Venting Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

[SilentSadness]

I almost never talk about OCD because it was never diagnosed, but I'm almost certain I have it. I have always performed compulsive behaviour out of irritation, I'm pretty much never comfortable, especially with clothes and my surroundings. Often I will have the same thing in my mind for a very long time and it's impossible to stop thinking about it until enough time passes, especially gore and consumption. I always tire myself out because I have at least ten distractions at once and I'm never satisfied. Despite being tired I can't normally sleep until at least an hour of waiting, normally due to unrest and lack of peace. It's just annoying to me, like a parasite taking my attention every minute of the day. It's just another thing that makes living undesirable, as if things aren't bad already.

 

[NoPoint2Life]

I feel your pain. I am sorry you are going through this. I was diagnosed with severe OCD, the contamination type. It's life consuming. I've made some progress in the last year. But lately I feel like I'm not capable of anymore and I'm doing really weird things like crossing my fingers constantly so I don't know if it's OCD manifesting in a new way.

 

[SilentSadness]

I have been pretty much destroyed by this over the past few days, normally it's manageable I guess but I have been unable to think of anything else recently than horrible stuff. OCD for me is basically just mentally experiencing my worst nightmares over and over again, so no wonder it's causing me so much suffering. I hate this.

 

[Nightfoot]

I have been pretty much destroyed by this over the past few days, normally it's manageable I guess but I have been unable to think of anything else recently than horrible stuff. OCD for me is basically just mentally experiencing my worst nightmares over and over again, so no wonder it's causing me so much suffering. I hate this.

I hope things get better for you and I'm sorry you are suffering.

 

[YandereMikuMistress]

It's exhausting, isn't it,,,Every tiny thing demanding perfect order yup every deviation a miniature catastrophe. Sometimes, the constant mental chatter just becomes too much to bear. Like the universe is mocking your attempts to find some semblance of control... I don't know if I have OCD my dad has it but it doesn't mean I do,, though,, sure fucking feels like like but I donno I already struggle with putting labels on "mental illness" already givin it wasn't something considered really real or with a spectrum growing up..

 

[Eternal Disaster]

I hate this OCD. It is the worst thing about me. Ppl even mock me because of my behaviour caused by OCD. They don't understand it.
Sorry you are going through it.

 

[SilentSadness]

I haven't been able to sleep at all because of OCD. I'll probably have another nightmare when I fall asleep. Full explanation below although you probably shouldn't read it.

Spoiler: Trigger warning: insects.

For the whole day I have been imagining eating large insects such as spiders, scorpions and wasps, over and over again. I imagine myself vomiting to get rid of it but it never goes away. I can feel it in my mouth.