I dont 'know' if that 'thing' is actually even 'real'/'legit' or whatever the fuck those 'words' fcking mean or not nor if it actually 'works' or it doesnt but anyways I fucking 'envy' or whatever the goddamn fuck that 'word'/'verb' fucking means those who can buy it and have it (or SN and/or basically any other 'reliable'/'guaranteed' method/way out in general) so fucking damn fucking much. [****]How much I fucking wish or whatever the fuck that 'word'/'verb' fcking means I had the fucking 'money' that 'thing' fucking costs and that i could fucking 'buy' it. (if it actually 'worked' or whatever the damn fuck that even means but 'according' to what its 'said' in 'posts' 'above', it 'most' 'likely' and FUCKING UNFORTUNATELY fucking doesnt and is just another 'scam' or whatever the fuck that 'word' even fucking means, what a goddamn fucking crap then. i FUCKING wish it fcking actually 'worked' and that it was as 'quick' and 'reliable' as it 'claims' or whatever the fuck that 'verb'/'word' means to be in the 'video'. [and that i could fucking actually 'bUy'/have it, which I FUCKING UNFORTUNATELY wouldnt be fucking 'aBlE' to, even if that 'thing' actually was 'cheaper' or whatever the fuck that means and it 'worked'/was 'legit' or whatever the damn fuck that 'word'/'adjective' fucking means too, because i DoNt 'WoRk' [and DONT fcking wAnT tO/DONT wAnT tO wAnT tO never have had never at fucking damn all ever fcking will no fcking 'matter' fcking what lmfao] or whatever the damn fuck that fucking godd bullshit trash garbage crap fcking even means/is aNd DoNt HaVe the fucking 'mOnEy' for it. fuck what a goddamn fucking garbage bullshit trash crap rubbish damn shit or whatever the fuck all those 'words' even fucking mean that I fcking literally just fcking have no damn fucking choice but to fcking make the fucking 'eFfOrT' shit to fcking 'wOrK'/hAvE 'mOnEy' and all that fcking goddamn bullshit garbage crap shit if i want to have a reliable way out ["WAY OUT" TO ETERNAL ABSOLUTE COMPLETE LITERAL TOTAL INFINITE ENDLESS LIMITLESS PLAIN PURE NOTHINGNESS/NONEXISTENCE!!!!!!!!!!]/method and FUCKING FINALLY BE 'ABLE' TO FUCKING FINALLY NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ALL because all the methods that are 'reliable'/'guaranteed' [and 'relatively' or whatever the fuck that means 'quick' and 'painless'. i dont give a damn shit if it has some 'pain' 'involved' or whatever the fuck all those 'words' even fucking mean BUT IT HAS TO BE RELIABLE AND QUICK AT LEAST, I DONT FCKING WANT TO FCKING 'RISK' BEING FCKING 'FOUND' AND BEING FCKING 'SENT' TO A FCKING 'HOSPITAL'/'PSYCH WARD' AND FCKING 'WATCHED' {ON 'sUiCiDe WaTcH'} AT ALL] and that have a 'high'/very 'high' 'success' 'rate', fcking 'cost' 'money' or whatever the damn fuck that fcking crap even fucking means/is, because they fucking 'require' 'materials'/'preparation' and all that fucking bullshit garbage crap shit and *some are extremely 'risky' to 'buy'/have and are very 'expensive' (for example N, 'opiates'/'opioids' or whatever the fuck that even fucking means/is and however the fuck the 'words' are fucking written like F, H etc) 'unless' its for example SN which isnt as 'expensive' or whatever the dn fuck that 'word'/'adjective' fcking even means at all as N but it fcking 'requires' so many fucking 'steps'/'preparation' or whatever the fuck that fucking means like for example the fcking 'fasting' [[**i just cant do that in my 'parent's' 'house' at all without being 'suspicious'/'raising' any 'suspicion', i dont 'lIvE' 'alone'. I cant 'say' that there arent any 'reasons' at all why i dont 'eat', they wOuLdNt 'bElIeVe' or whatever the goddamn fuck shit that fucking means and would fcking ask me "wHy"/fOr A rEaSoN anyways since for every fucking one there fucking has to fucking be a fucking goddamn 'reason' for every fucking thing and 'obviously' i WOULDNT 'tell' them the 'truth' so theyd 'assume' whatever the fuck or 'directly' just not 'let' me not fucking 'eat' anything at all. its just 'impossible' to fucking do that fucking 'rEqUiReD'/'nEeDeD' 'sTeP' shit for the fucking sn method 'here' in this 'house' because im not alone, if the 'hours' kept 'passing by' and i kept not 'eating' anything theyd 'eventually' 'suspect' a lot and any fucking ways i wouldnt be 'allowed' or whatever the fuck that even fucking means to not 'eat' anything at all. and theyd 'probably' 'start' making 'questions' like "bUt WhY YoU oUt oF a SuDdEn DoNt EaT aBsOlUtElY aNyThInG? wHaT hApPeNs To YoU/wHaTs 'wRoNg' wItH yOu?" And or whatever other fcking crap bullshit like that. the fucking 'method' requires 8 'hours' (some have even 'said' 24 hours) of the fucking 'fast' 'step'/'requirement' shit for the sn to get 'absorbed' much much 'faster'/for DEATH to happen 'faster'. jesus fucking damn christ why the fuck its so fucking damn hard to FUCKING FINALLY NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ABSOLUTE ALL NEVER AT ALL FOR FUCKS FUCKING SAKE WHY???????!!!!!!!!!!!! **Theyd 'suspect' a lot]] 'rEqUiReMeNt' shit and all that fcking bullshit if i want to 'ensure' that it'll completely/totally 'kill' me and if i want it to be faster (because 'apparently' if i dont 'fast' the 'process' until DEATH/NOTHINGNESS/NONEXISTENCE is much much 'longer'/'slower' and all that fucking crap) to not fcking 'risk' getting fcking 'caught' because of the 'noise' of 'vomiting' and or because of taking so much fucking 'long' to fucking finally entirely kill me and be out of the fucking 'possibility' of being fucking 'found' and FUCKING 'UNFORTUNATELY' "sAvEd" and all that fcking goddamn crap, *and fucking 'require' a lot of fucking 'materials' to fucking have/'buy', a lot of fucking 'preparation', a lot of fucking 'tImE' 'fRaMe' to not 'risk' being fucking 'found at all, a lot of fucking 'planning', 'eFfOrT', some 'even' fucking 'require' 'tEcHnIcAl'/'cHeMiStRy' or whatever the fuck those 'words' mean 'sKiLlS'/'kNoWlEdGe' or whatever the fuck that fucking garbage crap even fcking means too (ewwww why the damn fuck do i have to fcking want to have all that fcking goddamn shit lmfao) for it to 'work' and not fucking 'risk' 'brain damage' (exit bag, Nitrogen, inert gas etc) (i wouldnt give a damn shit if i had "brain damage" or whatever the fuck that even fcking means lmfao that wouldnt ""aFfEcT"'/""wOrRy"' "me" at all, i couldnt give any less of a fucking shit about any fucking 'brain'/'mind' in general or whatever the fuck that shit even fcking is/means lmfao. but i want to 'avoid' that to not 'traumatize'/'shock'/'hurt' or whatever the fuck those 'words'/'verbs' mean my 'parents'/'family') and or blah blah blah whatever other fucking garbage trash bullshit crap shit like that in general. its so FUCKING DAMN FUCKING 'FRUSTRATING' all the fucking shit that i have no goddamn fuck to fucking 'dO' {*} [[[fucking 'tHiNk'/fucking 'uSe' the fucking piece of FCKING 'meat' called "bRaIn", 'move'/'use' the fucking flesh/carcass/meat suit, make fucking 'eFfOrTs' or whatever the fuck that fcking means with the fcking 'pRePaRaTiON', 'pLaNnInG', 'sTePs', being 'cArEfUl' to not get fcking 'caught' at all, dOiNg the fucking method 'wElL' 'step' by fucking 'step' and with all the fucking shit that 'requires' to mAkE sUrE that it wont fucking 'fail' or whatever the fuck that means, make fucking sure that i have fucking 'enough' 'time' for the attempt etc. its so damn fucking frustrating all the fucking shit that id have to fucking 'dO' jfc. i fucking wish i could just 'jump' but there arent any 'tall' 'buildings' 'here' at all anyway, 'everything' is 'houses' and they have a very low height, its impossible to die from it, i 'guess' the 'height' from the houses is like the 'height' of a 'second' 'floor', 'maximum'. The only ""tall"" building [and it isnt 'tall' 'enough' at all to die] would be the 'hospital' but its just 'impossible' to go 'there' and 'climb' to the fucking 'roof' or whatever the fuck that even is/means. i wouldnt 'know' how to fucking 'access' to it without being 'suspicious' at all and anyways there are always 'many' 'people' 'there', and there are 'security' 'guards' or whatever the fuck that is/means at 'night' too, and well 'now' with this "covid" thing [that i couldnt give any damn fucking less of a goddamn fuck shit about and doesnt ""aFfEcT""/""wOrRy"" mE at all and NEVER will lmfao, neither any "pandemic"/"virus" nor any "lockdown"/"restrictions" or whatever the fuck all that is/means lmao] i 'guess' [i dont give a damn shit lmao] that there are more 'people' there more 'often'. so well i cant 'choose' the 'jumping' 'method' at all, there isnt anything in this 'place'/'town' or however the fuck to fucking call it that would be 'high' 'enough' for a 'guaranteed' death. and well i 'guess' that i just have no choice but to fucking 'consider' or whatever the fuck that means that my 'parents'/'siblings'/'family' or whatever the fuck all that means, would be vErY/eXtReMeLy/iMmEnSeLy/uTtErLy or whatever the fuck those 'words' even mean 'tRaUmAtIzEd'/'sHoCkEd'/'dEvAsTaTeD'/'hUrT', 'crying' a lot and blahblahblah and that theyd want a 'funeral' for me and a 'viewing' and blahblah all that crap so itd be 'better' to 'use' a lEsS 'tRaUmAtIc' or whatever tf that means way out/method so its fucking possible for them to have the fucking 'viewing' of the body without being 'so' 'shocking'/'traumatizing' for them and blahblahblah]]] {*} TO FUCKING FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET THE FUCK OUT OF|DITCH|LEAVE|GET RID OF THE FUCKING MEAT FLESH CAPSULE VESSEL CARCASS SHIT CALLED "HUMAN BODY"/"BODY" OR WHATEVER THE FUCK "HUMAN BODIES"/"BODIES" IN GENERAL ARE I JUST DONT GIVE A DAMN SHIT LMFAO AND FUCKING FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND DIE/NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ALL/LITERALLY JUST NOT 'BE' ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY COMPLETELY DEFINITELY UTTERLY ANYTHING ANYONE ANY DAMN FUCKING 'WAY'/'TYPE'/'FORM'/'SPECIES'/'BEING'/'GENDER'/'AGE' NOR ETCETCETC ANYWHERE ETCETCETCETC IN GENERAL AT DAMN ABSOLUTE TOTAL FUCKING ALL. how fucking much i fucking wish i could just 'disappear' instantly/immediately and fucking finally leave/get the fuck out of/get 'rid' of the fucking flesh meat capsule carcass sheath and the fucking piece of 'meat' shit called "human body"/"body" and "brain"/"mind" or whatever the fuck all that in general is/whatever the fuck its fucking called and fucking finally NOT 'exist' in general at damn fucking all/NOT 'be' absolutely literally totally completely basically ANYTHING ANYONE ANY DAMN FCKING 'WAY' ETC ANYWHERE ETCETCETCETC in general at absolute total damn fcking all WITHOUT fucking having to fucking 'mOvE' the fcking bag of flesh/sheath/shell/meat suit shit at all in absolutely any damn fcking 'way' at all in any fcking 'direction' at all any fcking type/kind of fucking 'movement' at fcking all nor fcking 'using' absolutely literally basically totally any fcking 'part' of the 'body' in general atwll etcetc, NOR fcking having to fcking 'dO'/'tHiNk' etcetcetc ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY UTTERLY ANYTHING AT ALL. NOTHING!!!!!!!! FOR FUCKS SAKE I LITERALLY JUST DONT FUCKING WANT [NEVER at all have had, NEVER at all ever fcking will NO fcking 'matter' fcking what] TO FUCKING 'DO'/'THINK' ETC [NOR literally absolutely any fcking other fcking 'action'/'verb' in general etc in general at all of any type] ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY COMPLETELY DEFINITELY UTTERLY ENTIRELY EXACTLY PRACTICALLY SIMPLY FCKING ANYTHING IN GENERAL AT ALL. A N Y T H I N G. WHATEVER/HOWEVER THE FCK IT IS/CAN BE OF ANY FCKING TYPE/KIND/WAY ETC. NO FCKING 'MATTER' WHAT THE FUCK ITS FCKING RELATED TO/ABOUT/ASSOCIATED WITH ETCETC. NOTHING AT ALL FOR FUCKS SAKE. why the goddamn shit fuck do "I" fcking have to jesus damn fcking christ
Fuck how fcking much i fcking wish I DIDNT fcking have to 'dO' that fucking garbage bullshit (to 'wOrK') and that i didnt have to fucking 'nEeD' 'mOnEy' nor any other fucking goddamn crap like that/in general and that i could FUCKING FINALLY DIE/NOT 'EXIST' AT ALL/GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE FUCKING 'FLESH' 'PRISON' 'MEAT' 'CARCASS' 'SACK' SHIT/'DISAPPEAR' ENTIRELY TOTALLY COMPLETELY DEFINITELY UTTERLY WHOLLY FULLY LITERALLY ETERNALLY FOREVER AND FUCKING FINALLY NOT "BE" ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY COMPLETELY DEFINITELY UTTERLY ENTIRELY EXACTLY PRACTICALLY WHOLLY FULLY SERIOUSLY SIMPLY JUST FUCKING ANYTHING ANYONE ANYWHERE ETCETCETC IN ABSOLUTE TOTAL LITERAL GENERAL AT DAMN FUCKING ALL without fucking having to fucking 'tHiNk'/'pLaN'/'pRePaRe'/'dO'/'rIsK' {nor absolutely any fcking other goddamn bullshit trash fuck damn shit crap//nor any other fucking 'action'/'verb' in general etcetc} ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY COMPLETELY ANYTHING IN GENERAL AT FUCKING GODDAMN FUCKING ALL. FFFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKKK ITS SO FUCKING DAMN GODDAMN FUCKING 'FRUSTRATING' HOW FUCKING 'HARD' IT IS TO DIE/NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ALL JESUS DAMN FUCKING CHRIST IT FUCKING 'GIVES' ME SO DAMN FUCKING MUCH 'IMPOTENCE', what a fucking goddamn garbage bullshit trash crap fuck damn shit that i fucking have to fucking 'uSe'/'bUy'/'hAvE' 'mAtErIaLs' or whatever the fuck that even fcking is/means and that to FUCKING FINALLY JUST LITERALLY NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ALL i have no goddamn fucking 'choice' but to fucking 'tHiNk' and mAkE a FUCKING 'eFfOrT' and 'risk' a lot of fucking shit like being fcking 'sent' to a fcking 'hospital'/'psych ward', being on fcking 'sUiCiDe WaTcH', not having any more 'opportunities' to ATTEMPT/TRY TO FUCKING FINALLY NOT 'EXIST' AT ALL again and all that fucking crap. and theres the fucking 'high' 'risk' of all that shit, getting fucking 'caught' and being fucking 'sent' to a fucking 'hospital'/'psych ward' and then being on fucking 'sUiCiDe WaTcH' and all that goddamn fucking bullshit garbage trash trap fuck damn shit because i dont 'lIvE' 'alone' {{AND I JUST DONT FUCKING WANT TO FUCKING 'bEcOmE'/'bE' 'iNdEpEnDeNt' or whatever the fuck that """pOsItIvE""" goddamn bullshit crap even fcking means lmfao and as if i gave a damn fuck shit if its """pOsItIvE"""/"""gOoD""" or """nEgAtIvE"""/"""bAd""" or whatever tf those 'words'/'adjectives'be even fcking mean too or however the damn fuck lmfaooooooo i just fcking couldnt give any less of a damn shit NOR LITERALLY ANY FCKING OTHER FCKING """""pOsItIvE""""" 'wAy/'aDjEcTivE'/'tRaIt'/tYpE oF 'pErSoN'/'tHiNg'/GODDAMN DAMN FCKING GARBAGE BULLSHIT TRASH CRAP FUCK DAMN SHIT LIKE THAT IN GENERAL AT ALL NOR IN GENERAL AT ALL. I LITERALLY JUST DONT FCKING WANT (NEVER AT ALL HAVE NEVER WILL AT ALL NO FCKING 'MATTER' WHAT) AT ALL TO FCKING 'wOrK' OR WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT FCKING GARBAGE TRASH CRAP BULLSHIT EVEN IS/MEANS EW LMFAO TO FCKING HAVE A GODDAMN FUCKING 'hOuSe'/'aPaRtMeNt' OR WHATEVER TF THAT EVEN FUCKING MEANS/IS NOR HAVE TO FUCKING 'WAIT' FOR 'WHO' THE DAMN FUCK 'KNOWS' HOW FCKING MANY FCKING 'YEARS' 'UNTIL' I CAN FUCKING FINALLY FCKING 'HAVE'/'BUY' THE GODDAMN FCKING 'HOUSE'/'APARTMENT' SHIT AND I CAN FUCKING FINALLY "SUCCESSFULLY"/"RELIABLY"/"SAFELY" 'ATTEMPT'/"CTB"/DIE/NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ALL "WITHOUT ANY" 'RISKS' AT ALL, I JUST DONT FCKING WANT TO FCKING 'wOrK' EEWW LMFAO NOR HAVE TO FCKING 'WAIT' FOR 'SO' 'MANY' FUCKING 'YEARS' FOR FUCKS SAKE I JUST FCKING DONT} FUCK ITS SO DAMN FUCKING FRUSTRATING] FOR FUCKS SAKE WHY THE FUCK IS IT SO DAMN FUCKING HARD TO FUCKING FINALLY DIE/DISAPPEAR/NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ALL FOR FUCKS DAMN FUCKING SAKE FUCKING WHY???????!!!!!!!!! FUCK. ITS SO DAMN FUCKING 'FRUSTRATING'!!!!!!!!!!! WHY THE DAMN FUCK IS "THIS" IN GENERAL A DAMN FUCKING 'OBLIGATION'/'OBLIGATORY' 'THING' WHY THE GODDAMN FUCK CANT I JUST LITERALLY SIMPLY TRULY JUST DONT/NOT FUCKING 'WANT' ETC/DONT WANT TO FCKING 'WANT' ETCETCBLAHBLAH ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY COMPLETELY DEFINITELY UTTERLY ANYTHING IN ABSOLUTE TOTAL LITERAL GENERAL AT DAMN GODDAMN FCKING ALL WHATEVER HOWEVER IT IS/CAN BE OF ANY TYPE/WAY ETC FROM/ABOUT/RELATED TO/OF/ASSOCIATED WITH ETCETCETC ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY COMPLETELY DEFINITELY ENTIRELY EXACTLY UTTERLY PRACTICALLY ANYTHING IN GENERAL AT DAMN FUCKING ALL ETC AND THAT'S FCKING LITERALLY IT WITHOUT ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY ANY SINGLE FCKING GODDAMN 'REASONS'/'CAUSES'/'FACTORS'/'EXPLANATIONS' NOR BLAHBLAHETCETC IN GENERAL AT ALL OF LITERALLY ANY SINGLE FCKING TYPE IN GENERAL AT DAMN ALL FOR FUCKS SAKE FUCKING WHY????????!!!!!!!!!!)
[****] I'd definitely have immediately 'done' it already if i had the fucking money* (but to fcking have 'mOnEy' or whatever the damn fuck that bullshit crap fcking is/means for that and be fucking 'aBlE' to fucking buy that thing THAT I CAN FUCKING FINALLY NOT 'EXIST' AT ALL WITH, I would [FUCKING 'UNFORTUNATELY', I FUCKING 'WISH' OR WHATEVER TF THAT MEANS I FUCKING DIDNT FCKING HAVE TO] fcking have literally no damn fcking choice but to fucking 'wOrK'/gEt A 'jOb'/hAvE a 'pRoFeSsIoN' or whatever the goddamn fuck all that fucking bullshit garbage shit trash crap [or whatever the fuck those 'words' even mean] fcking even means ew lmfao so i can fucking have the fcking 'money' that thing I CAN FUCKING FINALLY DIE/JUST LITERALLY NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT DAMN ALL WITH fucking 'costs'. and I just DONT fcking want to NOR want to want to at all for fucks sake [to 'work' or whatever the damn fuck that fcking goddamn bullshit garbage trash crap fuck damn shit fcking even means/is], NEVER have wanted NEVER at all ever fcking will NO fcking 'matter' what, NEITHER to 'wOrK' NOR 'sTuDy' nor absolutely basically totally literally ANYTHING fcking else in general at all whatever/however it is/can be etc of any type/way etc. NEITHER from/about/related to "rEsPoNsIbIlItIeS"/"dUtIeS"/"oBlIgAtIoNs"/"tAsKs"/"mUsT-dO tHiNgS" or whatever the damn fuck all that fucking garbage shit crap fcking is/means NOR from/about/related to/associated with etc "lEiSuRe"/"hObBiEs"/"eNjOyMeNt"/"eNtErtAiNmEnT"/"pLeAsUrE"/"aMuSeMeNt"/"iNtErEsTs" or whatever the goddamn fuck all that fucking damn shit crap bullshit means/is too lmfao. NOR related to/about etc absolutely literally basically totally ANYTHING else in general at all, NOTHING FOR FUCKS DAMN SAKE, N O T H I N G. I just literally fcking DONT and thats fcking it never at all have fucking wanted and NEVER at all ever fcking will NO 'matter' what for fucks sake) *and lived alone/had 'oWn' 'hOuSe'/'aPaRtMeNt' or whatever the fuck that crap even fucking means/is. Thats for sure. I wouldnt fucking 'wait' at all and would quickly fucking 'pay'/give the fucking money for it and wait for it to 'arrive' as 'soon' as possible and then immediately "ctb" ("catch" the "bus" to eternal absolute total infinite plain pure literal endless permanent complete limitless NOTHINGNESS/NONEXISTENCE/OBLIVION. NOT to ANY fucking "sOmEthIng"/"tHiNg"/"aFtErLiFe"/"lIfE aFtEr DeAtH" etc shit at all lmfao) with it as soon as i finally get it. Id fucking finally put the fucking mask on and attempt with it (to FUCKING FINALLY GET THE DAMN FUCK OUT OF/LEAVE/GET 'RID' OF THE FUCKING 'FLESH' 'SHELL'/'CARCASS'/'CAPSULE' 'PRISON' SHIT AND THE FUCKING 'PIECE' OF FUCKING 'MEAT' CALLED 'bRaIn' AND FUCKING FINALLY NOT 'EXIST' IN GENERAL AT ALL) right immediately/instantly after 'receiving'/getting it 'delivered' it without absolutely any "doubt" at all. FUCKKKKKKK i fucking wish it wasnt so damn fucking hard to FUCKING FINALLY die/NOT 'exist' in absolute general at damn fucking all/'disappear' entirely absolutely completely totally utterly definitely literally FOREVER and FUCKING FINALLY NOT 'be' absolutely literally basically totally completely ANYTHING ANYONE ANYWHERE ETCETCETC IN GENERAL AT DAMN FUCKING ALL, if it wasnt so damn fucking hard and risky and I lIvEd alone i definitely wouldnt "be" "here" (nor anywhere else in general at all) anymore/i definitely wouldve already "ctb" (to NOTHINGNESS/NONEXISTENCE, NOT to ANY fucking "sOmEtHiNg"/"tHiNg"/"aFtErLiFe"/"lIfE aFtEr DeAtH" etc shit in general AT ALL whatever/however the fuck "it" is/can be etc of any type/form/way etc, neither "physical"/"material"/"tangible" etc nor "nonphysical"/"immaterial"/"intangible" etc) and wouldve already been GONE and NOTHING at all many years ago/a very long time 'ago'. FUCK it's so damn fucking frustrating or whatever the fuck that 'word' means how fucking hard it fucking is to FUCKING FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT 'EXIST' IN ABSOLUTE GENERAL AT DAMN ALL/NOT 'EXPERIENCE'|'BE PART' OF|'PARTICIPATE' IN|'KNOW' ABOUT|'DO' ETCETCETC ABSOLUTELY LITERALLY BASICALLY TOTALLY ANYTHING IN GENERAL AT ALL, jesus damn fucking christ