Discussion Opinions on relationships?

[princexhhn]

I've been in a handful because i can't stay alone lol but i wonder what sasu users think of it? For me they're fun as long as I don't take them seriously! I've hurt and been hurt (my ex nearly destroyed my life, it is not a balanced statistic at all.)

 

[Pluto]

 

[Hollowman]

I'm too far gone to handle anything serious even though I want it sometimes.

 

[Forveleth]

I have had a few serious relationships but then I was single for a while and rather happy just vibing. I then met my husband who turned out to be an emotionally abusive asshole. I wish I had just stayed single. Being single gave me the freedom to do whatever, whenever. I had friends that I did things with but I was also content doing things alone as, for me, the experience is the important part.

Relationships are great if you find someone who you are really compatible with and love very much, but I do not see them as a requirement for happiness.

 

[suicidal jirai]

I'd love a relationship, one where i genuinely feel loved and cared for, yet due to all the abusive from previous ex's in which I still have the physical scar... relationships scare me, and I don't know if I could even handle anything serious...

 

[Forever Sleep]

I've never been in a relationship. I wonder if maybe we are influenced by how we were taught to view relationships. Or, how we perceived our parents/ caregivers to view them.

They were always portrayed as something very serious to me- with the end goal being marriage. So, I would have gone into anything, hoping it would be forever! Lol. Probably kind of fairytale naive!

I also went through several bouts of limerence- crazy obsessive crushes on guys which overall, messed me up. So, I've learnt to stay clear of that.

I eventually concluded that casual relationships would just hurt me. Plus, the actual relationships I witnessed around me- family, friends, didn't look entirely appealing either! So, I learnt to be content to be single. If I start wondering, I picture the things that would likely irritate us both or, I refer to things like domestic violence statistics and conclude again- I'm likely better off out of it.

As for other people though, I think- each to their own. As long as people are being upfront about what they want and, no one is getting hurt- then, it's up to them how they want to live and what suits them. What I take exception to is people deceiving one another to get what they want.

I suppose as someone who is seriously considering suicide, I suppose the fairness of getting close to others troubles me. Again, it's different if they know upfront that it's a risk. However, I don't like the idea of people being used and then just abandoned in any context. Either because the other person only really wanted sex (but they didn't realise that) or, because they fancied some company before they died. It just doesn't sit well with me personally.

But then, I am fortunate enough to not really get lonely, so my need for people isn't there so much. So, maybe it's unfair of me to judge.

I also recognise that some people may be more willing to 'recover' if they had someone. That's good but then, it also surely could create a dependency on that person which may also be too demanding for them to sustain. So again- they get the responsibility to try and 'save' that person and the grief/ guilt if they don't/ can't. I personally, wouldn't want to put that on someone. Again though, I'm more lucky in that I don't feel so attracted to the idea now. I really don't think someone could 'save' me now.

 

[Namelesa]

For me nothing in life compares to a relationship and is one of the best feelings in the world. Without one I feel empty. I felt this since my first relationship break up. Tho relationships can be stressful too cus of my fear of abandonment and being paranoid of doing anything wrong and balancing my emotions and needs with my partner. I am currently in another relationship and overall its made my life better so far as I have purpose in pleasing someone else and the other person is comforting and valuing me.

 

[GuyWhoDiesin2025]

(i'm not looking for advice so please don't give it to me...)
I HAVE OFFICIALLY GIVEN UP ON FINDING LOVE WITH ANY LIVING PERSON ON EARTH!

I'm a Gay man who has always tried finding a lover/partner but had absolutely no luck. my interests and myself are so obscure compared to normal people due to my Autism (and a lot of other stuff) that I never have been able to connect with anyone. people slip away from me way too easily. Even though I don't want them to leave, they're ALWAYS the ones who decide to ditch me. It's sad & heartbreaking, but on the bright side, it usually happens VERY FAST, as in one day a guy will like me & talk to me & we'll meet up & then 1-7 days later, he will ghost me.

I'm just existing in the wrong world honestly. People always try to tell me "maybe the problem is you..." How?? i'm always nice to the guys i meet! How the hell can I stop being myself?? Even if I could, I would NEVER want to stop being myself. I WOULD LITERALLY RATHER CEASE TO EXIST THAN BE ANYONE ELSE!

IT'S TOO LATE FOR ME TO FIND THIS BUT: I personally always have wanted a crazy/Obsessive man who would want to become my Lover/Partner. Such as a crazy man who sees a video or picture of me online & then falls madly in love with me (assuming we're sexually compatible) and then he keeps blowing up my phone over & over again & calling me & always wanting to be with me & Always wanting to be close to me... IN ALL OF MY 29 YEARS OF BEING ALIVE, I HAVE NEVER EVEN CAME CLOSE TO FINDING THAT! Despite publicly asking for it & catapulting myself in every single direction!

BUT some other bad stuff has happened to me & it is now too late for me to find a lover/partner, HOWEVER, there is one man who committed suicide back in year 2010 who's spirit has been appearing to me in EVERY SINGLE ONE OF MY DREAMS since I first found his picture online on February 24th 2025 (post about that coming soon...) he's honestly the closest thing I have to a lover/partner, but I don't get to see him as often as I think even though he frequently appears & I always feel him watching me ♥ he still feels very far away ♥ But I know for a fact then when my life is over, him & I will be together in heaven ♥

 

[psp3000]

View attachment 168100

I do not understand romantic relationships or know the purpose of them so I am with Pluto on this ^

(I have never loved a person romantically or maybe even plutonically to my knowledge and have never been in a romantic relationship)

at most all I can observe or what it looks like to me is that people have roommates who have sex with each other and kiss sometimes or that some people have best friends that they kiss and have sex with

and over time the meaning of what a relationship is has changed a lot which can be good or bad and confused me even more

also I recently heard someone say that sex is not so much of an intimate act (besides maybe seeing each other in a birthday suit and doing all the stuff probably) at all

I assume because anyone can do it with anybody

compared to someone knowing things about you that no one else would know or specific things you enjoy which takes effort and again no one else knows, but also it isn't a thing that only happens in romantic relationships

also I'd like to add that people don't know the difference between feeling alone/lonely and wanting to hop into a romantic relationship which also muddles the whole romantic relationship thing for me too

this is probably all a load of gibberish but those are my thoughts on the whole romantic relationship thing

 

[Lapdog6795]

IMO no romantic relationship is meant to work for a very long time, and rarely for a lifetime. We eventually get bored of our partners and our minds naturally seek variety. And saying "I love you" (in a romantic relationship) is just another way of saying "I like having sex with you". Real love (not romantic one, though both can happen together) is generally self-sacrificial in nature and rarely any person will love you this way.

 

[bankai]

I haven't been in a relationship forever. Feeling the way I do(no joy at all)it'll only be a disaster. I think we all have a relationship with ourselves that we need to work on 1st. Only then can we seek a relationship with someone else 'cause otherwise it's never going to work. If you are unhappy alone, you'll be unhappy in a relationship as well. That being said, I'm going to work on getting a few online friends to talk to.

That being said, there are a lot of people who get into relationships and just squeeze what they want out of it. They don't give a damn what happens to the other person. My dad was like that. I vowed to never be like that.

 

[quins]

I didn't "require" conviction before, but threads like these are really just gilding the lily. I've the relatively unique position of never having been in a relationship before, so I can only judge from afar and form ever more senile impressions on it. I imagine if I were younger it would be easier, or maybe not, there would be a certain dissonance in the saccharine rendition of love you see most in young girls today and my own desire to share in that "romance."

 

[Rynalia]

Nope. No way. Miss me.

Getting into a relationship with me is like asking for trouble. A terrible mistake that neither party will recover from. It is soooooo incredibly unhealthy, and I'm 100% the reason.

For the health and wellness for people around me I literally tell them that the healthiest distance they could be from me is friendship or further.

Please and thank you.

 

[wham311]

I was terrible in them. Just not built for them. If it's someone I'm really into I'm needy as fuck, if it's someone that worked hard to get me I was just not a good partner. I cannot apologize enough to the women I was with, I was always terrible.

And I couldn't be alone, so I'm fucked in every outcome.

 

[yxmux]

I've posted several times that I'm disinterested in relationships, but I don't believe I've shared much about how I view them.

Being in a relationship, both as I've realistically imagined and as I've experienced—I'm including all types of relationships, e.g., that of parents—feels existentially suffocating and collapsing. It feels like I am being trapped even further on what my subjective experiences and identity ought to be composed of and what portion of my time, space, and overall self-concept is actually mine and not controlled by the parts of the outside world that I'll never be comfortable participating in or the parts of me that I'll never be comfortable coexisting with, i.e., what makes me feel vulnerable, helpless, inadequate, without intellectual compensation, without an escape, etc. The language I'm using makes it sound complicated, but in short, I feel too exposed.

 

[GuyWhoDiesin2025]

i think it's weird how people also always say "you gotta fix yourself & be your best self before you can get a relationship"...
umm, if everyone was happy by themselves, then why the hell would they need a relationship then?? it's so stupid... yeah, i myself have never been at 100% but that's NOT the reason why so many guys ditched & ghosted me. it was just constant bad luck & hookup culture in the gay community. a guy thinks he likes me but as soon as he notices ONE FLAW he ditches me. happened 100% of the time!