute]

Ever since turning 25 years old and seeing women I grew up with getting married or having a serious relationships honestly has really broken me. Everyone is doing so well in life except me.

It is a painful reminder of how I was always that rejected girl at school while all other girls got boyfriends I feel so alone and I am ashamed that I am struggling at 25 years old. Everything in my life is a failure.

I am always going to be that rejected woman and nobody in this world really understands being single forever feels like . I don't feel even feel like a woman anymore because we are always told by society a girl,woman is beautiful and something to be desired but growing boys and never found me pretty like they did with the other girls at school. The boys at school thought I was werid because I correctly answered in class, had strong opinions on issues, fought back against the builles in the school. I struggle to fit in a lot. The girls at school excluded me from thier friendship groups, my university friends who were women also excluded me from thingsThe. I am too different that is the problem. I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal. Everyone has their 1st boyfriend as a teenager. Women can't relate to my life and I can't relate to theirs either. I was born a woman but I don't feel like one. I am starting to identify as non binary because of all this, I feel so disconnected from the gender I was born as and lonely.

I am average looking and got boring features which is black hair, brown eyes and brown skin. Majority of Men want a super attractive women that they see on the pornography they stream on their devices, on the Onlyfans account they subscribe to. The woman with blonde hair and blue eyes will always be seen as beautiful by society and men. Being black woman society just makes fun of our features.

Take your time and find the right partner because more than 60% of your friends will end up in divorce .

 

[hellispink]

it must be very difficult what you are going through. Remember, though, that most social media are fake. People post their best pictures, clothes, poses and happy times. However, most of them actually could be having miserable lives.

 

[nerve]

I've lost touch with just about everyone i knew growing up because of anxiety and to be honest, sometimes i am really grateful for that because it means i never hear about what old classmates are up to or whatever. I don't think I'd be able to handle that. It's hard enough to watch myself become this lonely, sad, frumpy spinster archetype without having to be reminded of all the things I don't have.

Im starting to notice actual physical signs of aging and im completely losing my mind over it. I wasted my best years being mentally ill and too scared to do anything or meet anyone. All I had going for me was that i was young and now even that's going away. Ending up like this was literally one of my worst nightmares.

 

[FireFox]

I can relate to you. I'm 22 almost 23 and my only relationships have been online. It makes me feel so ugly and like I'm going to be alone forever. I'm sorry this has happened to you. I wish I could give you some advice but just know you're not alone.

@I0stc4use Aww virtual hug and sending lots of love to you

it must be very difficult what you are going through. Remember, though, that most social media are fake. People post their best pictures, clothes, poses and happy times. However, most of them actually could be having miserable lives.

@hellispink nope it is not the social media I see some of the people I grew up because they live in the neighbourhood and area as me. I live in those neighbourhoods where there is the close knit communities and friendships. My neighbourhood is considered a suburb.

I am pretty much aware of how everyone else is doing as I see these people. Everyone is doing so much better than me and have done cool things since leaving school.

-One girl I went to school with she went to Oxford University, got a job in Pr and is married. She is only 26 years old.

-Another girl she attends the church I go to and also went to the same school as me. She is a teacher and is getting married soon. She is 25 years old.

The list is endless of women I know just doing so better than me.

I've lost touch with just about everyone i knew growing up because of anxiety and to be honest, sometimes i am really grateful for that because it means i never hear about what old classmates are up to or whatever. I don't think I'd be able to handle that. It's hard enough to watch myself become this lonely, sad, frumpy spinster archetype without having to be reminded of all the things I don't have.

Im starting to notice actual physical signs of aging and im completely losing my mind over it. I wasted my best years being mentally ill and too scared to do anything or meet anyone. All I had going for me was that i was young and now even that's going away. Ending up like this was literally one of my worst nightmares.

@nerve Mental illness has ruined so many lives. You deserved so much better.

All my friends live alone in their own homes and I still live with my parents. Other few friends too but majority of them are independent. I'm in my 30s and that makes me feel like a failure.

@BlackDays Virtual hug

The society we living in doesn't help either. If you are young and successful society puts you on a pedestal. It's impossible not to feel like sh*t when we are constantly bombarded of images of youth success especially within a person's teens and early 20s.

The worst thing is that I was someone who wanted to do so much with their lives and its disappointing how I turned out to be.

For me suicide is all about control, if I can not control my life I can choose how to do and the matter I leave this world. I don't want to see another decade anymore. I know I am dying in my 30s. I realise now my suicide is inevitable and finally accepted it. I don't belong here in this world and all my life struggled to fit in.

Relate. I do NOT want to hear about how old schoolmates are doing today, I go out of my way to avoid such information.

I keep saying this, but I want to reiterate. Race is irrelevant, in my opinion. The trait of attractiveness is found in every race, but is a privilege which only the few enjoy, no matter what race you're looking at. That's how it seems to me. And this rarity is something to lament, because it means that few win and most lose, in the game of attraction.

@Hidden Base

You're so lovely

As I grow older I notice race unfortunately plays a huge role in attraction and dating. Society doesn't see black girls as pretty even men of our own race don't even want us.

I went to a diverse school and I saw first hand how boys treated girls when it came to race. When I mention my experiences to people they get shocked they think what I experienced happens in a non diverse school only.

Growing up as teenager I saw how the black boys at school made fun of the black girls appearance whereas when it came to the white girls or other ethnic girls the boys would filrt them and be interested in them. There was one black boy in my class who made my life at school complete hell and I couldn't understand why as I never did anything bad to him. He made my life difficult because hated me because I was a black girl and he openly admitted he hates black girls.

As a teenager the boys I liked always were interested in girls who were white. At 15 I liked a Muslim boy who family was from Turkey, he was tall, brown and handsome. I meet him at an extracurricular activities club i did.I actually talked to him and even defended even when he got into trouble
He was always happy to be around this girl who had blonde hair and blue eyes and yes he always noticed her and it was clear he liked her. This girl wasn't even a nice person and actually hostilie towards me. All the boys admired her and liked her because she was pretty.

At 16 I liked this irish boy. At school break we talked to each other a lot and had fun. It turned out he was like everyone else in the school who thought I was werid, I thought he was different. He ended up a white girl who was more prettier than me and everyone in the school liked her

In adulthood the evidence is all, around me society doesn't see black women as pretty. Look at social media how open make fun of black women, British dating shows black women don't get picked or given attention like the other women in the show get from men etc

 

[Cosmic dust]

All my friends live alone in their own homes and I still live with my parents. Other few friends too but majority of them are independent. I'm in my 30s and that makes me feel like a failure.

I made a thread about moving out some time ago. I felt like you a lot of the time then I rented a house. Its a nice feeling to know you can survive just fine without other people, but the whole thing its a bit overrated.

Maybe I am exagerating, I may have a warped view of society because I don't go out much, but I am under the impression that many of these problems are agravated by internet, social media, smartphones and the current stage of capitalist. Like @FireFox said, people seem to have skewed beauty standards, actually not just for beauty, but for status and everything. People are also always comparing themselves to others, always worrying too much about what others will think. The most sociable people have social media accounts that works as an extent of their real lives, that are used not just for communication, but also to show off, to compare and to compete.

I don't know why I insist in mentioning these things on the forum, I don't know if I am getting anything right and these things probably doesn't help anyone. Maybe I am just nuts like some conspiracy guy, but the whole thing fascinates me somehow and I find this whole society, with their priorities and standards so fake and twisted.

 

[FireFox]

I made a thread about moving out some time ago. I felt like you a lot of the time then I rented a house. Its a nice feeling to know you can survive just fine without other people, but the whole thing its a bit overrated.

Maybe I am exagerating, I may have a warped view of society because I don't go out much, but I am under the impression that many of these problems are agravated by internet, social media, smartphones and the current stage of capitalist. Like @FireFox said, people seem to have skewed beauty standards, actually not just for beauty, but for status and everything. People are also always comparing themselves to others, always worrying too much about what others will think. The most sociable people have social media accounts that works as an extent of their real lives, that are used not just for communication, but also to show off, to compare and to compete.

I don't know why I insist in mentioning these things on the forum, I don't know if I am getting anything right and these things probably doesn't help anyone. Maybe I am just nuts like some conspiracy guy, but the whole thing fascinates me somehow and I find this whole society, with their priorities and standards so fake and twisted.

@Cosmic dust

No you are not a conspiracy guy , you are just a deep thinker and self aware individual. It's an amazing trait because people like you are a rarity.

It's not just social media we live in a culture that magnifies youth success especially within a person's teens and early 20s. If you are young and successful society puts you on a pedestal.There is no escaping this culture as it is all around us. Look we have up young people like AOC in America getting elected in to public office making our laws that is an amazing achievement, at family gathering or functions relatives within families love to show off, forces under 30 list, relatives within families brag how successful their young kids are and the list of all how society magnifies youth success is all around us.

Society is fake. I watched the movie interstellar and in the end the humans moved to planet Saturn as planet earth was inhabitable because of the duststorms and couldn't be saved anymore. Honestly watching the movie I thought the humans were selfish because moving to a new planet will not change them they are still the same selfish and fake humans. If humans in the future could move to a new planet they will still be used to their behaviour and toxic beliefs they had on Planet earth and carry on with that behaviour. The pandemic is proof how humans have learnt nothing once the pandemic died down everyone went back to normal. The pandemic was an opportunity for people to come together and create a better world that helped the vulnerable and the weak and more importantly fighting to make the system fair as the pandemic exposed how weak our institutions are in terms of healthcare systems, welfare systems, inequality in the education system as not every child has the resources to do remote learning ie family can't afford devices and wifi due to low income and the list goes on how broken our institutions are.

We could have used the pandemic to create a better and fairer world but nope people still carried on with their selfish and fake behaviour they did pre pandemic.

 

[Werewolf.]

I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal.

Sounds too good to be true. I am in the same boat as you, but proud of my "boring" features and brown skin. Finding a woman like you would be lovely. But they don't exist like that.

 

[Mimilade]

im not a woman so I can't relate
but what I can say is that every person I know who got married is really nobody you should look up to.
They are unhappy but are too stubborn to realize and accept it.
So in one way you are better than they are.

 

[HappyForever?]

I'm male but in the exact same situation. I suspect that relationships all come down to luck, whether it's genetics or meeting the right person at the right time. If you're unlucky there is little you can do. It is extremely painful being alone and undesirable, and that's why I'm seeking methods to commit suicide on this site. I hope you escape the loneliness soon.

 

[Gaga786]

I totally relate to your post. It just really hurts me seeing all of my cousins/peers excelling at life, while im failing tremendously. My cousins are all doing a marvellous job: taking care of their businesses,whereas im sitting at my home doing nothing. One of my cousin is a billionaire, his business was cited in Harvard University as a teaching example. My peers, who mostly bullied me are all doing well, they got in their dream universities. All of them have something to look forward to. Im not in a relationship, but I don't think ill ever be able to be in one, since Im gay and I live in a Muslim majority country.All of my cousins and peers will be able to get married eventually, except for me. It just sucks how I had to be the one who was born like that.

 

[Floofy Clouds]

Come on, girls. This is 2022. Didn't you get the memo?

Women are happier without children or a spouse, says happiness expert

I've been both long-term single and married. The happiest period of my life was when I lived alone in a tiny flat, just me and my cat. I wouldn't live with a man again.

Successful relationships are such a lottery. Sometimes having very good judgement is not enough. If you're unlucky, you could end up trapped, lonelier than when you were actually alone, with your freedoms and wings clipped, spending a large portion of your life in a state of irritation and be pressured and nagged into shit sex you don't want. You can make a choice to believe or not believe the lies society tells you about what you should be doing with your life.

I was a step-parent for a while and it was (secretly) horrendous - lonely, boring, irritating, draining, unfulfilling, thankless. And that was with perfectly fine kids who liked me. I know many parents, my peers, who think this of their own children too although it's fairly taboo to admit, although becoming less and less so now.

A rather interesting discussion thread from a UK parenting forum - *deep breath* I regret having children

Also, give it 10-15 years and more than half of those marriages you're seeing on social media will have ended in divorce.

Stop selling the dream to young girls that they "need" a man in their lives. 9/10 would be much happier with a cat, kindle, Netflix subscription and a cycling holiday in the Atlas Mountains with their friends.

 

[Nothingtoadd]

I'm also single never tried for a serious relationship as I can't even treat me better but never felt any kind of emotions seeing my married or engaged friends.I got a lot of freedom by not engaging in any relationship and I were ok before making a mess of peaceful life I had been living.

Ever since turning 25 years old and seeing women I grew up with getting married or having a serious relationships honestly has really broken me. Everyone is doing so well in life except me.

It is a painful reminder of how I was always that rejected girl at school while all other girls got boyfriends I feel so alone and I am ashamed that I am struggling at 25 years old. Everything in my life is a failure.

I am always going to be that rejected woman and nobody in this world really understands being single forever feels like . I don't feel even feel like a woman anymore because we are always told by society a girl,woman is beautiful and something to be desired but growing boys and never found me pretty like they did with the other girls at school. The boys at school thought I was werid because I correctly answered in class, had strong opinions on issues, fought back against the builles in the school. I struggle to fit in a lot. The girls at school excluded me from thier friendship groups, my university friends who were women also excluded me from thingsThe. I am too different that is the problem. I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal. Everyone has their 1st boyfriend as a teenager. Women can't relate to my life and I can't relate to theirs either. I was born a woman but I don't feel like one. I am starting to identify as non binary because of all this, I feel so disconnected from the gender I was born as and lonely.

I am average looking and got boring features which is black hair, brown eyes and brown skin. Majority of Men want a super attractive women that they see on the pornography they stream on their devices, on the Onlyfans account they subscribe to. The woman with blonde hair and blue eyes will always be seen as beautiful by society and men. Being black woman society just makes fun of our features.

Ever since turning 25 years old and seeing women I grew up with getting married or having a serious relationships honestly has really broken me. Everyone is doing so well in life except me.

It is a painful reminder of how I was always that rejected girl at school while all other girls got boyfriends I feel so alone and I am ashamed that I am struggling at 25 years old. Everything in my life is a failure.

I am always going to be that rejected woman and nobody in this world really understands being single forever feels like . I don't feel even feel like a woman anymore because we are always told by society a girl,woman is beautiful and something to be desired but growing boys and never found me pretty like they did with the other girls at school. The boys at school thought I was werid because I correctly answered in class, had strong opinions on issues, fought back against the builles in the school. I struggle to fit in a lot. The girls at school excluded me from thier friendship groups, my university friends who were women also excluded me from thingsThe. I am too different that is the problem. I am not normal 25 and virgin is not normal. Everyone has their 1st boyfriend as a teenager. Women can't relate to my life and I can't relate to theirs either. I was born a woman but I don't feel like one. I am starting to identify as non binary because of all this, I feel so disconnected from the gender I was born as and lonely.

I am average looking and got boring features which is black hair, brown eyes and brown skin. Majority of Men want a super attractive women that they see on the pornography they stream on their devices, on the Onlyfans account they subscribe to. The woman with blonde hair and blue eyes will always be seen as beautiful by society and men. Being black woman society just makes fun of our features.

You are a strong person with right attitude, you will find someone who truly understands you

 

[Symbiote]

I had always looked things differently when it came to people who I felt were better than me at relationships, job opportunities, and seem to go along with the normal flow of society. Everyone that you knew in HS or college, peaked in HS or college, or somewhere in their 20s. The best part of their lives are behind them. Ours either never started or just waiting in time.

 

[Trezzohno]

We're in the same boat Firefox. Am also 25 and the men I desire will never build a family with a girl like me. I was cheated out of romance hopefully in the afterlife we find it

 

[Journeytoletgo]

I made bad decisions by rushing into relationships with bad men, two online when I felt low and listening to everyone around me, and a one night stand out of alcoholism which was disgusting. I basically ruined my 20s messing with them. Now I'm 29 living at home still depressed out of shape, and don't know what I'm doing with my life. I should have CTB after HS but I didn't think of it religiously only to ruin myself being influenced by the people I hung around that were faster at life. Then when nice guys enter my life I ruined it through alcoholism and thinking I'm only good for sex. Hopefully ayahuasca can help me solve my self esteem issues, and traumas from childhood and ugliness during puberty if not I'll CTB before 35. As I failed socially, romantically.

 

[Funeralprincess]

Eh even the nice guys would've eventually abandoned you trust me. They're only nice until they realize you are sick and then they'll be out the door. It happened to me and many other mentally ill people. It's shitty having poor experiences in love, but it's even shittier when you get a good guy and he realizes you're too mentally ill, and he sees you as just something that make him even better for the next woman as he discards you.

 

[LonelyandAlone]

I am 38 years old and I have never been married and I don't have any children. I've never even been in a serious relationship. I am not ugly or anything. I just have so many mental issues. Depression, OCD, anxiety, panic attacks, social phobia, etc. I feel like a complete and total failure. My social life is non-existent. At the moment, my dear Mother is dying from cancer and i feel horrible. She was the only person in the world who really loved me and cared about me. I am scared, depressed, sad and suicidal. I have been suicidal on and off since I was 13 years old. But this time, everything is different. I am finally gonna do it after my Mother's death. Life is absolutely pointless and meaningless. My Mother left quite a lot of money for me and I am gonna spend the money before I go and then just do it. There is no choice. I have absolutely no desire to live in this world. I am all alone and lonely all the time.

 

[FireFox]

Eh even the nice guys would've eventually abandoned you trust me. They're only nice until they realize you are sick and then they'll be out the door. It happened to me and many other mentally ill people. It's shitty having poor experiences in love, but it's even shittier when you get a good guy and he realizes you're too mentally ill, and he sees you as just something that make him even better for the next woman as he discards you.

@mblum

What an arsehole. I am so sorry this happened to you. You deserved so much better. This is so NOT fair men demand and expect women to look after them when they fall sick as part "in sickness and in health" but they are the first to leave if a their girlfriend or wife becomes sick. It's so disgusting.