This is a positive post. I have really been struggling this semester, suicidal thoughts and all came back full force onto me earlier. I eventually confided in my therapist, but affirmed I had no immediate plans (both because I didn't, and I didn't want to get 5150'd). It was all true and mostly brought on by the external stress of classes and worries about careers in the future.
I talked about how I was considering switching majors as well, but she also, like some on here, believes my desire of switching majors simply stemmed from the struggles I was having in my Assembly and Comp Org class, which could be very correct. Ever since I've been doing better in that class, having my programs output what I wanted and everything, I have felt much better and not as much about changing my majors. I also realized that Nursing is very people-oriented, meaning I will have to sacrifice a lot for patients, and it will likely bring with it an emotional burden that I don't exactly know if I'm prepared for.
I also realized Computer Science is much broader than I initially convinced myself. I don't have to be a software engineer or anything, there's many fields that require a comp sci degree, or that require a related degree. Even IT, which is pretty different from cs in my opinion, can work. I'd probably be at the bottom of the totem pole initially, with little IT knowledge but I imagine the degree would help with upwards mobility.
Anyways, the light at the end of the tunnel thing is in regards to my transfer to university. I will have better professors and I also believe more accessible tutoring. She told me to keep looking forward to that, as my environment certainly isn't helping. For example, I asked a professor if there's any way she could help me with an issue I was having, and instead of helping or at least giving a helpful nudge, she tells me to "use my critical thinking and problem solving abilities," and went on a rant in our class call later about how, as computer science students, we should be able to problem solve the issues we were having (it wasn't just me), and it felt incredibly invalidating.
Anyways, I am trying to keep my eyes on that metaphorical light that is university, and maybe, just maybe, I can make it through this degree without CTB.
I talked about how I was considering switching majors as well, but she also, like some on here, believes my desire of switching majors simply stemmed from the struggles I was having in my Assembly and Comp Org class, which could be very correct. Ever since I've been doing better in that class, having my programs output what I wanted and everything, I have felt much better and not as much about changing my majors. I also realized that Nursing is very people-oriented, meaning I will have to sacrifice a lot for patients, and it will likely bring with it an emotional burden that I don't exactly know if I'm prepared for.
I also realized Computer Science is much broader than I initially convinced myself. I don't have to be a software engineer or anything, there's many fields that require a comp sci degree, or that require a related degree. Even IT, which is pretty different from cs in my opinion, can work. I'd probably be at the bottom of the totem pole initially, with little IT knowledge but I imagine the degree would help with upwards mobility.
Anyways, the light at the end of the tunnel thing is in regards to my transfer to university. I will have better professors and I also believe more accessible tutoring. She told me to keep looking forward to that, as my environment certainly isn't helping. For example, I asked a professor if there's any way she could help me with an issue I was having, and instead of helping or at least giving a helpful nudge, she tells me to "use my critical thinking and problem solving abilities," and went on a rant in our class call later about how, as computer science students, we should be able to problem solve the issues we were having (it wasn't just me), and it felt incredibly invalidating.
Anyways, I am trying to keep my eyes on that metaphorical light that is university, and maybe, just maybe, I can make it through this degree without CTB.
