Parents Of Children who CTB

[TimeToPackUp]

I notice, parents villainize this site as a result of losing their child. Or when they find out their child is using this site. I don't have children so I will tread as lightly as possible, and I understand the outrage. My question is, do they ever reflect? In my personal beliefs I don't think anyone under 25 should be "legally" allowed to CTB, that were if assistance in dying clinics were available around the world. I think the problem is that those facilities are villainized. Suicide is such a sensitive topic, we all know this, the way society handles talks of suicide is wrong in my opinion. If your child tells you that they're suicidal, they're afraid you're going to either A. Sob hysterically B. Become emotionally or physically erratic C. Remind them of how privileged they are, and how this is not fair to you or anyone else, and how it's so selfish D. Tell other family others they don't want to know E. Have them locked up in a mental institution, or all of the above. Now we're all human, I get it, some reactions may come as a reflex as I imagine it would be heartbreaking for your child to tell you such a thing. I guess what I'm trying to say is, if we could talk about suicidal ideations without a child fearing those things, they'd be more likely to open up to their parents. If we had assistance in dying clinics, and everyone wasn't trying to be on this moral high ground superiority BS, we could help the people who are truly suffering. They wouldn't need a site like this, no one would need a site like this. They wouldn't need to be desperate to try and find methods on this site. They would be able to talk to you openly about suicide and you guys find a way to heal as family before they're of legal age to get assistance in dying. What I'm saying would be seen as immoral to a lot of people though, and that in my opinion is the problem. Not this site, it's easy to blame this site and possibly take no accountability, not trying to figure out what led them here to begin with. I understand a site like this may still exist with the availability of those clinics, but i really believe there would be way less traffic here if you guys didn't make vulnerable people feel guilty, or feel like they're the problem, or you're going to have them locked and forced to see countless therapists. There should be a place where suffering people could go with a loved one, and choose when they leave the earth. That's a human right in my eyes, that's why I say Switzerland does some things better than where I live. I'm at the end now and I didn't take religion into account until now, that's a whole different conversation I won't get into. I'll just end it with, stop villainizing suicidal people, and those who want AD clinics. We should be able to have conversations about suicide anywhere in society with no judgement. So parents and their kids can work through it properly, with the correct emotional responses. Yes it's a sensitive topic but we aren't handling it correctly right now in my opinion, that's all.

 

[Aisley]

When someone loses a child, they need someone to blame for it. And suicide flies in the face of the whole accountability thing, even though at its heart it is an individual taking the ultimate accountability for themselves. Many parents will blame themselves. Not saying they should, it's just the first thing a lot of people will do. Two seperate people made their way here to talk about their kids without villainizing anyone here. But there are those people who are too blind, too stuck in their righteous hatred to see what happened, and what continues to happen here. All they know is someone must be held accountable, and they stop thinking after that. Like a cliff they can't see.

 

[Worndown]

Parents have a terrible time whenever a child dies, regardless the reason.
If they die by their own hand and visited this site, they can blame us rather than just shake their fist at the sky.
That their child would have ctb without this site is seldom considered. Grief need someone to blame and that is us.

 

[Little_Suzy]

VAD, like everything else, is a huge business. I don't have any children, but if my child came to me and asked for VAD in Switzerland, I would first question whether they had the $15,000+ to finance such a luxury.

People speak about the "right to die" and "legalized euthanasia," but they never discuss the costs and repercussions.

VAD will very certainly render life insurance and related payouts void.

The "right to die" on your own terms, inexpensively, dignified, peacefully, and without red tape, is also an enticing choice.

 

[TimeToPackUp]

That's why I make a point that it's disappointing it's not available everywhere. It may still be expensive but not as expensive as traveling so far away. As far as life insurance and all that, Switzerland has found a way to make it work, I'm sure where I live, they could as well, they just don't want to. I also hear it's even hard to get assistance based solely on mental health anyway. It's all fucked.

Parents have a terrible time whenever a child dies, regardless the reason.
If they die by their own hand and visited this site, they can blame us rather than just shake their fist at the sky.
That their child would have ctb without this site is seldom considered. Grief need someone to blame and that is us.

I agree, can't say how I'd react, I just wish people felt more comfortable being open about talking of suicide without fear of being seen as immoral. Or the fear of guilt or whatever else. I think that would actually allow us to avoid more people taking their own life.

 

[TimeToPackUp]

When someone loses a child, they need someone to blame for it. And suicide flies in the face of the whole accountability thing, even though at its heart it is an individual taking the ultimate accountability for themselves. Many parents will blame themselves. Not saying they should, it's just the first thing a lot of people will do. Two seperate people made their way here to talk about their kids without villainizing anyone here. But there are those people who are too blind, too stuck in their righteous hatred to see what happened, and what continues to happen here. All they know is someone must be held accountable, and they stop thinking after that. Like a cliff they can't see.

Very well said. That takes courage. I'm not necessarily mad that they blame us or this website. I just hate how suicidal ideation is handled todays society. I think if it changed less parents would have to worry about their children coming to this site.

 

[FuneralCry]

I just think that if people are going to be selfish enough to so unnecessarily force life into this horrible world then they have to accept that they don't own their children, the children aren't their property. The fact is that nobody is obligated to continue delaying their inevitable fate and children shouldn't have to be punished because of the selfish actions of other people to procreate by being forced to endure the burden that is existence.

It's inhumane to wish to make people prisoners to this existence and it's also absurd wanting to put an age restriction of 25+ on legalised assisted suicide. As after all existing is just futile and meaningless suffering, we are all destined to die anyway with everything eventually forgotten about, so if someone wishes to take control over their fate in a peaceful way, they should be able to. Saying that suicide is wrong under certain circumstances makes little sense when to die solves all problems. But nobody should procreate in the first place, it's sad how humans lack awareness to recognise that existence is just an unnecessary harm and are so blinded by selfishness. The nonexistent should be left alone in peace, they don't deserve to be burdened with existence.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I just think that if people are going to be selfish enough to so unnecessarily force life into this horrible world then they have to accept that they don't own their children, the children aren't their property. The fact is that nobody is obligated to continue delaying their inevitable fate and children shouldn't have to be punished because of the selfish actions of other people to procreate by being forced to endure the burden that is existence.

It's inhumane to wish to make people prisoners to this existence and it's also absurd wanting to put an age restriction of 25+ on legalised assisted suicide. As after all existing is just futile and meaningless suffering, we are all destined to die anyway with everything eventually forgotten about, so if someone wishes to take control over their fate in a peaceful way, they should be able to. Saying that suicide is wrong under certain circumstances makes little sense when to die solves all problems. But nobody should procreate in the first place, it's sad how humans lack awareness to recognise that existence is just an unnecessary harm and are so blinded by selfishness. The nonexistent should be left alone in peace, they don't deserve to be burdened with existence.

You have your way with words Funeral Cry!! Honestly me existing wasn't even my choice to begin with and I tried this life thing and it's not for me so I want to exit! People should decide when they want to leave this world since we are brought to this world without having a say in it… I truly wish I was never born and I hope there is nothingness after this lifetime and if I were to be born again I will choose the same ending…. Life is truly terrible for some of us ( people who are here on this site for different reasons).. My existence in this world is a huge burden and I truly hate it.

 

[betternever2havbeen]

I would think it was crazy if I CTB and my mum was blaming this site or sellers of SN for a decision I made of my own free will. I understand they are angry but their adult child wasn't "stolen" from them, or "murdered" (or whatever emotive words they're currently using) they made a decision for themselves to end their lives. I'm sorry these parents can't come to terms with that and stop being so fuelled by anger. I'm sure their kids wouldn't have wanted that-I know I wouldn't. I think they all need therapy.

 

[Goodgirlryeo101]

I would think it was crazy if I CTB and my mum was blaming this site or sellers of SN for a decision I made of my own free will. I understand they are angry but their adult child wasn't "stolen" from them, or "murdered" (or whatever emotive words they're currently using) they made a decision for themselves to end their lives. I'm sorry these parents can't come to terms with that and stop being so fuelled by anger. I'm sure their kids wouldn't have wanted that-I know I wouldn't. I think they all need therapy.

This is one of the reasons why I never wanted to be a parent because some of these parents inflict pain on their child and then they act surprised when their child decide to complete ctb…. Maybe they should look in the mirrors themselves and if see their actions were innocent…. After my own experiences in life I realise that in this life you only have yourself to rely on and tbh one of my biggest regret was not completing ctb successfully in 2018…. I wasn't meant for this thing called life at all and even if the parents didn't inflict pain on their child they would have fond other ways to complete ctb without coming to this website… people have been completing ctb way before this site existed…. I can understand if they want to blame this site thought because it might make them feel better about themselves….

 

[TimeToPackUp]

I just think that if people are going to be selfish enough to so unnecessarily force life into this horrible world then they have to accept that they don't own their children, the children aren't their property. The fact is that nobody is obligated to continue delaying their inevitable fate and children shouldn't have to be punished because of the selfish actions of other people to procreate by being forced to endure the burden that is existence.

It's inhumane to wish to make people prisoners to this existence and it's also absurd wanting to put an age restriction of 25+ on legalised assisted suicide. As after all existing is just futile and meaningless suffering, we are all destined to die anyway with everything eventually forgotten about, so if someone wishes to take control over their fate in a peaceful way, they should be able to. Saying that suicide is wrong under certain circumstances makes little sense when to die solves all problems. But nobody should procreate in the first place, it's sad how humans lack awareness to recognise that existence is just an unnecessary harm and are so blinded by selfishness. The nonexistent should be left alone in peace, they don't deserve to be burdened with existence.

You are right, there shouldn't be an age restriction. It should be available for those who truly need it. I wanted to CTB ever since I was 17. It's been so many years now and I haven't changed my mind at all, things have only gotten worse. It's just easier now because I have a better method. That's why I say suicide should be able to be talked about between families without guilt tripping, blaming, or threats(sending them away or forcing them in an institution). That way less families and parents would be blindsided, and if their child unfortunately can't end the suffering, they won't have to exit alone.