Parent thinks a person can simply stab themselves in the heart to commit suicide

[Wrennie]

When I was talking to my parent about suicide, they expressed a sentiment along the lines of "Why not just stab themselves through the heart if they were really that desperate? It's what I would do."

Gee, I don't know? - MAYBE BECAUSE THAT'S UTTERLY DESTINED FOR FAILURE.

They literally have no fucking clue how complicated attaining a successful death actually is, or the severe damage one can accrue from failures of any kind, or how that could render future attempts impossible and forever entrap a person. I try to explain how thoroughly I've researched this subject and it's dismissed each time as me actually possessing some will left to live because I haven't yet gone to the extreme. Well, I think jumping off of a building is pretty fucking extreme (and would you look at that, I'm now INFINITELY WORSE OFF BECAUSE OF IT).

If I did manage to attempt to stab myself through the heart, but survived, I know that people still wouldn't take my desire to die seriously.

I just "haven't tried hard enough".

Nothing is ever "enough" for these people.

 

[Versailles]

Wow, I also told my mother and she wondered why I did not jump into a truck on the highway

 

[thebigpigman]

When I was talking to my parent about suicide, they expressed a sentiment along the lines of "Why not just stab themselves through the heart if they were really that desperate? It's what I would do."

Gee, I don't know - MAYBE BECAUSE THAT'S UTTERLY DESTINED FOR FAILURE.

They literally have no fucking clue how complicated attaining a successful death actually is, or the severe damage one can accrue from failures of any kind, or how that could render future attempts impossible and forever entrap a person. I try to explain how thoroughly I've researched this subject and it's dismissed each time as me actually possessing some will left to live because I haven't yet gone to the extreme. Well, I think jumping off of a building is pretty fucking extreme (and would you look at that, I'm now INFINITELY WORSE OFF BECAUSE OF IT).

If I did manage to attempt to stab myself through the heart, but survived, I know that people still wouldn't take my desire to die seriously.

I just haven't "tried hard enough".

Nothing is ever "enough" for these people.

It is very hard and worse thing to do. A year ago, I was too suicidal didn't know anything, I was thinking to stab in the neck where the veins are. But I always thought I don't have power and strength to do that. I was even ready with the knife ready to strike but failed miserably. People die a horrible death like this.

 

[Amumu]

Incredible. So if I shot myself under the chin (DON'T DO THAT, SERIOUSLY) and became disfigured and debilitated, jumped out of the window of a small building and broke my hips and lost the use of my legs, tried to hang myself, failed and had brain damaged, the reaction of people'd be :

"Come on man, you've clearly not tried that hard, you still have an incredible will to live and beautiful days ahead of you can be there."

My answer would be :

"zjaknrarieuhazriharuparpaurajp"

Because I couldn't talk, obviously.

 

[Wrennie]

Wow, I also told my mother and she wondered why I did not jump into a truck on the highway

I'm so sorry to hear that. Do people just not get that there's always a chance of survival?

And what then?

When you're paralyzed in a hospital bed it's not like you'll ever get another chance at escape. In fact, the torture just amplifies exponentially.

 

[Versailles]

I'm so sorry to hear that. Do people just not get that there's always a chance of survival?

And what then?

When you're paralyzed in a hospital bed it's not like you'll ever get another chance at escape. In fact, the torture just amplifies exponentially.

I'm from a place where no one takes CTB seriously, or makes fun of it. That's why they call me a fag, but I'm used to it, I guess.

 

[Wrennie]

I'm from a place where no one takes CTB seriously, or makes fun of it. That's why they call me a fag, but I'm used to it, I guess.

That seems to be the mindset everywhere, unfortunately (exempting maybe Switzerland and Belgium).

 

[Pluto]

Their logic is acceptable if they are from Japan. :D

Seppuku (Japanese: 切腹, "cutting [the] belly") is a form of Japanese ritual suicide by disembowelment. ...As a samurai practice, seppuku was used voluntarily by samurai to die with honor rather than fall into the hands of their enemies (and likely be tortured), as a form of capital punishment for samurai who had committed serious offenses, or performed because they had brought shame to themselves. The ceremonial disembowelment, which is usually part of a more elaborate ritual and performed in front of spectators, consists of plunging a short blade, traditionally a tantō, into the belly and drawing the blade from left to right, slicing the belly open.[4] If the cut is deep enough, it can sever the descending aorta, causing a rapid death by blood loss.

 

[Wrennie]

Their logic is acceptable if they are from Japan. :D

Seppuku (Japanese: 切腹, "cutting [the] belly") is a form of Japanese ritual suicide by disembowelment. ...As a samurai practice, seppuku was used voluntarily by samurai to die with honor rather than fall into the hands of their enemies (and likely be tortured), as a form of capital punishment for samurai who had committed serious offenses, or performed because they had brought shame to themselves. The ceremonial disembowelment, which is usually part of a more elaborate ritual and performed in front of spectators, consists of plunging a short blade, traditionally a tantō, into the belly and drawing the blade from left to right, slicing the belly open.[4] If the cut is deep enough, it can sever the descending aorta, causing a rapid death by blood loss.

I still can't fathom how anyone could go through with that unless they were higher than high off of the most potent of pain drugs in existence.

 

[ocklepold]

Well, I think jumping off of a building is pretty fucking extreme (and would you look at that, I'm now INFINITELY WORSE OFF BECAUSE OF IT).

I'm considering jumping as my method. Any advice? How did you fail?

 

[Pluto]

I still can't fathom how anyone could go through with that unless they were higher than high off of the most potent of pain drugs in existence.

Very true. Though the Japanese have always been an exceptional people.

 

[Wrennie]

I'm considering jumping as my method. Any advice? How did you fail?

I had a horrific drug reaction and jumped out of the nearest open window because I wasn't in any frame of mind to properly assess the situation. The building was tall enough to permanently damage and render me a pseudo-cripple, but not high enough to kill me (I was intending to land on my head but my body involuntarily 'righted' itself at the very last moment).

If you jump, make sure the height is as high as you can get.
No chance of survival.
Because trust me when I say this: modern orthopedic medicine is COMPLETE AND UTTER TRASH.
No surgeon can or will fix you. They will shamelessly leave you to rot; deformed and in a state of perpetual pain & misery.

 

[ocklepold]

I had a horrific drug reaction and jumped out of the nearest open window because I wasn't in any frame of mind to properly assess the situation. The building was tall enough to permanently damage and render me a pseudo-cripple, but not high enough to kill me (I was intending to land on my head but my body involuntarily 'righted' itself at the very last moment).

If you jump, make sure the height is as high as you can get.
No chance of survival.
Because trust me when I say this: modern orthopedic medicine is COMPLETE AND UTTER TRASH.
No surgeon can or will fix you. They will shamelessly leave you to rot; deformed and in a state of perpetual pain & misery.

Thank you. I'm very sorry to hear that happened to you.

 

[Deleted member 8579]

Wow, I also told my mother and she wondered why I did not jump into a truck on the highway

Every time you bring up suicide by train, people will be quick to say "No, you can't traumatise the innocent train drivers!" which completely fails to address the point that suicide methods like these are usually chosen due to a lack of other methods.
I have never seen anyone say: "Oh, those poor train drivers! If only some more humane suicide methods were available, they could drive their trains in peace."
Incidentally, I have never seen train drivers advocate for euthanasia, despite that being in their best interest...

Incredible. So if I shot myself under the chin (DON'T DO THAT, SERIOUSLY) and became disfigured and debilitated, jumped out of the window of a small building and broke my hips and lost the use of my legs, tried to hang myself, failed and had brain damaged, the reaction of people'd be :

"Come on man, you've clearly not tried that hard, you still have an incredible will to live and beautiful days ahead of you can be there."

They would say: "He only did that for attention. Thousands of people kill themselves each year, so if he really wanted to die, he would be dead."

Their logic is acceptable if they are from Japan. :D

Seppuku (Japanese: 切腹, "cutting [the] belly") is a form of Japanese ritual suicide by disembowelment. ...As a samurai practice, seppuku was used voluntarily by samurai to die with honor rather than fall into the hands of their enemies (and likely be tortured), as a form of capital punishment for samurai who had committed serious offenses, or performed because they had brought shame to themselves. The ceremonial disembowelment, which is usually part of a more elaborate ritual and performed in front of spectators, consists of plunging a short blade, traditionally a tantō, into the belly and drawing the blade from left to right, slicing the belly open.[4] If the cut is deep enough, it can sever the descending aorta, causing a rapid death by blood loss.

This is missing the most important part:
"The most common form of seppuku for men was composed of the cutting of the abdomen, and when the samurai was finished, he stretched out his neck for an assistant to sever his spinal cord. It was the assistant's job to decapitate the samurai in one swing, otherwise it would bring great shame to the assistant and his family."

So from the 17th century onward, it was essentially a more elaborate form of decapitation, to wit:
"Over time, the process became so highly ritualised that as soon as the samurai reached for his blade the kaishakunin would strike. Eventually even the blade became unnecessary and the samurai could reach for something symbolic like a fan, and this would trigger the killing stroke from his second. The fan was likely used when the samurai was too old to use the blade or in situations where it was too dangerous to give him a weapon."

 

[Midgardsorm]

My father laughed at me when I said I could kill myself. I said two times, we laughed in both, the last one he said I haven't done yet because "I wasn't a coward".

Sorry father, but people haven't done yet for a lot reasons.
Mine? I haven't done yet exactly because I AM A COWARD.

Just to note, as we are not the ones who needs the explanation (But it wouldn't matter for them, yet it's good to know ) .
One of my ctb methods were gunshot to the heart.
Stabbing would have a high chance of failure. Heart is within the rib cage. I do not know the exact distance between two ribs (Intercostal Space) but it's obviously not much. For a knife to go through the ribs you need to aim precisely between the ribs, very difficult when you're aiming at yourself and you will be probably shaking. If you miss, you will have no energy left for a second strike.
Also, for a more decisive strike you would need to twist the blade, simply impossible to do it yourself when you are wounded, and to the heart no less.

Wrennie, I'm so sorry. People do not understand us, unfortunately I think they never will.

Oh and forgive me, I read that you were using fluvoxamine and it caused you problems. It's exactly what I'm using now and, yes, I'm starting to feel side effects, however my breathing condition will worsen if I stop. There's no way out.

Anyway, it's nice to meet you.

I wish you peace.

 

[Wrennie]

My father laughed at me when I said I could kill myself. I said two times, we laughed in both, the last one he said I haven't done yet because "I wasn't a coward".

Sorry father, but I haven't done yet exactly because I AM A COWARD.

Just to note, as we are not the ones who needs the explanation (But it wouldn't matter for them, yet it's good to know ) .
One of my ctb methods were gunshot to the heart.
Stabbing would have a high chance of failure. Heart is within the rib cage. I do not know the exact distance between two ribs (Intercostal Space) but it's obviously not much. For a knife to go through the ribs you need to aim precisely between the ribs, very difficult when you're aiming at yourself and you will be probably shaking. Also, for a more decisive strike you would need to twist the blade, simply impossible to do it yourself when you are wounded, and to the heart no less.

Wrennie, I'm so sorry. People do not understand us, unfortunately I think they never will.

Oh and forgive me, I read that you were using fluvoxamine and it caused you problems. It's exactly what I'm using now and, yes, I'm starting to feel side effects, however my breathing condition will worsen if I stop. There's no way out.

Anyway, it's nice to meet you.

I wish you peace.

I truly loathe that suicide is still regarded as an act of cowardice by society as a whole, when overcoming survival instinct/billions of years worth of evolution is probably the most daunting task that anyone could undertake. I'm so sorry that your father said something so callous, even if it wasn't in his intent to harm you with his words.

You also have my deepest condolences that you're afflicted with a breathing condition. Was it a byproduct of Covid? I read somewhere that Fluvoxamine was utilized to help with Covid symptoms in some cases, but I'm unsure of the mechanism behind how it would work for that express purpose. I pray you don't suffer the same effects that Fluvoxamine inflicted upon me. Ultimately Pristiq was the drug that lead to me jumping out of a window, but Fluvoxamine permanently chemically castrated me (although this may have been due to me being forcibly administered it as a mere child. Ultimately I'll never know.)

You're correct in that there's seemingly no way out. The pharmaceuticals we use to try and correct one problem usually inevitably create another. It's an endless cycle, and then we're prescribed more and more drugs to manage the newly arising conditions stemming from the ever-increasing number of meds we're placed on, until we can't even trace which pill resulted in what. In the end, it's the corrupt institutions such as Big Pharma that benefit from our degeneration.

 

[Midgardsorm]

I truly loathe that suicide is still regarded as an act of cowardice by society as a whole, when overcoming survival instinct/billions of years worth of evolution is probably the most daunting task that anyone could undertake. I'm so sorry that your father said something so callous, even if it wasn't his intent to harm you with his words.

You also have my deepest condolences that you're afflicted with a breathing condition. Was it a byproduct of Covid? I read somewhere that Fluvoxamine was utilized to help with Covid symptoms in some cases, but I'm unsure of the mechanism behind how it would work for that express purpose. I pray you don't suffer the same effects that Fluvoxamine inflicted upon me. Ultimately Pristiq was the drug that lead to me jumping out of a window, but Fluvoxamine permanently chemically castrated me (although this may have been due to me being placed on it as a mere child. Ultimately I'll never know.)

You're correct in that there's seemingly no way out. The pharmaceuticals we use to try and correct one problem usually inevitably create another. It's an endless cycle, and then we're prescribed more and more drugs to manage the newly arising conditions resulting from the ever-increasing number of meds we're placed on, until we can't even trace which pill resulted in what. In the end, it's the corrupt institutions such as Big Pharma that benefit from our degeneration.

Yes. Suicide is still seem as act of cowardice, despite the immensely difficult task of overcoming survival instinct. No wonder one of my very first posts here were about combining Harakiri with SN. Harakiri isn't exactly lethal without beheading so I planned to use SN too. I was obviously advised not to do so.
I guess I planned to disembowel me to prove people I wasn't being coward. At that time I didn't knew it was useless to try reasoning with prolifers.

My breathing condition wasn't Covid. It's a damage to the nasal turbines, very close to a rare condition called Empty Nose Syndrome.
Nasal turbines are responsible for humidifying and warming air that reaches the lungs, but also, have a lot of nerve ends that are responsible for the sensation of breathing. Without it, you breath but you cannot feel it, resulting in a 24/7 sensation of drowning.
It's not exactly my case, but it's very close to it.
I also have a deviated septum because of a punch to the face I took then I was 15, which worsen the problem.

Fluvoxamine was prescribed to me to treat my OCD, but also to treat anxiety, which, according to the doctor, were the only responsible for my breathing condition and nothing else. I did notice some improvement on my breathlessness since anxiety really does worsen the problem, so I kept using, but different from what he claimed, it's not the responsible for the problem as the lungs are being damaged as well. (ENS damages the lung with time).
The side effects, unfortunately, are greatly reducing my libido but I have no choice.

 

[Wrennie]

Yes. Suicide is still seem as act of cowardice, despite the immensely difficult task of overcoming survival instinct. No wonder one of my very first posts here were about combining Harakiri with SN. Harakiri isn't exactly lethal without beheading so I planned to use SN too. I was obviously advised not to do so.
I guess I planned to disembowel me to prove people I wasn't being coward. At that time I didn't knew it was useless to try reasoning with prolifers.

My breathing condition wasn't Covid. It's a damage to the nasal turbines, very close to a rare condition called Empty Nose Syndrome.
Nasal turbines are responsible for humidifying and warming air that reaches the lungs, but also, have a lot of nerve ends that are responsible for the sensation of breathing. Without it, you breath but you cannot feel it, resulting in a 24/7 sensation of drowning.
It's not exactly my case, but it's very close to it.
I also have a deviated septum because of a punch to the face I took then I was 15, which worsen the problem.

Fluvoxamine was prescribed to me to treat my OCD, but also to treat anxiety, which, according to the doctor, were the only responsible for my breathing condition and nothing else. I did notice some improvement on my breathlessness since anxiety really does worsen the problem, so I kept using, but different from what he claimed, it's not the responsible for the problem as the lungs are being damaged as well. (ENS damages the lung with time).
The side effects, unfortunately, are greatly reducing my libido but I have no choice.

To feel pressured to have to prove to others that you aren't a "coward" via your chosen method of death solely because of the stigma associated with suicide is unbelievably tragic, but I completely understand your line of reasoning for considering such drastic measures. For those that surround you to be so utterly blind to your signals of suffering that they'd ascribe such a label to you is beyond heartless.

I have heard about ENS and it is a truly devastating condition. Even if it isn't your precise diagnosis, for having to endure even something similar I grant you my utmost sympathies. In the past I've read a lot of independent accounts from ENS-survivors whose afflictions were primarily due to botched rhinoplasties, so it makes sense that the damage incurred to your septum would serve to exacerbate any such symptoms.

Fluvoxamine can potentially induce a condition called PSSD which is in most, if not all cases, irreversible (unlike some medications where sexual side effects are temporary). If I recall correctly, it is believed to be due to chronic desensitization of the serotonin receptors, which play an active role in arousal?
Are you sure that there aren't any other meds you could supplement in place of it? Although, if you believe that the tradeoff is worth it, and this drug is truly helping you to function, then by no means will I continue my attempts at dissuading you from its usage. I just want for you to be adequately forewarned of the risk is all.

 

[Neowise]

People who were never exposed to medium to severe depression for a longer period of time and / or contemplated suicide have no clue what they are talking about. Even people who have sometimes don't.
Just yesterday I've found a video on a gore site about a guy who shot off his chin and survived. There wasn't more info given but I bet he watched one movie too much and aimed his gun at his chin.

To everyone on this forum and the lurkers: In-form your-self! Suicide is nothing like in movies. Don't ruin your life by trying stupid shit like stabbing your heart or jumping off a two-story building.

 

[Midgardsorm]

@Neowise
I think it can't be considered stupid when you're under the gruesome side-effects of drug.

@Wrennie
Thanks, you're very kind.

My family has a lot of problems, mostly for being stubborn due to religion. I love them, but their mentality is very different from mine.

I left my previous psychiatrist due to a problem with insurance. I couldn't pay him anymore unless I pay him myself, which is VERY expensive and frankly, I don't think he deserves the amount he asked for. He was impatient, ignorant, schedules 200 appointments in 1 day which leaves him with very little time to talk to his patients, takes days to answer my messages, chooses the best time for the appointment based on his schedule and don't even worry about what the patient do, if I refuse an appointment due to his chosen time being unavailable on my schedule, he goes off another week(s) without saying nothing. If I am to pay someone directly, I might as well choose a better doctor.

Then I might try another SSRI. It could be a problem, but fluvoxamine is really expensive here and the side-effects might be permanent if I keep using it. I read about PSS,. It's irreversible in next to all cases. I hope it's not mine, but I don't feel a complete lack of libido, but it's definitely not like before. The breathing condition could be resulting in it too, but I don't know for sure.

 

[OnlyTheWind]

Mom is getting tired of listening to me whine about my life and how I plan to ctb.

 

[Mentalmick]

Might as well just blast a RPG up my ass.

 

[mentalhealthfighter]

Mom is getting tired of listening to me whine about my life and how I plan to ctb.

Same. Everytime I feel like shit I keep repeating how I want euthanasia. Also I keep repeating that I cant hold a job or volunteer.

 

[Midgardsorm]

Might as well just blast a RPG up my ass.

We need to update the methods.

Suicide by:

RPG on the ass.
Falling into a volcano.
Being thrown out of the orbit.

 

[FuneralCry]

If somebody thinks you can die by just doing that, then they are ignorant. As you said, there is chances of failure. If it was easier to die, I would have been gone a long time ago. It is hard to take our lives and I think many people who are not suicidal fail to understand that. I never talk about suicide with people in real life, I think it would certainly not go well. I'm sorry you are suffering, I hope you can find the peace you are looking for.

 

[Meditation guide]

People have stabbed themselves in the heart before and died.

There isn't much that hasn't been done to ctb.

Suicide by self-inflicted stab wound of the chest - PubMed

A case is presented in which a 44-year-old man stabbed himself in the heart with a kitchen knife, then changed his bloody clothes, and ate lunch with his aunt, who did not notice the event. After 2 h he died of cardiac tamponade.

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

 

[Midgardsorm]

People have stabbed themselves in the heart before and died.

There isn't much that hasn't been done to ctb.

Suicide by self-inflicted stab wound of the chest - PubMed

A case is presented in which a 44-year-old man stabbed himself in the heart with a kitchen knife, then changed his bloody clothes, and ate lunch with his aunt, who did not notice the event. After 2 h he died of cardiac tamponade.

pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

You can die by injecting air in your veins. Just need to go to the drugstore, buy a syringe and you're good to go.

The problem is the probability of success.

I didn't even said that the fact of her being a woman. trying to stab herself in the heart has the problem of the breasts, the knife needs to go through the breasts first. Men also have problems due to the fact that they have very tight chests, fit or unfit.

Also a for a more decisive wound, you would need to remove the knife. If you leave it there, it will make pressure and help prevent bloodloss.

So, You need to aim carefully between your ribs, strike with enough strenght for the knife to go through breast/chest muscles, reach the heart, twist the blade and remove it.

Possible? Yes, but very difficult.

 

[Wrennie]

Then I might try another SSRI. It could be a problem, but fluvoxamine is really expensive here and the side-effects might be permanent if I keep using it. I read about PSS,. It's irreversible in next to all cases. I hope it's not mine, but I don't feel a complete lack of libido, but it's definitely not like before. The breathing condition could be resulting in it too, but I don't know for sure.

The onset of PSSD can happen very gradually, almost insidiously slow, until one day you notice it's gone and then there may be no chance of it ever returning (or at least never being on par with the way things were before).
Nevertheless, I wish you all the best with whatever you decide. Finding (any) drug without troublesome effects is like finding a lone needle in a metallic haystack.

 

[thebigpigman]

I had a horrific drug reaction and jumped out of the nearest open window because I wasn't in any frame of mind to properly assess the situation. The building was tall enough to permanently damage and render me a pseudo-cripple, but not high enough to kill me (I was intending to land on my head but my body involuntarily 'righted' itself at the very last moment).

If you jump, make sure the height is as high as you can get.
No chance of survival.
Because trust me when I say this: modern orthopedic medicine is COMPLETE AND UTTER TRASH.
No surgeon can or will fix you. They will shamelessly leave you to rot; deformed and in a state of perpetual pain & misery.

Can you walk or spend the rest of your life in wheelchair?

You can die by injecting air in your veins. Just need to go to the drugstore, buy a syringe and you're good to go.

The problem is the probability of success.

I didn't even said that the fact of her being a woman. trying to stab herself in the heart has the problem of the breasts, the knife needs to go through the breasts first. Men also have problems due to the fact that they have very tight chests, fit or unfit.

Also a for a more decisive wound, you would need to remove the knife. If you leave it there, it will make pressure and help prevent bloodloss.

So, You need to aim carefully between your ribs, strike with enough strenght for the knife to go through breast/chest muscles, reach the heart, twist the blade and remove it.

Possible? Yes, but very difficult.

Neck is better than chest. It has the 2 pulmonary veins, putting knife there will make bleeding spontaneous will die later. As those 2 veins carry blood to the brain. Its very painful and few people have the power to do that

It was my method a year ago but I failed to do it. So I got SN. Good.

 

[Wrennie]

Can you walk or spend the rest of your life in wheelchair?

Neck is better than chest. It has the 2 pulmonary veins, putting knife there will make bleeding spontaneous will die later. As those 2 veins carry blood to the brain. Its very painful and few people have the power to do that

It was my method a year ago but I failed to do it. So I got SN. Good.

I can limp if it's a short distance, but if it's a long distance I need a wheelchair (but that's also due to me possessing an unrelated condition called POTS which means I can faint whenever I stand up because my blood pressure drops so abruptly & drastically).