Venting nights are rough

[gardenfairy]

i don't really know what i'm gonna get out of posting this, i guess i just wanted people who understand to hear so i feel less alone.

nights are so hard. every night i cry myself to sleep for about three weeks now. it literally feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest. i try to keep myself busy, i try to talk to my friends but nothing dulls it. the days are awful but when the sun goes down and im alone in my room it's literally agonising. it feels like there's only one person in the world who could make me feel better but they can't now. my heart physically aches… i wish something could make it stop. the only thing that brings me any comfort any more is planning to ctb, and even that hardly scratches the surface. i wish i was young again. i wish someone could take me into their arms and take all of my pain away again. feeling like this is agony.

 

[painfully]

i have a similar feeling... mostly weekends, holidays and nights. i wish someone loved me and hugged me... it would alleviate a lot of the pain...

 

[blacksand]

At night my depression is always the worst it's like I'm crawling out of my skin. Just 5 years ago I used to be a happy night owl now I absolutely dread that time.