Venting My depression & BPD is killing me

[BriocheAlien]

I mean I have zero self respect for myself. I'm in a relationship with someone whos brain is equally fucked up. I just sit in silence (try my best to anyways) because I don't wanna anger him by talking. I work 40 hours a week and do college online and I hate having to wake up every single day and participate in society but I have no choice. I hate the ups and down of having a FP, I wish I had more self worth and happiness outside of what other people think of me.

I know I'm depressed but I don't even feel sad anymore, I just feel like letting go because life is so repetitive and pointless but I'm too scared to experience the unknown and nothing.

But feeling nothing and the unknown must be better than whatever I'm feeling right now on this earth.

 

[lack]

i, too, just feel numb. im sorry we're meeting like this but i hope we can both find peace from this suffering; somehow.

 

[BriocheAlien]

i, too, just feel numb. im sorry we're meeting like this but i hope we can both find peace from this suffering; somehow.

I wish the best for you, friend. It's awful and I wouldn't wish this feeling on anyone. I hope we get through this.