Robotic life. Worth it?

[Life_and_Death]

I can probably not ctb. But I can't see it not being robotic. It doesn't seem worth it. At least my loved ones will be "happy". Even that I'm not sure of though. I feel like everyone hates me. They say they don't but I feel like they do.

Idk.... Ctb feels like my last option, I just have too much eating away at me. I can't fix it. On an overall scale I can. But each little individual problem, that I can't do. There's too many. It would be like smashing a mirror into tiny pieces then putting it back together.

 

[fedupsoul]

Idk what to say?? Anti robotic life would be something different each day? That would be like a nomadic traveler life which not many can afford... life generally tends to be robotic. I don't do anything each day
I wake up drink coffee smoke eat lunch smoke drink tea smoke eat dinner and sleep, all the while checking out the painless ways to die
Most people pretty much stick to routine I guess. Life Really seems to be meaningless, people just distract themselves till they slowly rot away... I'm stuck up about what my family will have to face if I ctb and what unknown shit I might have to face after ctb.. my family is probably relying on me to be of some support for their future and people will generally look at you and treat you different if someone close to you has ctb.. I'm so confused and it's only fkn human to be facing this situation animals donot have a choice but to lead a robotic life I feel only our species can even realize this life is shit and come up with a way to fk outta here

 

[Deleted member 22624]

It's ok if you can avoid long stretches of feeling trapped, suffering. It just seems inevitable in life, we always get ill eventually don't we? But if you can manage to be robotic about picking up your pieces, you can just get it done. There is no spoon. Just dissociate like crap I guess

 

[Life_and_Death]

Just dissociate like crap I guess

Been there done that, scary af, do NOT advise.

Just... Robotic. Wake up, breakfast, water the flowers, do what ever project I'm working on. Just emotionally robotic going throughout the day. No different then now just keep more to myself emotionally and physically.

 

[WornOutLife]

I'm trying to do recovery but I'm getting closer and closer to a robotic life. It just doesn't make me happy so I kinda understand how you're feeling.
I dunno if I'll ctb or not but these months I'll try to have a robotic but also unpredictable life, full of adventures.

Hope you can find a solution and remember, you can always talk to me. You've been really supportive with me too. Thanks a bunch!

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[Life_and_Death]

I'm trying to do recovery but I'm getting closer and closer to a robotic life. It just doesn't make me happy so I kinda understand how you're feeling.
I dunno if I'll ctb or not but these months I'll try to have a robotic but also unpredictable life, full of adventures.

Hope you can find a solution and remember, you can always talk to me. You've been really supportive with me too. Thanks a bunch!

Hugs and love,

Matt

i dont really want to do either option. happily living would be nice. but i have fears and problems that pop up and out of the blue scream in my face "HI! HOW ARE YOU? REMEMBER ME?" then theres my general every day problems. i share with people. its something one kinda has to do if they want to get better but sharing just makes me feel worse because im too much for people. idk, ive been thinking i might force a "bad high" go to a therapist appointment and blurt out whatever my brain thinks. (obviously i would have discussed this with the therapist before doing it lol.)

also thnx im glad i could help someone one at least a little bit :)

 

[EmbraceOfTheVoid]

As someone that's spent essentially their entire life as a lifeless doll and just going through the motions to tolerate existing then I'd say no, it's not worth it. Your circumstances are different from mine however and only you can accurately judge your own situation.

 

[Makko]

Robotic life isn't the same as a life under active torture, so there's no real damage in giving it a shot. There might be potential for something unexpected changing your life for the better and making you discover something in yourself that you didn't know you had. The world is weird.

 

[Jarni]

Why absolutely robotic? Job, maybe.. But the free time after job and week-ends ? It is up to you to give it sense and be creative to make your life poetic, surprising, full of adventures.

 

[Pookie]

Sorry you're feeling this way. Hugs.

In some ways I feel like a robot, I'm basically just on autopilot. But I can't carry on feeling like a robot forever. Some day this robot is going to be flipping the OFF switch.

I'm trying to do recovery but I'm getting closer and closer to a robotic life. It just doesn't make me happy so I kinda understand how you're feeling.
I dunno if I'll ctb or not but these months I'll try to have a robotic but also unpredictable life, full of adventures.

Hope you can find a solution and remember, you can always talk to me. You've been really supportive with me too. Thanks a bunch!

Hugs and love,

Matt

I still have hope for you that you won't be a zombie forever and that one day you'll feel human again.

 

[MindFrog]

That's actually how I spent my college life, since I never really had any ambition in life.. I just followed the list my mom had for me.. Eat, go to school, study, sleep.. I almost didnt have anytime to have fun..

It's... Ok i guess. You can spend your life that way if you ignore some of your desires. I felt content with that life. Although, you have to focus on a end goal too.. and never compare your life with those more fulfilling.

I just stopped when realize I was doing it for people with didnt really care for my wellbeing.. Guess I got disillusioned.. It's probably better if I didnt wake up. I want to take the blue pill if I still can..

 

[*Hope*]

I say it's worth to keep living if robotic life is the thing that makes you wanna ctb. You have a potential, a small chance to change you're life, which already is a huge plus.

P.s. Theres a funny story of a guy who wanted to commit suicide due to a boring life, but before ctb, he left his country and decided to party hard with drugs, booze and women till he od's.
He enjoyed the parties so much he decided to keep living