FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,891
I find it so horrible and insensitive when people act like existence is something so positive even know it's the source of all suffering, toxic positivity truly does just make me wish for death even more, it just reminds me of how repulsive this human species really is. Existence was never something positive in the first place, rather the existence of life was an abomination, the fact that life even exists at all is the most horrific, terrible tragedy.

The amount of harm existence has caused is simply beyond comprehension and it disturbs me how there is no limit as to how much one can suffer in an existence so meaningless and undesirable, I see existence itself as the true problem because after all, if life never existed nobody would be able to feel pain or be harmed in any way. Existing truly is the most hopeless and futile process of waiting around to die anyway, there truly is no beauty in any of this, existence really is just meaningless suffering and it's horrific how existing beings have to suffer so much even know there are no disadvantages to never existing at all.

Both procreating into this hellish reality and denying people painless suicide methods are criminal to me and it's disgusting how shallow and insulting toxic positivity is used to try and jusify these immensely harmful crimes that serve no purpose but to torment existing beings until they die anyway. I wish nothing ever existed at all, I'd see it as better that existence is erased, death truly is the only relief for me, it'll always be dreadful to exist.
 
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progressingdeath

progressingdeath

Member
May 24, 2024
12
I agree with all of your points however I already exist without any way in if I wanted to exist or not so because of that I want to enjoy whatever I can enjoy knowing ultimately I'm going to CTB. I'm typically a very positive/happy person, not masking either, but even then I know I'm going to CTB soon. What makes it worse is it's very easy for me to go from okay to horrible and want to kill myself 100% more but I don't want to die in an irrational state but I also see it doesn't matter what state I die in because I'm just waiting for it to happen anyways. I just want it to be a conscious choice over an emotional one
 

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