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i am so lainpilled :3 (? days left)
- Apr 15, 2023
- 248
I've thought about ending my worthless and depressing existence for the past 11 years but I always get tripped out by the permanency of it all. Because on one hand, I definitely want the anguish of my forced existence to go away but on the other hand, it's like, "So is that it?" and I try to visualise what life without me would look like. Sometimes I get a bit sad but sometimes I don't care at all, but I do get weirded out. I wish I could just disappear without any fuss or funeral or disruption to anyone's life. I don't want to be talked about or even thought about, just forgotten. Makes the permanency of death feel less permanent if everyone moves on or idk