Venting resisting the urge to jump

[AmanSilvers]

In my area there is a 100+ metre high bridge over water that I see relatively often. There is nothing stopping anyone from jumping off it, besides some signs and stickers that nicely ask people to not do so. It is incredibly difficult to keep my mind off it. Sometimes I'll walk across it and drop a rock off the side. A long time ago I had planned to end it that way, but when I stood at the edge, grabbing the railing, I realized I am way too big of a wimp to do it. The stones take so long to fall and all I can imagine is how much longer it would feel if it was me in my final moments. Can it even be considered a failed attempt if I barely tried.

I am worried that when I inevitably tell a therapist about this it will get misinterpreted as being more severe than it actually is, but I guess I will face that when I get there. I will be seeing a new therapist soon and hopefully they will be better than the others I've had.

I wonder if fish would nibble on me if I went that way. I bet I would taste bad.

 

[timf]

From a physics standpoint taller is not necessarily more lethal. Because of air resistance the human body does not keep falling faster and faster, 100 mph is approximately the top speed. The angle one hits as well as the surface impact characteristics greatly determine if one is killed or significantly injured. Some spinal injuries result in paralysis.

A person can imagine something and have it become so attractive that they act on it only to discover that they have an outcome they didn't expect. You might want to tell your new therapist about your thoughts so that you might be helped to not let those thoughts grow out of proportion.