Venting No Rewards For Being Good

[Anonymoususer1234]

Just saw a post on another site saying something to the effect of "There are no rewards that come with being a good person."

Someone in the replies tried to argue that, no, actually, you do get rewards for being a good person. You get social connections and community which will give you more opportunities in life.

What bullshit. I don't think privileged people realize how detached they sound. You can buy social connections if you're rich and manipulate your way into them if you're charismatic, if you're physically attractive the social connections practically made themselves.

It has nothing to do with morality and everything to do with your social skills and influence.

The only reward you get for being a good person is a clear conscience, as far as I'm concerned.

 

[hmskms]

The only reward you get for being a good person is a clear conscience, as far as I'm concerned.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Maybe but I'd say good people tend to attract other good people as their close friends. (Of course- they also attract horrible people too who use/ abuse them.) I guess I'd argue that the connections they make with other good people are deeper though- because they are based on appreciation/ love if that doesn't sound too corny. Whereas I imagine, bad people consciously or subconsciously are all about what they can get out of people and how they can exert their power over them. Of course- having deep connections with people can bring its own problems- it can hurt when we lose those people. Still- I reckon the experience itself has to be nicer. Can bad people truly feel love? (The more selfless kind anyhow.)

 

[blujay21]

The reward is the self satisfaction gained from being a good person. When you do a genuinely kind act for no other reason than to be decent, it makes you feel good. The secondary, more downstream effects is it makes the world in turn a better place. If everyone was kind and considerate of other people, that would be the best possible world to live in. The benefits are abstract, but they are quite real.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

I don't think good people are good because there's a reward for it. I think it's because they're a good person and that's just how they are normally.

Is it really good if someone is doing something for a reward? A reward would spoil it a little because that turns something generous into something transactional. It would be like saving a puppy because there was a £1000 reward, what's worth more to that person? Isn't saving a puppy enough? Why does that need to be rewarded? So I don't think good people necessarily think about the potential benefits, they just are. I think most of us would go out of their way to save a puppy anyway. Or any trapped animal really.

The secondary, more downstream effects is it makes the world in turn a better place.

I think this is a good person's idea of an reward.

"Pass it forward" - is a thing where a stranger does something kind so that the next person does the same thing to another stranger.

 

[The anhedonic one]

In my own experience being a good person has led to me being taken advantage of and used and abused by others. I think this is because there are not that many genuinely good people in this world.
I think that the majority of people are social actors, meaning they are fake personalities who cannot show their true selves because they are repulsive inside.
I have a clear conscience for being a good person, but it doesn't make life happier and more bearable.

 

[Anonymoususer1234]

Maybe but I'd say good people tend to attract other good people as their close friends. (Of course- they also attract horrible people too who use/ abuse them.) I guess I'd argue that the connections they make with other good people are deeper though- because they are based on appreciation/ love if that doesn't sound too corny. Whereas I imagine, bad people consciously or subconsciously are all about what they can get out of people and how they can exert their power over them. Of course- having deep connections with people can bring its own problems- it can hurt when we lose those people. Still- I reckon the experience itself has to be nicer. Can bad people truly feel love? (The more selfless kind anyhow.)

I disagree. You can be as good of a person as possible. That doesn't gaurentee you will make connections. In order to get people to pay any attention to you you need to be socially skilled or otherwise privileged.

I don't think good people are good because there's a reward for it. I think it's because they're a good person and that's just how they are normally.

Is it really good if someone is doing something for a reward? A reward would spoil it a little because that turns something generous into something transactional. It would be like saving a puppy because there was a £1000 reward, what's worth more to that person? Isn't saving a puppy enough? Why does that need to be rewarded? So I don't think good people necessarily think about the potential benefits, they just are. I think most of us would go out of their way to save a puppy anyway. Or any trapped animal really.


I think this is a good person's idea of an reward.

"Pass it forward" - is a thing where a stranger does something kind so that the next person does the same thing to another stranger.

I agree. You shouldn't just be good because there's a reward attached. My issue is with people pretending that there is some kind of reward to being good. This post isn't me arguing that anyone should start being an asshole. I'm just saying, we should be honest about how good people are treated in society.

 

[jazzcat]

I think having a clear conscience is a pretty significant reward, but of course bad things still happen to good people no matter how good they are, life's not fair

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Well I think if nothing else, it's worth considering the ripple effect of your behavior, as someone else mentioned. If you go about your days as an asshole, you're objectively making the world around you worse.

You might say well I'm hurting, dickheads get all the money, bad boys get the girls, etc. But I think that's a bit of a dumb way to conduct your life. If you're hurting, try to absorb the blows and heal where possible. You're not doing yourself or anyone else any favors by acting out.

I do agree that there's no direct/tangible reward for being good, other than maybe putting a smile on someone's face. Humans are amibitious by nature, and we don't really get anywhere with niceties. In that respect I think it is indeed more about connections, wealth, and social standing. We want to move up, so we look for what's above us. And it's hard to argue that those in the highest echelons of society are actually great people.

Maybe it could be summarized as nice = cooperation, ruthlessness = advancement.