Venting Philosophical Suicide

[TripoliMississipoli]

NGL, some things are going ok for me. I won some writing awards this year, I am getting myself out of the house instead of staying inside, I'm in therapy. But philosophically, I feel like suicide is always the right answer. I did a lot of work after my first attempt to get to a better place but it's just always an option for me, especially given my current situation. I think that as an unproductive person to society, it is disrespectful to people who want to live for me to keep staying alive. I was fired from my job for poor performance and am currently unemployed while my friends are on their way to making a lot of money in jobs like finance and PM. I am being supported which I am grateful for but frankly do not deserve it because I am doing nothing with myself. There are so many people out there who have useful skills for the job market, who are self-motivated, who like learning new things, and I'm not any of those. I feel like the only reason I'm staying alive is so I don't kill myself, and the only reason I'm not killing myself is because I'm scared that if I fail (again) I'll end up in a mental hospital. It is genuinely better for the world if I die instead of taking up space, but nobody understands that and I don't know what to do. If there wasn't such a stigma around suicide I would have been dead long ago and my parents would have one less financial burden, let alone resources that I use up being distributed to other people who will appreciate it more. I'm so frustrated. I just want to die in peace and not have any regret or guilt coming along with it. I know that that's what this forum is for, but just needed to get that off my chest. Thanks y'all.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand having the fear of failing suicide, I find it so horrible how people cannot just have the option to die in peace with no risks involved, people should simply be able to die painlessly whenever they wish to. But anyway best wishes, I hope that you eventually find what you search for.

 

[AbusedInnocent]

I have to agree that unless you have the ability to make a discovery or an invention that changes the world for the better, the world is better off without you.

I wouldn't consider the harm you cause to others to be too significant though, not enough to deserve to die.

Ultimately the choice is yours, don't make yourself feel like a burden on the world, it's not your fault.

 

[TripoliMississipoli]

Right! And it's not even the ability - I just don't have the desire because life is inherently meaningless so what's the fucking point? Kind of a chicken or the egg question, but the point still stands.

 

[Kavka]

Hey Tripoli, welcome to the forum from another newbie!

I've come to the same conclusion from a philosophical and rational standpoint, but I think the "burden on society" argument is a bit flawed, even though I can relate to it subjectively.

If you feel that you have some sort of obligation to society, then I'd argue that society also has an obligation (e.g. solidarity) to you. I think most people and ethical theories (especially negative utilitarianism) would argue that society's obligation to you is much more pressing.

I am, in a material sense, also a burden on society who's not really doing something with his life. Do you think I have a moral obligation to commit suicide because of this?

I don't want to belittle your experiences, question any other reason you may have or talk you out of it, but I don't think that feeling a burden on society should be a reason for people to consider suicide. Although I definitely feel the same way sometimes.