(NSFW) Should i become transgender due to having a ? looking for advice. Please be nice as its a very serious issue for me.

[WorthlessTrash]

Like others have said, I would not recommend this. You can't "choose" to be trans and transitioning only has a chance of helping those with gender dysphoria. If you are content with AGAB or you like being male otherwise, this is not going to help at all. It will just make things worse. Not to mention, you'll go from being prejudiced for one problem, to being prejudiced for a different reason. Being trans is NOT fun and isn't something people should strive to be. It's just something that some are involuntarily.

 

[LoMVLk]

Let me also offer a perspective specifically on transition itself, as a trans woman.

Like others, I believe it would be a bad idea to transition solely for this reason, but this is what you can expect if you decided to do it anyways.

Passing: Although there is movement in the west to reduce the importance of "passing", the reality at the moment is that hate crimes towards anyone perceived as trans are commonplace everywhere. I can't speak for SE Asia, but my assumption would be that it's the same there. Be in the wrong side of town or the wrong side road and you might end up getting beaten up, possibly to death, or raped. So I'm sure we can agree that passing is a safety requirement, at least at the moment.

What does that entail? Transition to the point of passing is a multi-year long, cruel, brutal process. Some get pretty damn close in just two years, some will never be able to in their life. It's probably a lot more emotionally draining for someone who is actually trans, as any sign that they're not passing yet can be incredibly disheartening, making any attempts at learning to pass better soul destroying. These are things you can expect.

Make-up. You'll simply need to learn to do this. It's an incredibly powerful tool that, when used correctly, can even hide face shape reasonably well. Even if you practice every day, it'll probably take a year to get acceptable results. Additionally, online resources are a good start but what you really need to improve is outside perspective: Friends who will take you make-up shopping, help you practice, give you tips, tell you which parts can be improved or what other techniques you might wanna try out, etc. This step is really really difficult without a good support network of women friends. Even then, make-up for trans people can differ slightly from make-up for cis people, so it'd be even better if you have a trans woman or drag queen friend (though drag make-up is of course very very different from normal make-up).

Voice training. Whenever you're out in public places like shops, markets, hanging out with friends, etc. strangers will hear your voice. You'll have to make your voice sound convincingly female. Now, there are some good resources to do this out there, but even when you have all the knowledge and all the tips, learning to actually do it and committing it to muscle memory is once again a multi-year process. It usually takes about 2 years of constant practice for people to get to a point they're happy with. This will require that you're either alone at home or around people who support the transition process to the degree that they won't judge you for trying out what's ultimately going to sound like a very weird and distorted voice around them. You will need to find at least one person you can have conversations with in that voice, otherwise you won't get the practice in that you need. Many trans people opt for a vocal coach which, depending on location, will probably cost you around $200 a month for at least half a year.

Hormones. Not all trans people go on hormones, it's a very personal choice. If you want a female body/face fat distribution, soft skin or natural breast growth, this is your only option though. The cheapest and least safe options start at about $50 per month. Effects will start to become noticeable by others probably by the 1 year mark. At this point, you're probably not ready to present female full-time, so you will need to find a way to hide your breast growth in public. Even then, your breast growth will most likely be very limited - Most trans people will only reach an A cup naturally. I could imagine that bullying for small breasts is also widespread. In that case, you might consider surgery. Plan $20.000.

Bottom surgery. Not all trans people have bottom surgery, it's an even more personal choice. Though in your case, this is ultimately the primary reason you're considering transition. I am assuming here that your goal is to be able to be on the receiving end of penetrative sex. There are different types of bottom surgery. The main one uses penile tissue and requires a certain amount of penile length to work. This one most likely isn't an option for you. The other one uses tissue from your colon to form the vagina. I am not too familiar with the details, but I believe it requires multiple surgeries with some weeks in between, as well as a colostomy to allow for excretion of waste while your intestine isn't attached, then re-attaching of the parts of the colon where the segment was taken, etc. This type of surgery also comes with some unique issues: The tissue is less resistant to damage than vaginal tissue. Rough penetrative sex can tear it, requiring surgery to repair. Self-lubrication does happen to some degree (more than in penile inversion) but most likely you will require a lubricant to have sex. The tissue is also prone to discharge. Developing colon issues can also affect the neovagina (Inflammatory Bowel Disease, Colon Cancer). You will need to dilate (= insert a specifically shaped/sized "dildo" and keep it there for half an hour) more or less daily for about a year after surgery, during which sex is not gonna be possible. (Penile inversion requires dilation for life, though frequency decreases down to once every 2 weeks @ 2 years after surgery). You will have a big scar. Plan $20.000.

Now, these surgeries are very expensive. In some countries, you may be lucky enough to be able to get them on health insurance. This will usually require a year of psychotherapy and a screening during which it will be assessed if you are really trans. Based on what you wrote, I assume that you are not. That means, no funding for you. Unless: You can pretend to be trans well enough to a psychologist for a year for them to be convinced you're actually trans. If you can do this, you might be able to get surgeries paid for at some point within the next 5 years. You will also get hormones paid for (after the 1-2 year assessment process). The only thing to consider here is that, because in many places this system is really underfunded and shit, you're essentially taking this funding away from a trans person. Though, if it was actually able to fix your mental health issues, I'd consider that entirely valid.

There are also many other points I haven't mentioned like your family probably disowning you and losing all your friends etc.

Then there are the emotional repercussions, specifically re gender dysphoria. You'll force yourself to live the lie that makes trans people transition in the first place. The make-up and fashion etc. will be a similar (though less over the top) process to becoming a drag queen - except you'll have to pretend to be someone you're not 24/7 instead of just as a character for a show. I don't know what your sexuality is, if you're bisexual and a bottom you'll be fine, but if you're a straight man you won't have any desire to engage in the sex acts you have now enabled yourself to have. You might want to live as a lesbian, which sounds like the perfect solution - but then why go through bottom surgery in the first place?

I believe you're looking at this the wrong way. If living with a micropenis is entirely unbearable to you, instead of looking at a sex change to female, look at sex changes from female to male. Trans men are in a similar situation to you - Many of them want a penis that can perform penetrative sex. Testosterone enlarges the clitoris into what is essentially a micropenis. Surgery exists that uses a skin graft, e.g. from thigh or arm around a cylindrical implant to shape the penis, moving the clitoris (or head of the micropenis) to the top. The implant can inflate and deflate with a pump, which, in the case of trans men, is usually inside of the scrotum - Squeeze one "testicle" to enlarge it until it's hard enough to have sex with, squeeze the other to deflate it. There are papers on a similar surgery method being used on men with a micropenis. Here's one such paper (though remember, post-surgery photos show a wound that is healing which of course will look a lot more raw than the final healed product): https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4708208/

I think, as crappy as it is, it's important not to internalise the things you hear from bullies. Like for example the "How will you pleasure a woman with a micropenis?". That's obviously a really dumb point. Most women don't derive much pleasure from penetrative sex. Studies over studies show that the most satisfied women are the ones in lesbian relationships. And most lesbians don't have a penis. The least satisfied women are the ones in relationships with cis straight men. That's because of all these men with the macho mindset that using their penis is all they have to do to pleasure a woman. The reality is, fingering and oral sex are the things that women actually enjoy. Or things like "You're not a real man". What makes a man a man in most cultures is not their penis. What makes them a man is providing for their family, being strong, stoic, supportive, kind and giving. Those are all features you can have. There's a new movement among young people in the West that goes even further than that. They believe what makes you a man is: Nothing. Being a man doesn't mean anything. It's nothing but outdated gender norms derived from physiology that was relevant thousands of years ago but makes no sense nowadays. There's nothing that says men need to be strong, other than that's what we're taught by society. But there's no logical basis for this.

I don't know if you're trans or not, maybe you will find out in a few years that this desire for bottom surgery actually comes from gender dysphoria. But as things stand right now, you're a man. You're just as much of a man (and honestly even moreso) than the people bullying you, because bullying is not something the ideal man does.

I know shit like this is really difficult to deal with when it's your lived experience. But maybe you can find a way to get away from these toxic people. They seem to be the posterboys of toxic masculinity. That's exactly the kind of shit feminism is fighting. Try to build a friend group that accepts you the way you are. I think any sort of feminist movement or organisation will absolutely do that.

I hope things get better for you.

 

[MicropBaldCurrycel]

Like others have said, I would not recommend this. You can't "choose" to be trans and transitioning only has a chance of helping those with gender dysphoria. If you are content with AGAB or you like being male otherwise, this is not going to help at all. It will just make things worse. Not to mention, you'll go from being prejudiced for one problem, to being prejudiced for a different reason. Being trans is NOT fun and isn't something people should strive to be. It's just something that some are involuntarily.

yes i know you my friend u r one of my fav users, i think of you and wish you would do it for yourself but i know you feel its not the same as being Cis.

Sorry you going through that and i understand you.

Let me also offer a perspective specifically on transition itself, as a trans woman.

Like others, I believe it would be a bad idea to transition solely for this reason, but this is what you can expect if you decided to do it anyways.

Passing: Although there is movement in the west to reduce the importance of "passing", the reality at the moment is that hate crimes towards anyone perceived as trans are commonplace everywhere. I can't speak for SE Asia, but my assumption would be that it's the same there. Be in the wrong side of town or the wrong side road and you might end up getting beaten up, possibly to death, or raped. So I'm sure we can agree that passing is a safety requirement, at least at the moment.

What does that entail? Transition to the point of passing is a multi-year long, cruel, brutal process. Some get pretty damn close in just two years, some will never be able to in their life. It's probably a lot more emotionally draining for someone who is actually trans, as any sign that they're not passing yet can be incredibly disheartening, making any attempts at learning to pass better soul destroying. These are things you can expect.

Make-up. You'll simply need to learn to do this. It's an incredibly powerful tool that, when used correctly, can even hide face shape reasonably well. Even if you practice every day, it'll probably take a year to get acceptable results. Additionally, online resources are a good start but what you really need to improve is outside perspective: Friends who will take you make-up shopping, help you practice, give you tips, tell you which parts can be improved or what other techniques you might wanna try out, etc. This step is really really difficult without a good support network of women friends. Even then, make-up for trans people can differ slightly from make-up for cis people, so it'd be even better if you have a trans woman or drag queen friend (though drag make-up is of course very very different from normal make-up).

Voice training. Whenever you're out in public places like shops, markets, hanging out with friends, etc. strangers will hear your voice. You'll have to make your voice sound convincingly female. Now, there are some good resources to do this out there, but even when you have all the knowledge and all the tips, learning to actually do it and committing it to muscle memory is once again a multi-year process. It usually takes about 2 years of constant practice for people to get to a point they're happy with. This will require that you're either alone at home or around people who support the transition process to the degree that they won't judge you for trying out what's ultimately going to sound like a very weird and distorted voice around them. You will need to find at least one person you can have conversations with in that voice, otherwise you won't get the practice in that you need. Many trans people opt for a vocal coach which, depending on location, will probably cost you around $200 a month for at least half a year.

Hormones. Not all trans people go on hormones, it's a very personal choice. If you want a female body/face fat distribution, soft skin or natural breast growth, this is your only option though. The cheapest and least safe options start at about $50 per month. Effects will start to become noticeable by others probably by the 1 year mark. At this point, you're probably not ready to present female full-time, so you will need to find a way to hide your breast growth in public. Even then, your breast growth will most likely be very limited - Most trans people will only reach an A cup naturally. I could imagine that bullying for small breasts is also widespread. In that case, you might consider surgery. Plan $20.000.

Bottom surgery. Not all trans people have bottom surgery, it's an even more personal choice. Though in your case, this is ultimately the primary reason you're considering transition. I am assuming here that your goal is to be able to be on the receiving end of penetrative sex. There are different types of bottom surgery. The main one uses penile tissue and requires a certain amount of penile length to work. This one most likely isn't an option for you. The other one uses tissue from your colon to form the vagina. I am not too familiar with the details, but I believe it requires multiple surgeries with some weeks in between, as well as a colostomy to allow for excretion of waste while your intestine isn't attached, then re-attaching of the parts of the colon where the segment was taken, etc. This type of surgery also comes with some unique issues: The tissue is less resistant to damage than vaginal tissue. Rough penetrative sex can tear it, requiring surgery to repair. Self-lubrication does happen to some degree (more than in penile inversion) but most likely you will require a lubricant to have sex. The tissue is also prone to discharge. Developing colon issues can also affect the neovagina (Inflammatory Bowel Disease, Colon Cancer). You will need to dilate (= insert a specifically shaped/sized "dildo" and keep it there for half an hour) more or less daily for about a year after surgery, during which sex is not gonna be possible. (Penile inversion requires dilation for life, though frequency decreases down to once every 2 weeks @ 2 years after surgery). You will have a big scar. Plan $20.000.

Now, these surgeries are very expensive. In some countries, you may be lucky enough to be able to get them on health insurance. This will usually require a year of psychotherapy and a screening during which it will be assessed if you are really trans. Based on what you wrote, I assume that you are not. That means, no funding for you. Unless: You can pretend to be trans well enough to a psychologist for a year for them to be convinced you're actually trans. If you can do this, you might be able to get surgeries paid for at some point within the next 5 years. You will also get hormones paid for (after the 1-2 year assessment process). The only thing to consider here is that, because in many places this system is really underfunded and shit, you're essentially taking this funding away from a trans person. Though, if it was actually able to fix your mental health issues, I'd consider that entirely valid.

There are also many other points I haven't mentioned like your family probably disowning you and losing all your friends etc.

Then there are the emotional repercussions, specifically re gender dysphoria. You'll force yourself to live the lie that makes trans people transition in the first place. The make-up and fashion etc. will be a similar (though less over the top) process to becoming a drag queen - except you'll have to pretend to be someone you're not 24/7 instead of just as a character for a show. I don't know what your sexuality is, if you're bisexual and a bottom you'll be fine, but if you're a straight man you won't have any desire to engage in the sex acts you have now enabled yourself to have. You might want to live as a lesbian, which sounds like the perfect solution - but then why go through bottom surgery in the first place?

I believe you're looking at this the wrong way. If living with a micropenis is entirely unbearable to you, instead of looking at a sex change to female, look at sex changes from female to male. Trans men are in a similar situation to you - Many of them want a penis that can perform penetrative sex. Testosterone enlarges the clitoris into what is essentially a micropenis. Surgery exists that uses a skin graft, e.g. from thigh or arm around a cylindrical implant to shape the penis, moving the clitoris (or head of the micropenis) to the top. The implant can inflate and deflate with a pump, which, in the case of trans men, is usually inside of the scrotum - Squeeze one "testicle" to enlarge it until it's hard enough to have sex with, squeeze the other to deflate it. There are papers on a similar surgery method being used on men with a micropenis. Here's one such paper (though remember, post-surgery photos show a wound that is healing which of course will look a lot more raw than the final healed product): https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4708208/

I think, as crappy as it is, it's important not to internalise the things you hear from bullies. Like for example the "How will you pleasure a woman with a micropenis?". That's obviously a really dumb point. Most women don't derive much pleasure from penetrative sex. Studies over studies show that the most satisfied women are the ones in lesbian relationships. And most lesbians don't have a penis. The least satisfied women are the ones in relationships with cis straight men. That's because of all these men with the macho mindset that using their penis is all they have to do to pleasure a woman. The reality is, fingering and oral sex are the things that women actually enjoy. Or things like "You're not a real man". What makes a man a man in most cultures is not their penis. What makes them a man is providing for their family, being strong, stoic, supportive, kind and giving. Those are all features you can have. There's a new movement among young people in the West that goes even further than that. They believe what makes you a man is: Nothing. Being a man doesn't mean anything. It's nothing but outdated gender norms derived from physiology that was relevant thousands of years ago but makes no sense nowadays. There's nothing that says men need to be strong, other than that's what we're taught by society. But there's no logical basis for this.

I don't know if you're trans or not, maybe you will find out in a few years that this desire for bottom surgery actually comes from gender dysphoria. But as things stand right now, you're a man. You're just as much of a man (and honestly even moreso) than the people bullying you, because bullying is not something the ideal man does.

I know shit like this is really difficult to deal with when it's your lived experience. But maybe you can find a way to get away from these toxic people. They seem to be the posterboys of toxic masculinity. That's exactly the kind of shit feminism is fighting. Try to build a friend group that accepts you the way you are. I think any sort of feminist movement or organisation will absolutely do that.

I hope things get better for you.

wow this is a great response i dont even know what to say.
i read it all
Yes you right transitioning is a long journey.
and im so bad with my hands i dont think i could do makeup good.
those surgeries are expensive.
One day id love to go for the surgery you mentioned about cutting a skin of flap and implant the shape to the penis.
also the idea of having a vagina appeals to me, man with a vagina? lol
but yeah thanks alot and i know women like fingers and oral and some prefer other methods than penetration.
thanks for saying im a Man.
I get what you saying about toxic masculannity.

you should become a therapist or counsellor u r good at this.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

yes i know you my friend u r one of my fav users, i think of you and wish you would do it for yourself but i know you feel its not the same as being Cis.

I appreciate that. Unfortunately, I know with absolute certainty I would still feel suicidal and would want to CTB. Missing out on young womanhood, having to dilate for life and take hormones for life on top of the chance of not passing, painful surgeries and 5+ years in limbo. I would still resent and be jealous of attractive cis females. It really wouldn't make a difference for me, because admittedly I am a vein person who cares about looks and other's perceptions and I am not willing to change that. Different people have different reasons for wanting to be the opposite sex/gender and different goals in regards to transitioning, and mine are very vein.

 

[Alex6216]

Wtf no.
Why would you even want to do that?

 

[MicropBaldCurrycel]

I appreciate that. Unfortunately, I know with absolute certainty I would still feel suicidal and would want to CTB. Missing out on young womanhood, having to dilate for life and take hormones for life on top of the chance of not passing, painful surgeries and 5+ years in limbo. I would still resent and be jealous of attractive cis females. It really wouldn't make a difference for me, because admittedly I am a vein person who cares about looks and other's perceptions and I am not willing to change that. Different people have different reasons for wanting to be the opposite sex/gender and different goals in regards to transitioning, and mine are very vein.

I understand i think all humans are vain some just hide it .

Wtf no.
Why would you even want to do that?

because right now no dick=no women

Boobs and vagina=some Lesbian and bi women.

that was my reasoning anyhow.

 

[rationaltake]

This thread has been really interesting. I hope you find a way forward. I hate the body I have for very different reasons to you and it's ruined my whole life.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I'm sorry, but you cannot make yourself into something you are not. It's not a decision to become transgender, it's what one is. And FYI, people who are truly transgender don't decide to make themselves transgender, they decide to align their bodies with their essences. MTF transgenders want their bodies to be female, completely and totally. Since that is not possible, they strive to get as close to that as science will allow to the point of what is acceptable to them. I understand how you think it may help "solve" your problem, but you are not going to be happy, or fulfilled, and certainly not "whole" by changing your gender, if you inherently don't feel you are the other gender. Does your "brain" feel female to you? Is every fiber of your being telling you that you are female? From what I've read in your other posts, you never mentioned that you feel like you are trapped in the wrong body, per say, like your essence is female while your body is male. It may fix your anatomy "problem", but you would be creating another problem for yourself, which, I'd argue, is an even bigger problem where your essence knows it is male, but your body will be female.

 

[thinkkank]

if you're not trans i strongly advise against transitioning. it's a really big change and should only be done if you feel you are in the wrong body. transitioning would make things worse i'd think

 

[TheLastFemaphrodyke]

Let me also offer a perspective specifically on transition itself, as a trans woman.

Like others, I believe it would be a bad idea to transition solely for this reason, but this is what you can expect if you decided to do it anyways.

Passing: Although there is movement in the west to reduce the importance of "passing", the reality at the moment is that hate crimes towards anyone perceived as trans are commonplace everywhere. I can't speak for SE Asia, but my assumption would be that it's the same there. Be in the wrong side of town or the wrong side road and you might end up getting beaten up, possibly to death, or raped. So I'm sure we can agree that passing is a safety requirement, at least at the moment.

What does that entail? Transition to the point of passing is a multi-year long, cruel, brutal process. Some get pretty damn close in just two years, some will never be able to in their life. It's probably a lot more emotionally draining for someone who is actually trans, as any sign that they're not passing yet can be incredibly disheartening, making any attempts at learning to pass better soul destroying. These are things you can expect.

Make-up. You'll simply need to learn to do this. It's an incredibly powerful tool that, when used correctly, can even hide face shape reasonably well. Even if you practice every day, it'll probably take a year to get acceptable results. Additionally, online resources are a good start but what you really need to improve is outside perspective: Friends who will take you make-up shopping, help you practice, give you tips, tell you which parts can be improved or what other techniques you might wanna try out, etc. This step is really really difficult without a good support network of women friends. Even then, make-up for trans people can differ slightly from make-up for cis people, so it'd be even better if you have a trans woman or drag queen friend (though drag make-up is of course very very different from normal make-up).

Voice training. Whenever you're out in public places like shops, markets, hanging out with friends, etc. strangers will hear your voice. You'll have to make your voice sound convincingly female. Now, there are some good resources to do this out there, but even when you have all the knowledge and all the tips, learning to actually do it and committing it to muscle memory is once again a multi-year process. It usually takes about 2 years of constant practice for people to get to a point they're happy with. This will require that you're either alone at home or around people who support the transition process to the degree that they won't judge you for trying out what's ultimately going to sound like a very weird and distorted voice around them. You will need to find at least one person you can have conversations with in that voice, otherwise you won't get the practice in that you need. Many trans people opt for a vocal coach which, depending on location, will probably cost you around $200 a month for at least half a year.

Hormones. Not all trans people go on hormones, it's a very personal choice. If you want a female body/face fat distribution, soft skin or natural breast growth, this is your only option though. The cheapest and least safe options start at about $50 per month. Effects will start to become noticeable by others probably by the 1 year mark. At this point, you're probably not ready to present female full-time, so you will need to find a way to hide your breast growth in public. Even then, your breast growth will most likely be very limited - Most trans people will only reach an A cup naturally. I could imagine that bullying for small breasts is also widespread. In that case, you might consider surgery. Plan $20.000.

Bottom surgery. Not all trans people have bottom surgery, it's an even more personal choice. Though in your case, this is ultimately the primary reason you're considering transition. I am assuming here that your goal is to be able to be on the receiving end of penetrative sex. There are different types of bottom surgery. The main one uses penile tissue and requires a certain amount of penile length to work. This one most likely isn't an option for you. The other one uses tissue from your colon to form the vagina. I am not too familiar with the details, but I believe it requires multiple surgeries with some weeks in between, as well as a colostomy to allow for excretion of waste while your intestine isn't attached, then re-attaching of the parts of the colon where the segment was taken, etc. This type of surgery also comes with some unique issues: The tissue is less resistant to damage than vaginal tissue. Rough penetrative sex can tear it, requiring surgery to repair. Self-lubrication does happen to some degree (more than in penile inversion) but most likely you will require a lubricant to have sex. The tissue is also prone to discharge. Developing colon issues can also affect the neovagina (Inflammatory Bowel Disease, Colon Cancer). You will need to dilate (= insert a specifically shaped/sized "dildo" and keep it there for half an hour) more or less daily for about a year after surgery, during which sex is not gonna be possible. (Penile inversion requires dilation for life, though frequency decreases down to once every 2 weeks @ 2 years after surgery). You will have a big scar. Plan $20.000.

Now, these surgeries are very expensive. In some countries, you may be lucky enough to be able to get them on health insurance. This will usually require a year of psychotherapy and a screening during which it will be assessed if you are really trans. Based on what you wrote, I assume that you are not. That means, no funding for you. Unless: You can pretend to be trans well enough to a psychologist for a year for them to be convinced you're actually trans. If you can do this, you might be able to get surgeries paid for at some point within the next 5 years. You will also get hormones paid for (after the 1-2 year assessment process). The only thing to consider here is that, because in many places this system is really underfunded and shit, you're essentially taking this funding away from a trans person. Though, if it was actually able to fix your mental health issues, I'd consider that entirely valid.

There are also many other points I haven't mentioned like your family probably disowning you and losing all your friends etc.

Then there are the emotional repercussions, specifically re gender dysphoria. You'll force yourself to live the lie that makes trans people transition in the first place. The make-up and fashion etc. will be a similar (though less over the top) process to becoming a drag queen - except you'll have to pretend to be someone you're not 24/7 instead of just as a character for a show. I don't know what your sexuality is, if you're bisexual and a bottom you'll be fine, but if you're a straight man you won't have any desire to engage in the sex acts you have now enabled yourself to have. You might want to live as a lesbian, which sounds like the perfect solution - but then why go through bottom surgery in the first place?

I believe you're looking at this the wrong way. If living with a micropenis is entirely unbearable to you, instead of looking at a sex change to female, look at sex changes from female to male. Trans men are in a similar situation to you - Many of them want a penis that can perform penetrative sex. Testosterone enlarges the clitoris into what is essentially a micropenis. Surgery exists that uses a skin graft, e.g. from thigh or arm around a cylindrical implant to shape the penis, moving the clitoris (or head of the micropenis) to the top. The implant can inflate and deflate with a pump, which, in the case of trans men, is usually inside of the scrotum - Squeeze one "testicle" to enlarge it until it's hard enough to have sex with, squeeze the other to deflate it. There are papers on a similar surgery method being used on men with a micropenis. Here's one such paper (though remember, post-surgery photos show a wound that is healing which of course will look a lot more raw than the final healed product): https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4708208/

I think, as crappy as it is, it's important not to internalise the things you hear from bullies. Like for example the "How will you pleasure a woman with a micropenis?". That's obviously a really dumb point. Most women don't derive much pleasure from penetrative sex. Studies over studies show that the most satisfied women are the ones in lesbian relationships. And most lesbians don't have a penis. The least satisfied women are the ones in relationships with cis straight men. That's because of all these men with the macho mindset that using their penis is all they have to do to pleasure a woman. The reality is, fingering and oral sex are the things that women actually enjoy. Or things like "You're not a real man". What makes a man a man in most cultures is not their penis. What makes them a man is providing for their family, being strong, stoic, supportive, kind and giving. Those are all features you can have. There's a new movement among young people in the West that goes even further than that. They believe what makes you a man is: Nothing. Being a man doesn't mean anything. It's nothing but outdated gender norms derived from physiology that was relevant thousands of years ago but makes no sense nowadays. There's nothing that says men need to be strong, other than that's what we're taught by society. But there's no logical basis for this.

I don't know if you're trans or not, maybe you will find out in a few years that this desire for bottom surgery actually comes from gender dysphoria. But as things stand right now, you're a man. You're just as much of a man (and honestly even moreso) than the people bullying you, because bullying is not something the ideal man does.

I know shit like this is really difficult to deal with when it's your lived experience. But maybe you can find a way to get away from these toxic people. They seem to be the posterboys of toxic masculinity. That's exactly the kind of shit feminism is fighting. Try to build a friend group that accepts you the way you are. I think any sort of feminist movement or organisation will absolutely do that.

I hope things get better for you.

Sound advice here. Personally I would love to talk with this responder as I have my own issues. IMHO, unless you 'feel' as if you are a woman, a real woman, with the desire to be acknowledged as such, then transitioning may be a pandoras box or can of worms best left for gardeners and other mythical heros.

Like others have said, I would not recommend this. You can't "choose" to be trans and transitioning only has a chance of helping those with gender dysphoria. If you are content with AGAB or you like being male otherwise, this is not going to help at all. It will just make things worse. Not to mention, you'll go from being prejudiced for one problem, to being prejudiced for a different reason. Being trans is NOT fun and isn't something people should strive to be. It's just something that some are involuntarily

Transitioning is a monumentous change. I have NO friends or family, were I to change it would be the easiest of all, I have already lost everyone in my life. I am utterly and completely alone. Yet I can still imagine how how devastating each look from every familiar place and face would effect me, if you have one single friend or family, what you do, effects not only you, but everyone around you and eventually, others around them as well quite possibly. You have to be prepared to loose everything and everyone.

 

[Niko66]

Let me also offer a perspective specifically on transition itself, as a trans woman.

Like others, I believe it would be a bad idea to transition solely for this reason, but this is what you can expect if you decided to do it anyways.

Passing: Although there is movement in the west to reduce the importance of "passing", the reality at the moment is that hate crimes towards anyone perceived as trans are commonplace everywhere. I can't speak for SE Asia, but my assumption would be that it's the same there. Be in the wrong side of town or the wrong side road and you might end up getting beaten up, possibly to death, or raped. So I'm sure we can agree that passing is a safety requirement, at least at the moment.

What does that entail? Transition to the point of passing is a multi-year long, cruel, brutal process. Some get pretty damn close in just two years, some will never be able to in their life. It's probably a lot more emotionally draining for someone who is actually trans, as any sign that they're not passing yet can be incredibly disheartening, making any attempts at learning to pass better soul destroying. These are things you can expect.

Make-up. You'll simply need to learn to do this. It's an incredibly powerful tool that, when used correctly, can even hide face shape reasonably well. Even if you practice every day, it'll probably take a year to get acceptable results. Additionally, online resources are a good start but what you really need to improve is outside perspective: Friends who will take you make-up shopping, help you practice, give you tips, tell you which parts can be improved or what other techniques you might wanna try out, etc. This step is really really difficult without a good support network of women friends. Even then, make-up for trans people can differ slightly from make-up for cis people, so it'd be even better if you have a trans woman or drag queen friend (though drag make-up is of course very very different from normal make-up).

Voice training. Whenever you're out in public places like shops, markets, hanging out with friends, etc. strangers will hear your voice. You'll have to make your voice sound convincingly female. Now, there are some good resources to do this out there, but even when you have all the knowledge and all the tips, learning to actually do it and committing it to muscle memory is once again a multi-year process. It usually takes about 2 years of constant practice for people to get to a point they're happy with. This will require that you're either alone at home or around people who support the transition process to the degree that they won't judge you for trying out what's ultimately going to sound like a very weird and distorted voice around them. You will need to find at least one person you can have conversations with in that voice, otherwise you won't get the practice in that you need. Many trans people opt for a vocal coach which, depending on location, will probably cost you around $200 a month for at least half a year.

Hormones. Not all trans people go on hormones, it's a very personal choice. If you want a female body/face fat distribution, soft skin or natural breast growth, this is your only option though. The cheapest and least safe options start at about $50 per month. Effects will start to become noticeable by others probably by the 1 year mark. At this point, you're probably not ready to present female full-time, so you will need to find a way to hide your breast growth in public. Even then, your breast growth will most likely be very limited - Most trans people will only reach an A cup naturally. I could imagine that bullying for small breasts is also widespread. In that case, you might consider surgery. Plan $20.000.

Bottom surgery. Not all trans people have bottom surgery, it's an even more personal choice. Though in your case, this is ultimately the primary reason you're considering transition. I am assuming here that your goal is to be able to be on the receiving end of penetrative sex. There are different types of bottom surgery. The main one uses penile tissue and requires a certain amount of penile length to work. This one most likely isn't an option for you. The other one uses tissue from your colon to form the vagina. I am not too familiar with the details, but I believe it requires multiple surgeries with some weeks in between, as well as a colostomy to allow for excretion of waste while your intestine isn't attached, then re-attaching of the parts of the colon where the segment was taken, etc. This type of surgery also comes with some unique issues: The tissue is less resistant to damage than vaginal tissue. Rough penetrative sex can tear it, requiring surgery to repair. Self-lubrication does happen to some degree (more than in penile inversion) but most likely you will require a lubricant to have sex. The tissue is also prone to discharge. Developing colon issues can also affect the neovagina (Inflammatory Bowel Disease, Colon Cancer). You will need to dilate (= insert a specifically shaped/sized "dildo" and keep it there for half an hour) more or less daily for about a year after surgery, during which sex is not gonna be possible. (Penile inversion requires dilation for life, though frequency decreases down to once every 2 weeks @ 2 years after surgery). You will have a big scar. Plan $20.000.

Now, these surgeries are very expensive. In some countries, you may be lucky enough to be able to get them on health insurance. This will usually require a year of psychotherapy and a screening during which it will be assessed if you are really trans. Based on what you wrote, I assume that you are not. That means, no funding for you. Unless: You can pretend to be trans well enough to a psychologist for a year for them to be convinced you're actually trans. If you can do this, you might be able to get surgeries paid for at some point within the next 5 years. You will also get hormones paid for (after the 1-2 year assessment process). The only thing to consider here is that, because in many places this system is really underfunded and shit, you're essentially taking this funding away from a trans person. Though, if it was actually able to fix your mental health issues, I'd consider that entirely valid.

There are also many other points I haven't mentioned like your family probably disowning you and losing all your friends etc.

Then there are the emotional repercussions, specifically re gender dysphoria. You'll force yourself to live the lie that makes trans people transition in the first place. The make-up and fashion etc. will be a similar (though less over the top) process to becoming a drag queen - except you'll have to pretend to be someone you're not 24/7 instead of just as a character for a show. I don't know what your sexuality is, if you're bisexual and a bottom you'll be fine, but if you're a straight man you won't have any desire to engage in the sex acts you have now enabled yourself to have. You might want to live as a lesbian, which sounds like the perfect solution - but then why go through bottom surgery in the first place?

I believe you're looking at this the wrong way. If living with a micropenis is entirely unbearable to you, instead of looking at a sex change to female, look at sex changes from female to male. Trans men are in a similar situation to you - Many of them want a penis that can perform penetrative sex. Testosterone enlarges the clitoris into what is essentially a micropenis. Surgery exists that uses a skin graft, e.g. from thigh or arm around a cylindrical implant to shape the penis, moving the clitoris (or head of the micropenis) to the top. The implant can inflate and deflate with a pump, which, in the case of trans men, is usually inside of the scrotum - Squeeze one "testicle" to enlarge it until it's hard enough to have sex with, squeeze the other to deflate it. There are papers on a similar surgery method being used on men with a micropenis. Here's one such paper (though remember, post-surgery photos show a wound that is healing which of course will look a lot more raw than the final healed product): https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4708208/

I think, as crappy as it is, it's important not to internalise the things you hear from bullies. Like for example the "How will you pleasure a woman with a micropenis?". That's obviously a really dumb point. Most women don't derive much pleasure from penetrative sex. Studies over studies show that the most satisfied women are the ones in lesbian relationships. And most lesbians don't have a penis. The least satisfied women are the ones in relationships with cis straight men. That's because of all these men with the macho mindset that using their penis is all they have to do to pleasure a woman. The reality is, fingering and oral sex are the things that women actually enjoy. Or things like "You're not a real man". What makes a man a man in most cultures is not their penis. What makes them a man is providing for their family, being strong, stoic, supportive, kind and giving. Those are all features you can have. There's a new movement among young people in the West that goes even further than that. They believe what makes you a man is: Nothing. Being a man doesn't mean anything. It's nothing but outdated gender norms derived from physiology that was relevant thousands of years ago but makes no sense nowadays. There's nothing that says men need to be strong, other than that's what we're taught by society. But there's no logical basis for this.

I don't know if you're trans or not, maybe you will find out in a few years that this desire for bottom surgery actually comes from gender dysphoria. But as things stand right now, you're a man. You're just as much of a man (and honestly even moreso) than the people bullying you, because bullying is not something the ideal man does.

I know shit like this is really difficult to deal with when it's your lived experience. But maybe you can find a way to get away from these toxic people. They seem to be the posterboys of toxic masculinity. That's exactly the kind of shit feminism is fighting. Try to build a friend group that accepts you the way you are. I think any sort of feminist movement or organisation will absolutely do that.

I hope things get better for you.

Absolutely wonderful and educational response like others have said, I wish I could like it twice. Hope you are doing ok on your transition .

 

[MicropBaldCurrycel]

Sound advice here. Personally I would love to talk with this responder as I have my own issues. IMHO, unless you 'feel' as if you are a woman, a real woman, with the desire to be acknowledged as such, then transitioning may be a pandoras box or can of worms best left for gardeners and other mythical heros.


Transitioning is a monumentous change. I have NO friends or family, were I to change it would be the easiest of all, I have already lost everyone in my life. I am utterly and completely alone. Yet I can still imagine how how devastating each look from every familiar place and face would effect me, if you have one single friend or family, what you do, effects not only you, but everyone around you and eventually, others around them as well quite possibly. You have to be prepared to loose everything and everyone.

thank you yes after the advice on this thread i decided not to go through with it and rather look and phalloplasty and implant options .

im sorry you had such a negative response from your friends and family, i am your friend ok i mean it you can dm me anytime just for a chat.things will get better, hugz

 

[LoMVLk]

Sound advice here. Personally I would love to talk with this responder as I have my own issues. IMHO, unless you 'feel' as if you are a woman, a real woman, with the desire to be acknowledged as such, then transitioning may be a pandoras box or can of worms best left for gardeners and other mythical heros.

I'd definitely be up for a chat, only thing is I can't private message until I have 10 comments I believe. That might take a couple of weeks considering my comments tend to be entire novels. But feel free to bookmark my name/profile link or so. I'll try to send you a DM then but my memory is terrible.

 

[rationaltake]

I'd definitely be up for a chat, only thing is I can't private message until I have 10 comments I believe. That might take a couple of weeks considering my comments tend to be entire novels. But feel free to bookmark my name/profile link or so. I'll try to send you a DM then but my memory is terrible.

That's what the game threads are for ha ha. I think they still count?

 

[TheLastFemaphrodyke]

thank you yes after the advice on this thread i decided not to go through with it and rather look and phalloplasty and implant options .

im sorry you had such a negative response from your friends and family, i am your friend ok i mean it you can dm me anytime just for a chat.things will get better, hugz

I am happy for you

 

[LoMVLk]

I am happy for you

Sorry to hijack this post but I am at 10 now.

 

[TheLastFemaphrodyke]

Sorry to hijack this post but I am at 10 now.

I am happy that you have decided NOT to put yourself through more trauma than needed to overcome what you feel you need to. I am NOT happy you at a 10, I am at an 8 and it is not nice or good and I was hoping to help and not worsen, thanx for hijacking and showing me me stupidity by being too brief

I am happy that you have decided NOT to put yourself through more trauma than needed to overcome what you feel you need to. I am NOT happy you at a 10, I am at an 8 and it is not nice or good and I was hoping to help and not worsen, thanx for hijacking and showing me me stupidity by being too brief

I am here if you need to vent or just not be alone

 

[LoMVLk]

I am happy that you have decided NOT to put yourself through more trauma than needed to overcome what you feel you need to. I am NOT happy you at a 10, I am at an 8 and it is not nice or good and I was hoping to help and not worsen, thanx for hijacking and showing me me stupidity by being too brief

Sorry there was a miscommunication - We talked earlier about private messaging which required me to have 10 posts! I do now, so my DMs are open for you.

 

[TheLastFemaphrodyke]

I am happy that you have decided NOT to put yourself through more trauma than needed to overcome what you feel you need to. I am NOT happy you at a 10, I am at an 8 and it is not nice or good and I was hoping to help and not worsen, thanx for hijacking and showing me me stupidity by being too brief

I am here if you need to vent or just not be alone

I really have been thinking of you since I read the post the other day and was so worried transitioning would be such a hard thing for someone that may not truly want to transition but only is because they feel they must. To me, that would be even worse than having to stay what your body is when you do not feel you are what your body is. I am sorry if I overstepped.

Sorry there was a miscommunication - We talked earlier about private messaging which required me to have 10 posts! I do now, so my DMs are open for you.

do not know if my dms are open yet, I just joined the other day, now do I find out, gawd I am such a non techy

 

[MicropBaldCurrycel]

I really have been thinking of you since I read the post the other day and was so worried transitioning would be such a hard thing for someone that may not truly want to transition but only is because they feel they must.

thats exactly my reasoning , i feel to be normal and have a chance at sex and love i must do it but from the replies here its not a good idea.

 

[wait.what]

man with a vagina? lol

Stranger things have happened. ;) I am sorry that people have been so stupid and cruel to you. I hope that someday you can get those mean voices in your head to shut up. Nobody needs bullies living rent-free in their minds. At one time, my head was filled with mean stuff kids had said to me in grade school. I was in my early thirties, for pity's sake. How long can someone let a bunch of schoolchildren haunt them? There's a helpful technique used in cognitive behavior therapy (CBT, not to be confused with CTB, or the other CBT, which stands for "cock and ball torture." You really need to make sure you get the right CBT.)

Anyway--the idea is that every time you think something horrible about yourself, you stop and replace that thought with something more realistic. Like if you notice yourself thinking, "I'm the ugliest man alive!" You could try thinking, "You know what? Half the people on Earth are below-average in looks. Fifty percent of those homely people will be women. People tend to pair up with partners who are in the same general range with regard to looks. So who are these plain ladies going to be dating? Probably not Prince Charming, quite honestly, unless they (the women) are insanely rich. There are a lot of women out there who may not be beautiful, but who are kind, intelligent, and loving. If you are kind, intelligent and loving to them, I don't think it would be hard to find someone." I mean, okay, that's kind of a long example, but the idea is to try to get a mental image of yourself that is more an honest reflection of you, instead of a funhouse-mirror grotesque image.

Also, for the record, I am a man with a vagina. I am well aware that most people on earth loathe people like me and want us dead or in prison, or preferably both. That fact delayed my transition by 25 years, but I did eventually do it. And honestly, I don't give a damn whether the pope, the president, and the ghost of my dearly departed mother all appear and tell me that I'm not a man. I am 100% sure of what I am, and really always have been. And I don't take bullshit over it. I do not tell people I have "preferred pronouns." I just have pronouns, which are: he/him/his. If people refuse to use them I can't do anything about it, although my area has some pretty decent civil rights laws, so I can at least go complain. Which unfortunately I've had to do.

I don't know, friend, I am utterly exasperated by life right now. I'm leaning away from the idea of ctb, but we'll see. I have like 15 weird disabilities, and I'm not adapting well to a world where the American healthcare system has basically collapsed in many areas. There isn't a single hospital in my region that I'd dare set foot in as a patient right now. I'm trying to ride out a really severe bout of suicidality at home for that reason. It's not pleasant. And I just have no patience for bullshit anymore. So do not come at me with, "Ooh, male and female created he them." Guess what? Male and female is what created he me. Life's a bitch, innit? ^quote from the King James version of the Bible, if you're not familiar. It's 400 years old, so you get Yoda-speak like "created he them." It's a very famous passage, and it's thrown at trans people a lot. And it really is linguistically ambiguous as to whether it means: "God created men, and then he created women, and those are the two kinds of people he created," or: "God created only one kind of people, and they were all simultaneously male and female." I think it's pretty clear the idea is supposed to be that God made women and men separately, but it is a fun passage to turn around on someone annoying.

Anyway, if you can manage, I recommend giving no fucks whatsoever about what other people tell you about entirely personal matters like your gender, your sexual preference, or your genitalia. I think it's harder to let go of the need to people-please when you're younger and still figuring yourself out, which I think you are? It helps to be old and bitter. I'm going to be in my 50's soon and I am excited that I can achieve full curmudgeon status. Whee! (Ever see the movie "Grumpy Old Men?" Those guys were curmudgeons. Sorry if that's obvious--I never know what's obvious and what's not in an international group.)

You have to be prepared to loose everything and everyone.

Yeah. This too. It is a HUGE gamble, which fortunately played out well for me. But it doesn't for everyone. And it won't necessarily get rid of your depression. For me, it simultaneously made my life much, much better, and did not touch my depressive symptoms at all. That's because I have this weird thing called Pyrrole Disorder, though. It's essentially a problem where you physically cannot make the happy hormones that make life worthwhile. I actually take vitamins for it. They help. Do I still want to die? Mayyybe . . .?

I brought you a stupid meme:


Also, if penetrative sex is what you're after, what you probably want is something like this thing which IS ON A VERY NSFW PAGE. It's called a hollow strap-on. Some trans men use them too. A lot of strap-ons vibrate. Does a cis guy's dick vibrate? I don't think so. The store also carries vacuum pumps that are called "penis enlargers," although how well they work probably depends on your particular anatomy.

One final thought, although it's a Hail Mary idea: one version of transmasculine genital surgery is called a metoidioplasty. Basically, ligaments around the clitoris are cut, which allow it to stick out more. People don't usually get a ton of extra length from that, but they get some. I'm not sure if there's anything that translates well to your situation, but what the hell. And please stay off those horrible "pick up artist" sites where they call people "currycels" and say they have "micro-p's. It's just bitter guys who hate themselves and hate each other and ultimately hate women. You know what women like absolutely least? Hatefulness toward women. These are the guys who post stuff like, "All three of the women I've ever slept with said the experience was terrible, and that means that no women anywhere have ever liked sex." Ooookay bro. That's quite the theory. Also "currycel" is racist as fuck, and probably runs afoul of the site TOS on hate speech, actually. It's not like I'm going to go tattle on you or anything, but you might want to consider changing your username.

tl;dr: wait.what is a crabby old jerk. It suits him, he likes it, and it does keep some people from insulting him, at least to his face.

. . . exactly how comprehensible is my writing to a person whose first language is not English? I have a writing style that tends to assume a pretty strong command of English and familiarity with Western traditions and ideas. Not trying to be an asshole, that's how I was educated, that's how I write. I can certainly try to be more accommodating though if it would help.

 

[CTBgenuine]

As a transgender woman, this is the most bizarre thing I've ever heard! The penis is inverted to create a vagina shaft, so if you have a micropenis you'll have a vagina with no shaft and end up feeling like an inadequate woman... With the problems and financial difficulties that come with being trans. You'd literally be creating More problems for yourself!
Besides, to transition you undergo rigorous mental and physical tests and I doubt you'd pass them considering your motivation...

 

[MicropBaldCurrycel]

Stranger things have happened. ;) I am sorry that people have been so stupid and cruel to you. I hope that someday you can get those mean voices in your head to shut up. Nobody needs bullies living rent-free in their minds. At one time, my head was filled with mean stuff kids had said to me in grade school. I was in my early thirties, for pity's sake. How long can someone let a bunch of schoolchildren haunt them? There's a helpful technique used in cognitive behavior therapy (CBT, not to be confused with CTB, or the other CBT, which stands for "cock and ball torture." You really need to make sure you get the right CBT.)

Anyway--the idea is that every time you think something horrible about yourself, you stop and replace that thought with something more realistic. Like if you notice yourself thinking, "I'm the ugliest man alive!" You could try thinking, "You know what? Half the people on Earth are below-average in looks. Fifty percent of those homely people will be women. People tend to pair up with partners who are in the same general range with regard to looks. So who are these plain ladies going to be dating? Probably not Prince Charming, quite honestly, unless they (the women) are insanely rich. There are a lot of women out there who may not be beautiful, but who are kind, intelligent, and loving. If you are kind, intelligent and loving to them, I don't think it would be hard to find someone." I mean, okay, that's kind of a long example, but the idea is to try to get a mental image of yourself that is more an honest reflection of you, instead of a funhouse-mirror grotesque image.

Also, for the record, I am a man with a vagina. I am well aware that most people on earth loathe people like me and want us dead or in prison, or preferably both. That fact delayed my transition by 25 years, but I did eventually do it. And honestly, I don't give a damn whether the pope, the president, and the ghost of my dearly departed mother all appear and tell me that I'm not a man. I am 100% sure of what I am, and really always have been. And I don't take bullshit over it. I do not tell people I have "preferred pronouns." I just have pronouns, which are: he/him/his. If people refuse to use them I can't do anything about it, although my area has some pretty decent civil rights laws, so I can at least go complain. Which unfortunately I've had to do.

I don't know, friend, I am utterly exasperated by life right now. I'm leaning away from the idea of ctb, but we'll see. I have like 15 weird disabilities, and I'm not adapting well to a world where the American healthcare system has basically collapsed in many areas. There isn't a single hospital in my region that I'd dare set foot in as a patient right now. I'm trying to ride out a really severe bout of suicidality at home for that reason. It's not pleasant. And I just have no patience for bullshit anymore. So do not come at me with, "Ooh, male and female created he them." Guess what? Male and female is what created he me. Life's a bitch, innit? ^quote from the King James version of the Bible, if you're not familiar. It's 400 years old, so you get Yoda-speak like "created he them." It's a very famous passage, and it's thrown at trans people a lot. And it really is linguistically ambiguous as to whether it means: "God created men, and then he created women, and those are the two kinds of people he created," or: "God created only one kind of people, and they were all simultaneously male and female." I think it's pretty clear the idea is supposed to be that God made women and men separately, but it is a fun passage to turn around on someone annoying.

Anyway, if you can manage, I recommend giving no fucks whatsoever about what other people tell you about entirely personal matters like your gender, your sexual preference, or your genitalia. I think it's harder to let go of the need to people-please when you're younger and still figuring yourself out, which I think you are? It helps to be old and bitter. I'm going to be in my 50's soon and I am excited that I can achieve full curmudgeon status. Whee! (Ever see the movie "Grumpy Old Men?" Those guys were curmudgeons. Sorry if that's obvious--I never know what's obvious and what's not in an international group.)

Yeah. This too. It is a HUGE gamble, which fortunately played out well for me. But it doesn't for everyone. And it won't necessarily get rid of your depression. For me, it simultaneously made my life much, much better, and did not touch my depressive symptoms at all. That's because I have this weird thing called Pyrrole Disorder, though. It's essentially a problem where you physically cannot make the happy hormones that make life worthwhile. I actually take vitamins for it. They help. Do I still want to die? Mayyybe . . .?

I brought you a stupid meme:
View attachment 93310

Also, if penetrative sex is what you're after, what you probably want is something like this thing which IS ON A VERY NSFW PAGE. It's called a hollow strap-on. Some trans men use them too. A lot of strap-ons vibrate. Does a cis guy's dick vibrate? I don't think so. The store also carries vacuum pumps that are called "penis enlargers," although how well they work probably depends on your particular anatomy.

One final thought, although it's a Hail Mary idea: one version of transmasculine genital surgery is called a metoidioplasty. Basically, ligaments around the clitoris are cut, which allow it to stick out more. People don't usually get a ton of extra length from that, but they get some. I'm not sure if there's anything that translates well to your situation, but what the hell. And please stay off those horrible "pick up artist" sites where they call people "currycels" and say they have "micro-p's. It's just bitter guys who hate themselves and hate each other and ultimately hate women. You know what women like absolutely least? Hatefulness toward women. These are the guys who post stuff like, "All three of the women I've ever slept with said the experience was terrible, and that means that no women anywhere have ever liked sex." Ooookay bro. That's quite the theory. Also "currycel" is racist as fuck, and probably runs afoul of the site TOS on hate speech, actually. It's not like I'm going to go tattle on you or anything, but you might want to consider changing your username.

tl;dr: wait.what is a crabby old jerk. It suits him, he likes it, and it does keep some people from insulting him, at least to his face.

. . . exactly how comprehensible is my writing to a person whose first language is not English? I have a writing style that tends to assume a pretty strong command of English and familiarity with Western traditions and ideas. Not trying to be an asshole, that's how I was educated, that's how I write. I can certainly try to be more accommodating though if it would help.

wow thanks for this response, im very interested in getting to know you more and about you.

can i dm u? i dont normally dm anyone but i am eager to know about you.

As a transgender woman, this is the most bizarre thing I've ever heard! The penis is inverted to create a vagina shaft, so if you have a micropenis you'll have a vagina with no shaft and end up feeling like an inadequate woman... With the problems and financial difficulties that come with being trans. You'd literally be creating More problems for yourself!
Besides, to transition you undergo rigorous mental and physical tests and I doubt you'd pass them considering your motivation...

there are other new methods besides penile inversion theres grafting and perennial pull through and even one with a neo vagina without the depth though , it isnt ideal but its much less hassle and pain. Also Sigmoid Colon Vaginoplasty.

 

[TheLastFemaphrodyke]

Stranger things have happened. ;) I am sorry that people have been so stupid and cruel to you. I hope that someday you can get those mean voices in your head to shut up. Nobody needs bullies living rent-free in their minds. At one time, my head was filled with mean stuff kids had said to me in grade school. I was in my early thirties, for pity's sake. How long can someone let a bunch of schoolchildren haunt them? There's a helpful technique used in cognitive behavior therapy (CBT, not to be confused with CTB, or the other CBT, which stands for "cock and ball torture." You really need to make sure you get the right CBT.)

Anyway--the idea is that every time you think something horrible about yourself, you stop and replace that thought with something more realistic. Like if you notice yourself thinking, "I'm the ugliest man alive!" You could try thinking, "You know what? Half the people on Earth are below-average in looks. Fifty percent of those homely people will be women. People tend to pair up with partners who are in the same general range with regard to looks. So who are these plain ladies going to be dating? Probably not Prince Charming, quite honestly, unless they (the women) are insanely rich. There are a lot of women out there who may not be beautiful, but who are kind, intelligent, and loving. If you are kind, intelligent and loving to them, I don't think it would be hard to find someone." I mean, okay, that's kind of a long example, but the idea is to try to get a mental image of yourself that is more an honest reflection of you, instead of a funhouse-mirror grotesque image.

Also, for the record, I am a man with a vagina. I am well aware that most people on earth loathe people like me and want us dead or in prison, or preferably both. That fact delayed my transition by 25 years, but I did eventually do it. And honestly, I don't give a damn whether the pope, the president, and the ghost of my dearly departed mother all appear and tell me that I'm not a man. I am 100% sure of what I am, and really always have been. And I don't take bullshit over it. I do not tell people I have "preferred pronouns." I just have pronouns, which are: he/him/his. If people refuse to use them I can't do anything about it, although my area has some pretty decent civil rights laws, so I can at least go complain. Which unfortunately I've had to do.

I don't know, friend, I am utterly exasperated by life right now. I'm leaning away from the idea of ctb, but we'll see. I have like 15 weird disabilities, and I'm not adapting well to a world where the American healthcare system has basically collapsed in many areas. There isn't a single hospital in my region that I'd dare set foot in as a patient right now. I'm trying to ride out a really severe bout of suicidality at home for that reason. It's not pleasant. And I just have no patience for bullshit anymore. So do not come at me with, "Ooh, male and female created he them." Guess what? Male and female is what created he me. Life's a bitch, innit? ^quote from the King James version of the Bible, if you're not familiar. It's 400 years old, so you get Yoda-speak like "created he them." It's a very famous passage, and it's thrown at trans people a lot. And it really is linguistically ambiguous as to whether it means: "God created men, and then he created women, and those are the two kinds of people he created," or: "God created only one kind of people, and they were all simultaneously male and female." I think it's pretty clear the idea is supposed to be that God made women and men separately, but it is a fun passage to turn around on someone annoying.

Anyway, if you can manage, I recommend giving no fucks whatsoever about what other people tell you about entirely personal matters like your gender, your sexual preference, or your genitalia. I think it's harder to let go of the need to people-please when you're younger and still figuring yourself out, which I think you are? It helps to be old and bitter. I'm going to be in my 50's soon and I am excited that I can achieve full curmudgeon status. Whee! (Ever see the movie "Grumpy Old Men?" Those guys were curmudgeons. Sorry if that's obvious--I never know what's obvious and what's not in an international group.)

Yeah. This too. It is a HUGE gamble, which fortunately played out well for me. But it doesn't for everyone. And it won't necessarily get rid of your depression. For me, it simultaneously made my life much, much better, and did not touch my depressive symptoms at all. That's because I have this weird thing called Pyrrole Disorder, though. It's essentially a problem where you physically cannot make the happy hormones that make life worthwhile. I actually take vitamins for it. They help. Do I still want to die? Mayyybe . . .?

I brought you a stupid meme:
View attachment 93310

Also, if penetrative sex is what you're after, what you probably want is something like this thing which IS ON A VERY NSFW PAGE. It's called a hollow strap-on. Some trans men use them too. A lot of strap-ons vibrate. Does a cis guy's dick vibrate? I don't think so. The store also carries vacuum pumps that are called "penis enlargers," although how well they work probably depends on your particular anatomy.

One final thought, although it's a Hail Mary idea: one version of transmasculine genital surgery is called a metoidioplasty. Basically, ligaments around the clitoris are cut, which allow it to stick out more. People don't usually get a ton of extra length from that, but they get some. I'm not sure if there's anything that translates well to your situation, but what the hell. And please stay off those horrible "pick up artist" sites where they call people "currycels" and say they have "micro-p's. It's just bitter guys who hate themselves and hate each other and ultimately hate women. You know what women like absolutely least? Hatefulness toward women. These are the guys who post stuff like, "All three of the women I've ever slept with said the experience was terrible, and that means that no women anywhere have ever liked sex." Ooookay bro. That's quite the theory. Also "currycel" is racist as fuck, and probably runs afoul of the site TOS on hate speech, actually. It's not like I'm going to go tattle on you or anything, but you might want to consider changing your username.

tl;dr: wait.what is a crabby old jerk. It suits him, he likes it, and it does keep some people from insulting him, at least to his face.

. . . exactly how comprehensible is my writing to a person whose first language is not English? I have a writing style that tends to assume a pretty strong command of English and familiarity with Western traditions and ideas. Not trying to be an asshole, that's how I was educated, that's how I write. I can certainly try to be more accommodating though if it would help.

Thanx for all this great sharing! I have suspected I have pyrrole disorder for some time, but I do not think I have ever been diagnosed with it. I am aspergers with severe ptsd and major chronic depression. I also have terrible results trying to take supplements on my own. I am celiac and most every supplement contains wheat of some kind and every single time I have tried to supplement with B vitamins they make me very nauseous and dizzy, so I am at a loss. But I fit the profile.

 

[whatevs]

Why would you do this if you don't have gender dysphoria? Just because you have a tiny dick? Doesn't check out.

 

[MicropBaldCurrycel]

Why would you do this if you don't have gender dysphoria? Just because you have a tiny dick? Doesn't check out.

because right now no dick=no women

Boobs and vagina=some Lesbian and bi women.

 

[AndrewWood'sDeath]

I appreciate that. Unfortunately, I know with absolute certainty I would still feel suicidal and would want to CTB. Missing out on young womanhood, having to dilate for life and take hormones for life on top of the chance of not passing, painful surgeries and 5+ years in limbo. I would still resent and be jealous of attractive cis females. It really wouldn't make a difference for me, because admittedly I am a vein person who cares about looks and other's perceptions and I am not willing to change that. Different people have different reasons for wanting to be the opposite sex/gender and different goals in regards to transitioning, and mine are very vein.

Ouch trans man here and I totally feel this. I can't get legal access to any surgeries or hormones and I'm going to try but I'm pretty poor so getting T offline is unlikely, I rarely pass even though I dress masculinely, hair, binder etc. (I won't do masc makeup though because A) I live in my van and already have to do my daily routine in bathrooms B) Spending an hour doing makeup sounds about as girly as it gets). Like I hate sounding like such a defeatist but there is just not much chance for me to pass, a lifetime of taking an expensive hormones, never getting approval for top surgery (which I could never afford anyway) let alone any type of bottom, where as looking like a generic masc-dyke and wearing a binder 24/7 is something I've been doing practically my whole life costs no money and at least I look mostly "socially acceptable", what will it help my poor, inept, delusional self to also go through all that? Is it worth it? Can I even afford it?
lmao sorry for the rant this comment just struck a chord with me, I feel you.

 

[whatevs]

because right now no dick=no women

Boobs and vagina=some Lesbian and bi women.

But do you feel like a man, despite having a micropenis? At any rate, it's not true that no woman will want you, it's just harder to find one.

 

[wait.what]

can i dm u? i dont normally dm anyone but i am eager to know about you.

Sure. :) People don't really need to ask me first.

ingle time I have tried to supplement with B vitamins they make me very nauseous and dizzy,

This is what my doc said about it: the B vitamins really need to be only B6, not a bunch of B vitamins all together. B7 in particular (also called biotin, I think) is something you're not supposed to take massive amounts of if you're also taking a lot of B6. I can't immediately remember why.

Also, it may matter what the source of the B vitamins is. I have a pretty bad intolerance to brewers yeast (because of course I would), and the cheaper brands of B vitamins are all grown in brewer's yeast. You have to look for the "fancier" brands, which are synthetic. I get a kind called P5P from Pure Encapsulations. It's about $17 USD for 180 pills. I take 2-3 a day, so a bottle lasts a couple of months. The zinc I take is zinc orotate. It tends to cause less nausea than zinc picolinate, a fact which can be important if you're taking a LOT of zinc. The brand of zinc which I have is "NCI Advanced Research Dr. Hans Nieper Zinc Orotate." A bottle is about $14 USD for 100 pills. The issue with this type of zinc is that they are "60 mg pills" or "100 mg," or whatever, but only 10 mg of each pill is zinc. Since my doctor told me to take between 100-150 mg a day, that is a hell of a lot of zinc pills. Lots of other brands of zinc orotate are quite expensive, so keep in mind how many pills you'll have to take. If possible, you should really have a doctor looking in on you while you take that kind of thing . . . taking too much zinc in particular can damage your kidneys.

I can probably find the info on the lab that did the testing if you want. It's Walsh something, I think. It's in the U.S., if that's relevant. What you do is send them a couple of vials of pee frozen on dry ice. I think the cost was about $90.

 

[TheLastFemaphrodyke]

Sure. :) People don't really need to ask me first.

This is what my doc said about it: the B vitamins really need to be only B6, not a bunch of B vitamins all together. B7 in particular (also called biotin, I think) is something you're not supposed to take massive amounts of if you're also taking a lot of B6. I can't immediately remember why.

Also, it may matter what the source of the B vitamins is. I have a pretty bad intolerance to brewers yeast (because of course I would), and the cheaper brands of B vitamins are all grown in brewer's yeast. You have to look for the "fancier" brands, which are synthetic. I get a kind called P5P from Pure Encapsulations. It's about $17 USD for 180 pills. I take 2-3 a day, so a bottle lasts a couple of months. The zinc I take is zinc orotate. It tends to cause less nausea than zinc picolinate, a fact which can be important if you're taking a LOT of zinc. The brand of zinc which I have is "NCI Advanced Research Dr. Hans Nieper Zinc Orotate." A bottle is about $14 USD for 100 pills. The issue with this type of zinc is that they are "60 mg pills" or "100 mg," or whatever, but only 10 mg of each pill is zinc. Since my doctor told me to take between 100-150 mg a day, that is a hell of a lot of zinc pills. Lots of other brands of zinc orotate are quite expensive, so keep in mind how many pills you'll have to take. If possible, you should really have a doctor looking in on you while you take that kind of thing . . . taking too much zinc in particular can damage your kidneys.

I can probably find the info on the lab that did the testing if you want. It's Walsh something, I think. It's in the U.S., if that's relevant. What you do is send them a couple of vials of pee frozen on dry ice. I think the cost was about $90.

I have taken zinc before, when covid first started, but it was a copper zinc duo and I got VERY sick in a short time, after two weeks, within 20 minutes of taking the pill I was nauseous with a headache and unable to think and my tremors got very bad. I figure it was the copper. As for the B, even taking just the B6, the smell, I cannot hardly get it into my mouth without gagging and heaving, but I have never looked at the sourcing. My insurance finally kicked in on the first and I am not able to find a doctor that will see me. The very second they find out I am autistic, suddenly they no longer are taking new patients or they equate autism with a lack of intellect and tell me straight up, despite what their website says, that they do not treat hormone conditions, they only treat perimenopause, menopause, and endocrine disorders. Gee, I guess the thyroid is no longer part of the endocrine system and no longer secretes hormones, but hell, what do I know with a cellular biology background. I fucking hate people. Just because I do not like being touched or manhandled and I have great trouble with verbal communication does not mean that I am stupid. Why do I even TRY to feel better and want to live, why?