Venting Rehab

[LucifersIntrovert]

Since going to rehab last year because of my personal choices, people in my family now no longer see me as a human being. I was sent in around early July last year. Since being there I was no longer a part of my family from the looks of it. My mother said that she would keep it between her and my father (they are divorced) but she then proceeded to tell her side of the family. I didn't realize it until a friend of mine was talking to my younger brother at school. (After I graduated high school) and my brother said he was disappointed in my because of why I was sent there. Keep in mind he shouldn't have known that I was there… until I asked my mom and she tried to apologize but I will never forgive her. Don't get me wrong I still love her… but even for $10,000,000 I will never trust or forgive her. But it's not only that. Now my family treats me like an enemy. For instance when we occasionally eat out together as a family or eat all together at our dinning room table sometimes they won't say a word to me or about me until I leave. Then they go to chatting like they were just talking for hours before hand, but not only that they sh!T talk me behind my back as I heard my grandparents just yesterday talking about how I was the fuck up and how my parents still love me after everything. But I can tell they don't, I'm no longer trusted around anything or anyone, I can't drive alone, I have to be supervised with a knife, I have to be watched as I take my meds I'm practically in a psych ward at this point. But either way I'm just trying to find a way to CTB as this is all just a cycle that I'm trying to end.

 

[Larysa]

This is so horrible. I'm sorry.

Presumably it was rehab for addiction?

 

[LucifersIntrovert]

This is so horrible. I'm sorry.

Presumably it was rehab for addiction?

Make it long story short, I bought weed for the first time because after 8 years of feeling suicidal and changing my anti depressants 4 times to no avail. Naturally I wanted to feel another way… soooooo I shared with some of my friends I had known for 6 years and one of them didn't like how he felt after begging me for some so he snitched and I had to call my parents and then that's why I got sent to rehab "for legal reasons" and not my 8 years of cutting and suicidal ideation because it would've looked better in court if it got taken there. Like I was placed with everyone else that did drugs and made friends with a lot of cool people surprisingly. But still I was treated like I was doing meth and heroin. Like I was so lost when I talked to these two girls and they mentioned that one of them was coming down from meth (she was 6 days sober at the time) and the other was still on Xanax. It blew my mind how I was there for reasons that didn't help me whatsoever. ( I was never put anywhere else I was there July-November 2022)

 

[Larysa]

Goodness, it's hard to understand such a disproportionate reaction. Isn't cannabis legal in California?

 

[LucifersIntrovert]

Goodness, it's hard to understand such a disproportionate reaction. Isn't cannabis legal in California?

It is but I was underaged at the time

 

[Larysa]

That's just so incredibly hard on you. Can you see a way forward away from your family?

 

[LucifersIntrovert]

Genuinely don't know I just don't expect to make it much longer it's just acceptance at this point