Help please i dont know what this is i dont know whats wrong with me

[lovelulu]

Starting yesterday i started having major hysterical breakdowns stemming from a bunch of stuff with just myself and my fp. Today its gotten ten times worse and im so, so twitchy, I havent stopped crying, keep on screaming, etc. Im filled with so much fucking frustration and even typing this i just want to break my fucking phone and dsmassshshs my head in I wanna hang myself so bad I cant I donr know I need to so bad I want to I wanna leave this place I dont wanna be here im actually terrified I dont know whats going on with me I've never been this bad before I justx got so mad rigjt now while typing this i started lashing out and screaming oh my god I feel like im faking but im not i feel like im being riducled by everyone I feel like some god up fhere or whatever is laughing at me I need to get out of my body right now I feel so stuck and im so scared Im terrified it hurts so mych my heart my mind Im so mad im so furious im so sad please I wish someone could help me I wish I could help myself please help me this is so corny and stupid and retarded but this is genuine im I dont know whats wrong please I just need help I know I sound retarded im just I feel so trapped I need help please

 

[Fadenself00_]

I'm so sorry ;(
Have you recently had any med change or anything like that? This reminds me of my side effects/withdrawl with an SSRI

 

[lovelulu]

I'm so sorry ;(
Have you recently had any med change or anything like that? This reminds me of my side effects/withdrawl with an SSRI

I haven't took my meds in about 3 days, but its never done such a drastic affect on me like this

 

[Fadenself00_]

I haven't took my meds in about 3 days, but its never done such a drastic affect on me like this

Are those meds SSRIs? Then it is 99% the meds. Never abprubtly stop taking them.. Also did they even benefit you in the first place? (especially in regards to SSRIs)? From my experience they are just blunting/weird garbage and withdrawl symptoms are just like you described.

 

[lovelulu]

Are those meds SSRIs? Then it is 99% the meds. Never abprubtly stop taking them.. Also did they even benefit you in the first place? (especially in regards to SSRIs)? From my experience they are just blunting/weird garbage and withdrawl symptoms are just like you described.

Yep, they were SSRIs. I've always stopped taking them abruptly at times before taking them again because they never really did anything to benefit me. The only reason i would take them again is because of the physical withdrawal symptoms ( like brain zaps especially) rather than mental. Im just a bit suprised me not taking them would affect me this badly.

 

[Fadenself00_]

Yep, they were SSRIs. I've always stopped taking them abruptly at times before taking them again because they never really did anything to benefit me. The only reason i would take them again is because of the physical withdrawal symptoms ( like brain zaps especially) rather than mental. Im just a bit suprised me not taking them would affect me this badly.

Seems like your brain is already way more sensitive now... As someone horribly damaged by psych drugs, this is a very serious warning sign.. I would personally recommend you to plan and not take those(and preferably no) psych drug anymore if it's not absolutely necessary

As for your current withdrawl symptoms, there is a good chance that it will take longer than a year for these ups and downs to be fizzled out.. I guess you could slowly reinstate(don't just take a normal dose now though, more like 1/2 of a normal dose, because paradoxically your symptoms might briefly get way worse otherwise, which can put you at major risk of an SSRI-crash (also known as a "PSSD-crash" in the med damage community)..

 

[lovelulu]

Seems like your brain is already way more sensitive now... As someone horribly damaged by psych drugs, this is a very serious warning sign.. I would personally recommend you to plan and not take those(and preferably no) psych drug anymore if it's not absolutely necessary

As for your current withdrawl symptoms, there is a good chance that it will take longer than a year for these ups and downs to be fizzled out.. I guess you could slowly reinstate(don't just take a normal dose now though, more like 1/2 of a normal dose, because paradoxically your symptoms might briefly get way worse otherwise, which can put you at major risk of an SSRI-crash (also known as a "PSSD-crash" in the med damage community)..

If you dont mind me asking, how were you damaged by psych drugs? I've never heard much about that.
I would love to stop taking them, but unfortunately my parents make me take them. (I still live with my parents haha) usually I just flush them down the toilet.. but I probably wouldn't be able to stop them due to my parents. The reason why is because they just dont really know what to do with me, to be honest. They dont know how to truly help me besides meds and therapy. I cant blame them. If I stopped taking them, they most definitely wouldn't know what to do with me.

I take about 175 mg of the SSRIs if I remember correctly, along with some iron pills to boost my iron levels. It's starting to take a bit longer for the physical withdrawal symptoms to kick in—before when I started going cold turkey on them, the symptoms would kick in almost immediately. Now, they take about 2-3 days to kick in, and even when they do they aren't nearly as bad. As for the mental withdrawals, I guess it's gotten way worse than I imagined.

 

[Fadenself00_]

If you dont mind me asking, how were you damaged by psych drugs? I've never heard much about that.
I would love to stop taking them, but unfortunately my parents make me take them. (I still live with my parents haha) usually I just flush them down the toilet.. but I probably wouldn't be able to stop them due to my parents. The reason why is because they just dont really know what to do with me, to be honest. They dont know how to truly help me besides meds and therapy. I cant blame them. If I stopped taking them, they most definitely wouldn't know what to do with me.

I take about 175 mg of the SSRIs if I remember correctly, along with some iron pills to boost my iron levels. It's starting to take a bit longer for the physical withdrawal symptoms to kick in—before when I started going cold turkey on them, the symptoms would kick in almost immediately. Now, they take about 2-3 days to kick in, and even when they do they aren't nearly as bad. As for the mental withdrawals, I guess it's gotten way worse than I imagined.

Your entire situation sounds like the breeding ground for a total downward spiral like it happened to me. If you're 18+, you should be able to get in contact with social workers and get out of that place with your parents, it reminds me of my toxic situation. .I don't have the capacity rn, but please look through my posting history for now if you want to..

You seem to be majorly at risk for spiraling down into the psychiatry mill

 

[lovelulu]

Your entire situation sounds like the breeding ground for a total downward spiral like it happened to me. If you're 18+, you should be able to get in contact with social workers and get out of that place with your parents, it reminds me of my toxic situation. .I don't have the capacity rn, but please look through my posting history for now if you want to..

You seem to be majorly at risk for spiraling down into the psychiatry mill

Don't worry, they aren't bad parents or anything. I just say that because im very mentally ill, and theres not much they can do for me at this point. Meds are the only thing that makes them think im atleast stable, if that makes sense.

Sorry if this is a dumb qusetion, but what is the psychiatry mill?

 

[Fadenself00_]

Meds are the only thing that makes them think im atleast stable, if that makes sense.

I mean, what's important is that you are actually stable, not what others think

Sorry if this is a dumb qusetion, but what is the psychiatry mill?

Psychiatry and especially psych drugs can lead you down an absolutely disgusting downward spiral.. Either directly via appearing severely mentally ill from something like SSRI withdrawl, and getting blasted with high doses of antipsychotics, or via experiencing what the community of med damaged people call a "crash".. This can be thought of a massive neurological/neurochemical event, that can leave you (severely!) impaired, and sensitize you extremely to other/all substances..

The strong withdrawl symptoms, together with you having mentioned that they weren't this strong before, implies that your brain is getting more vulnerable, and from my experience being directly affected, plus what I have seen from others, this seems like a massive red flag to me..