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dazed.daydreamer
Member
- Jun 26, 2024
- 27
I'll keep this brief for now, but can elaborate if anyone wants more details. After many years of trying to fix myself and my life, with seasons of suicidal ideation and parasuicidal actions, I've come to the conclusion that committing suicide is the best course of action, for both myself and others. I've thought it through many times over the months and years, and any other reasonable option has fallen through.
Now would be a good time for me to CTB, circumstantially. However, I haven't been able to bring myself to fully complete my preparations or go through with it. I keep procrastinating, distracting myself from directly thinking about it; when I do manage to sit with my reality and this decision for a moment, I'm filled with nondescript dread and anxiety.
I'm logically at peace with the decision and *want* to die, and am frustrated that I haven't done so yet, but the feelings of anxiety and dissociation are getting in the way.
I know I want to die: any advice on overcoming these feelings, the SI?
Now would be a good time for me to CTB, circumstantially. However, I haven't been able to bring myself to fully complete my preparations or go through with it. I keep procrastinating, distracting myself from directly thinking about it; when I do manage to sit with my reality and this decision for a moment, I'm filled with nondescript dread and anxiety.
I'm logically at peace with the decision and *want* to die, and am frustrated that I haven't done so yet, but the feelings of anxiety and dissociation are getting in the way.
I know I want to die: any advice on overcoming these feelings, the SI?