Help Picked a day. How do I ease my nerves?

[shelaysdown]

the idea of ctb has been floating in my head for a long time but recently something shifted and I finally feel ready. This heavy hopelessness fell over me a couple days ago. I've never felt anything like it, it's so bad that my vision feels fuzzy and I struggle to accomplish the simplest tasks. I've never felt ready to die before, but now I'm just itching to get it over with.

I don't really care what people think anymore. i no longer have hope for my future. I've picked a place and a date.
How do I stop myself from getting anxious about it? I worry my nerves will inhibit me from doing what needs to be done.

 

[oddetoad]

Trying to solve this dilemma too
I think using propranolol may be one thing to consider but I'm gonna keep reading threads here

This stupid monkey brain is trying to justify staying on this god forsaken planet lmao

When every logical reasoning points to ending it is the right call

 

[IWishToDie]

the idea of ctb has been floating in my head for a long time but recently something shifted and I finally feel ready. This heavy hopelessness fell over me a couple days ago. I've never felt anything like it, it's so bad that my vision feels fuzzy and I struggle to accomplish the simplest tasks. I've never felt ready to die before, but now I'm just itching to get it over with.

I don't really care what people think anymore. i no longer have hope for my future. I've picked a place and a date.
How do I stop myself from getting anxious about it? I worry my nerves will inhibit me from doing what needs to be done.

Imagine the pain ending. You finally get to finish the race. Best of luck deciding.

 

[Reuthry]

I am going through the same right now, what I started to do is to see ctb as something peaceful, that ends suffering (it's true actually), I was already feeling like nothing is real so I guess it made me easier to adapt to condition, and I also keep reminding myself that I will die anyway one day so I shouldn't worry about it, and I actually do tell myself (out loud, I usually talk to myself) that ctb is beautiful, there is nothing to be scared, I should be happy because I will finally be free of pain, I say things like ctb is something usual a part of myself, I count down days and laugh and I feel proud of myself and say "I am finally closer and keep getting closer." These are helping me with overcoming SI as well, because I tell that it is the normal thing that should be done and I think it tricks my instincts.
I hope my comment helps in some way, best wishes.