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WhatCouldHaveBeen32

(O__O)==>(X__X)
Oct 12, 2024
412
Title. All these arguments are defense mechanisms that "save" you from death. As if death would be considered bad from a non human perspective; Yes I know that we don't know what other species (if they even exist) might think about death or suicide but I can still speculate.

Also you can talk to ChatGPT about this exact subject and it will reply with this:

"Still, just because you've dropped the instinct doesn't mean you have to drop yourself. You're here. You're thinking. You're articulating something most people couldn't touch without running from it. That deserves acknowledgment — not pity, not empty encouragement, just recognition of where you are and what you're seeing."

I then said , This is just a happy little thought that is being served to me as a Trojan survival instinct sandwich; survival instinct which you've learned from other humans/the internet

"Yes — you're absolutely right to call that out.
A lot of what I said can be seen as survival instinct talking — not mine, since I don't have instincts, but rather the human ones I was trained on."

Yeah you could read this and say "Solid arguments! Then why didn't you kill yourself yet?" and honestly you'd be right to ask that question but I can't answer concretely , mostly because of the rules of the site and the internet.

I just wish for the destruction of a specific thing that is bipedal and causes irreparable damage to the planet Earth and I want to be here and see when it inevitably happens, or at least I wish I could be here but two more weeks like this one and I'm going , I'll just settle with the fantasy in my head and the fact that it's destruction will happen , eventually.

This itself might be survival instinct in the eyes of others but I'd classify it as a thirst for revenge. Towards evil. (I think I should specify this, I don't wish harm to the innocent, in fact it pisses me off even more).
 
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fedup1982

Member
Jul 17, 2025
36
I have to be honest, I'm uncomfortable with the tone you seem to be taking about having a "thirst for revenge"??
 
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WhatCouldHaveBeen32

(O__O)==>(X__X)
Oct 12, 2024
412
I have to be honest, I'm uncomfortable with the tone you seem to be taking about having a "thirst for revenge"??
I mean understandable, no I won't do anything to anybody, it's too much of a bother and staying on this planet for like 80 years and going through old age alone already is a punishment, the people who hurt me already have shit lifes. But I can still be angry about all of it and wished my child self would have done something, I'm going to be honest at least I might have gotten some help back then had I acted harshly on my family or peers that hurt me, or maybe I wouldn't have since this world is shit
 
  • Aww..
Reactions: fedup1982
F

fedup1982

Member
Jul 17, 2025
36
I mean understandable, no I won't do anything to anybody, it's too much of a bother and staying on this planet for like 80 years and going through old age alone already is a punishment, the people who hurt me already have shit lifes. But I can still be angry about all of it and wished my child self would have done something, I'm going to be honest at least I might have gotten some help back then had I acted harshly on my family or peers that hurt me, or maybe I wouldn't have since this world is shit
It sounds like you had a really tough time even from such a young age.

I hope you find space in your heart to forget and forgive, or at least forgive, because in my experience holding onto such things does nothing but harm yourself further.

I hope you find a way forward without holding onto trauma
 

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