Dying Opportunity
What looks so strong, so delicate
- May 9, 2025
- 77
For the longest time I felt like my parents wouldn't really mind if I just disappeared one day due to the insanity and chaos that is our family life…until today. On a whim i decided to walk home from a physical therapy center close to my home after forgetting that one of my parents said they would drive me back, and I was enjoying a rare freedom that I seldomly get.
It wasn't until I stopped by a cafe close to my house did I check my phone. Holy shit. I had an insane amount of phone calls from the both of them. The therapist even called after my parents went to get me and he had to tell them that I already left. Luckily they were able to find me through Life360 and take me home from there.
On one had they were very forgiving and understanding of why I did that, but on the other had I can't shake the guilt of scaring them and having to replan everything around my absence. All this time I thought that I was only valuable because of what I can provide due to my Parentificatied upbringing, and I guess I still do, but knowing they reacted like that is seriously fucking with me.
I'm torn between wanting to CTB and wanting to stay for both my family's sake and because I want to see where I can take my life. 2026 is going to be an interesting year…
It wasn't until I stopped by a cafe close to my house did I check my phone. Holy shit. I had an insane amount of phone calls from the both of them. The therapist even called after my parents went to get me and he had to tell them that I already left. Luckily they were able to find me through Life360 and take me home from there.
On one had they were very forgiving and understanding of why I did that, but on the other had I can't shake the guilt of scaring them and having to replan everything around my absence. All this time I thought that I was only valuable because of what I can provide due to my Parentificatied upbringing, and I guess I still do, but knowing they reacted like that is seriously fucking with me.
I'm torn between wanting to CTB and wanting to stay for both my family's sake and because I want to see where I can take my life. 2026 is going to be an interesting year…
