I'm deeply sorry to hear that you're going through such immense pain & suffering. I truly wish I could ease your burden, as no one deserves to experience this kind of cruelty.
I would caution against a drug OD attempt. See this post for some pretty useful info on why ODs are a method that shouldn't be considered.:
Why ODs Fail Miserably (A Guide). While it is a bad combo the chances of just getting sick, or worst potentially having long-term consequences make this a very bad idea.
Check
this post for reliable methods if this is truly what you are seeking.
With whatever you decide, I hope you find everything you are looking for and get peace & serenity.