I have had health issues since I was 17, and 7 years later I'm in complete hell. My hands, legs, and feet are struck with peripheral neuropathy, I'm permanently fatigued and exhausted, my legs always feel so heavy it takes so much willpower to get up or do anything knowing my legs are permanently like this. If I do too much I get a fever and inflammation in my legs. I had tumors in my ovaries and abdominal cavity that permanently fucked up my bladder and everything around it even after they were removed.
I have GI issues and chronic constipation, that make it difficult for me to eat. My cognitive abilities are in the toilet and have lead to 24/7 brainfog, which I can only compare to being stoned all the time, but without the warm and nice feelings, only the complete daze of not knowing what's going on around you and your memory being completely shot. The things that made me feel human are gone.
One of my spinal discs is degenerating and I often have very uncomfortable back pain that ruins my whole day, because I am not given any pain management. I have headaches that make me want to tear my hair out (if it was not already falling out) and scream. My circulation is poor and I'm extremely sensitive to temperature all the time, to sound, to light, it makes me feel like a mummified zombie more than a human.
Hands down, this is why I have to ctb. I was already born autistic, which was hard enough, but being so disabled, struggling so much, and then getting no help from the outside world because my conditions are invisible to the naked eye is my death knell. When you have conditions like this, many people will accuse you of faking it and not take it seriously no matter how much you suffer. Multiple family members of mine died from extraordinarily painful complications of autoimmune diseases, and I can only imagine this is my future as well if I don't do something about it before.