Peer pressure

[Aphid]

I feel bad for making so many threads, but I think maybe live-streaming might help me commit to my CTB because it will make me feel more pressured into doing this. Thoughts on it? Where would I do something like that :(?

 

[peacebenow]

You don't want to rely on peer pressure for something as serious as this. This would not be a smart thing to do for so many reasons. Please don't.

 

[Aphid]

ive tried so many times and ive tried to make up my mind i just need a push i just need a push i just need a push I just need a push i

You don't want to rely on peer pressure for something as serious as this. This would not be a smart thing to do for so many reasons. Please don't.

are there any sites you know of, please.

 

[Front Back]

ive tried so many times and ive tried to make up my mind i just need a push i just need a push i just need a push I just need a push i

are there any sites you know of, please.

If you still need a push, you ain't ready.

 

[Aphid]

I am ive been ready im tired of waiting im tired of failing and doing damage and doing it again im tired im tired im tired im tired, my whole life its just been this, just been this, being told no time after time. Even after all of this im always denied the death I deserve, the death ive earned. id make it worse if i could. maybe i will. maybe I will. everyone's deserved better of me, maybe im just not good enough to die either. not good enough to live not good enough to die but just right enough to torture myself endlessly. ffuck.

 

[Unworthyhuman]

I often think I'm not good enough to die either...but then I understand it's SI and all the failed attempts and the consequences of them. My brain always has a way of tricking me that things can get better....can't say i've ever needed a "push" I just truly have to want it and convince my brain and find a way my body can't survive. When I think of jumping in front of a train or jumping off a bridge, I think of what it would be like to survive and the people it would impact...it's terrible thing to still care

 

[Aphid]

I often think I'm not good enough to die either...but then I understand it's SI and all the failed attempts and the consequences of them. My brain always has a way of tricking me that things can get better....can't say i've ever needed a "push" I just truly have to want it and convince my brain and find a way my body can't survive. When I think of jumping in front of a train or jumping off a bridge, I think of what it would be like to survive and the people it would impact...it's terrible thing to still care

it is,
im glad you have some faith, you deserve much more than what you've been receiving from the world. I truly hope things can turn around for you, or if they don't, I hope peace, and happiness.

 

[Unworthyhuman]

it is,
im glad you have some faith, you deserve much more than what you've been receiving from the world. I truly hope things can turn around for you, or if they don't, I hope peace, and happiness.

oh i'm working on partial hanging and visine right now, I care too much about hurting others so I can't do those things above, but if I can't find something that doesn't directly traumatize another human...I'm in. I don't deserve happiness, but I do deserve peace in dying. Maybe one day I will stop caring about others and jump in front of a train.

 

[Aphid]

oh i'm working on partial hanging and visine right now, I care too much about hurting others so I can't do those things above, but if I can't find something that doesn't directly traumatize another human...I'm in. I don't deserve happiness, but I do deserve peace in dying. Maybe one day I will stop caring about others and jump in front of a train.

good luck

im trying full suspension, but id like to do it outside somewhere. there is a cell tower I know of that I may go to, or the woods nearby.we will see.

 

[PanaxMan]

I feel bad for making so many threads, but I think maybe live-streaming might help me commit to my CTB because it will make me feel more pressured into doing this. Thoughts on it? Where would I do something like that :(?

Like the Russian streamer suicide and the facebook suicide. Those don't come from peer pressure. Most of those guys did and planned it before they even did livestreaming