Music made by suicidal people.

[Pentobarbital_Plz]

This was a cover of the same song by The Smiths:
Asleep, by Xiu Xiu

Holy shit. That was a whole new level of :(
Thank you

One of the band members of LifeLover - Kim Carlsson - is.. I look up to him in a way. He self-harms a lot. But he doesn't cover his scars. On time he played while he was bleeding.

It's not really glorification of it.. I guess it's just that he's not afraid to show his pain. Sigh.

I don't understand why this is so frightening to me when I've taken a bath in my own blood before….I guess you can just really feel his raw hatred for his self, and Idk I get that :/ just wow.

Why do we fucking exist? ?

 

[Un-]

sooooo excited seeing lifelover here! My own band gonna cover their song on our debut concert this friday!

Would it be a breach of privacy to ask if you could post the cover on this thread? And, not that you asked, but damn I'm proud of you. A concert? Fuck. I'm playing guitar in my room.. I don't can't imagine doing it in front of an audience more than my mom. Wow.

.I guess you can just really feel his raw hatred for his self, and Idk I get that :/ just wow.

Sometimes it's not about that.. Sometimes it is, yeah but.. I've usually done it because life sucked so much.. It's like doing weed or drinking.. It takes your mind of things. With self harm, it.. Physical pain is much better to cope with than emotional pain.

Another thing that helps is the scars that are left behind.. They're sort of reminders of harder times. It helps me cope in a sense. They're disgusting to a lot of people.. I'm planning on getting a sleeve tattoo or something just to make my arms look decent.

Anyways.. I don't think Keaton is suicidal, but I'd bet everything I own that he's depressed:

 

[webawl]

If you like rap, a lot of Mac Miller's work deals with suicidal thoughts/depression. His album/mixtape Faces is probably my favorite in this regard.

Although his recent comments are abhorrent, Kanye West's album Ye is about his struggles with BPD and suicidal thoughts.

 

[Unending]

This will be a little long because I fucking love music lol but here are some things that come to mind:


Endless Dismal Moan is a somewhat more obscure one person black metal band that really touches me personally and inspires me to stick with my creative pursuits. The sole member of this project ctb years ago unfortunately. With that being said, the project is obviously laid to rest with him.



Funeral is a funeral doom band from Norway. I don't listen to this album nearly as much as I did for a while. Two members of this band ctb years ago as well. This album is my fav work of theirs and the cover art is beautiful. I generally lean towards black metal but funeral doom is pretty great too.



Dystopia is a really great crust punk/sludge band from oakland. Lyrical themes are consistently bleak in a very down to earth way across their whole discography. This band accompanied me through some very dark years. Some people complain that they sound cringe or whiny but I'll leave the lyrics to the opening track of this album here because this song brought me to tears the first time I heard it and you can rest assured that I had it on repeat for years. Also, if you are into this sound, the last track on this album, Sleep, is really good as well.

1. Stress Builds Character
(Intro)
Y'know sometimes, sometimes I feel so tired
I can't eat I can't sleep
So tired
The pressure builds and builds
Seems like there's no release
The things I see go unnoticed by some
fills my eyes with horror
Anger, and guilt, and frustration, and depression
Makes waking up every day harder and harder
I work my fingers to the bone just to survive
I gotta get money so I can have a home
So I can breathe, eat and live in this society
I don't even like money
And I gotta work every day just to feed myself
God it makes me sick
I just wanna curl up into a hole and die in this,
this isn't worth it!
I need a raise man!
I can't survive on this pay anymore!
I can't live on this!
I'm hungry, and I'm frustrated
And I can't eat, dammit!
God! I look for you to help, and I have see no help
And I see no thoughts, no looks, no praise!
You don't care, you don't love me!
I only love myself
No one will love me like I love me

[Verse 1]
Life's been swell now I want to die
My body, it hurts me, sigh after sigh
I call it torture, you call it life
A slave to money and everything I despise
Like everyone in general
Fuck, eat, sleep, destroy
Just about the only things you fucking enjoy
I am a disposable being who will fuck all life
I multiply and the air gets thinner and dirty
I take up space, I smell, I consume
But I produce nothing, I abuse
I have no reason to exist
The toilet's clogged in this world of shit

[Verse 2]
I breathe filth everyday
Living fucks up my brain
Why? Why did I wake up today?
My eyes are heavy
Why? Why must I see this face?
Your life is ugly
Why? Why must I buy these things?
I don't want them
Tension, tension
Frustration, alone
Tension, despair, tension
All these pressures on my life



Xasthur is great. This song sounds the way that distress and despair feel to me. Have had his music on repeat since the end of last year. There's also a documentary that he is featured in that I think any social outcasts, misanthropes, and severely depressed people/traumatized people could relate to in atleast some ways. Okay I think thats all I got so I'll conclude this post, thanks for reading:)

 

[LonelyEmerald]

Could it be, all of it?

 

[Ultracheese]

David Berman was one of my favorite lyricists. He had a very cynical style that was quite heavy on clever wordplay. But I think he's most powerful when he's being sincere. He released this album about a month before he hung himself. One of the most important songs of my life.

 

[affinity]

I couldn't tell you for sure, but I have a lot of his albums, and.. I wouldn't be surprised:
Epilogue, by Keaton Henson


One of my best, but long gone friends introduced me to Keaton. I used to hate him because of how sad he was. Now I have 7 of his albums on repeat, almost daily. I guess that shows how my mental health declined rapidly.

It's also the first song on my RYM list.

Thank you so much for introducing me to him. I went through a lot of his videos. Small Hands absolutely wrecked me to the point where I tried to think up a follow up video where all the little animals who were scared and alone were now okay.

Hip hop/R&B are my usual go-to's, but I'll also go back to 70s rock and of course some jazz and artists like Gil Scott Heron.

In any event…this song you shared really touched me and I've added it to my "list" (you know, that one). I just wish he was easier to understand. Maybe I'm just deaf

I was really interested to read that if you play a part back, it sounds like he is reciting the first line of a poem by Derek Mahon. It goes: "I am just going outside and may be some time". Long story short: it's about an older man (Captain Oates) on expedition in Antarctica with others and he knows he's endangering them due to his ill health, so he's about to leave camp and wander off and die on his own, saving the others. It's pretty beautiful actually.

 

[Un-]

Duster is one of those bands where.. I haven't heard anyone like them. At all.. And, they're just so damn sad. It's no wonder I have 11 hours of Duster.

One of my dreams was to go to space, and die up there, listening to Duster. It still is my dream.

Feel No Joy, by Duster:

Thank you so much for introducing me to him. I went through a lot of his videos. Small Hands absolutely wrecked me to the point where I tried to think up a follow up video where all the little animals who were scared and alone were now okay.

I have emotional attachments to Small Hands. I avoid it like the plague, because I know I, a grown man, will curl into a ball and cry. Again.

Derek Mahon. It goes: "I am just going outside and may be some time". Long story short: it's about an older man (Captain Oates) on expedition in Antarctica with others and he knows he's endangering them due to his ill health, so he's about to leave camp and wander off and die on his own, saving the others

The poem is based on a true story, if I recall correctly.

I know I can relate to that story.. I spent most of my life lifting people up, who'd never do the same for me. The most loving thing I can do for myself now is to die alone..

 

[deathissosad]

Not too sure if Craig Xen is suicidal but love this song. Its on my death playlist.

 

[Un-]

Oops. I posted it before. Uh..
Then my favourite rapper, LIL UGLY MANE. Used to be very suicidal.. Drug addict (heroine, meth) and so on.. I love his music. I just hate how unique it is.. You'll never find another rapper as... Raw.. As this:
Grace Within a Grace, by LIL UGLY MANE:

If you give a shit, he did a live show and he did a freestyle.. And it's one of my favourites of all time (7:50):


"I juggle diagnosis, catatonic magic potions, static hopeless
Manic out of focus, knocked around by nauseous oceans
Put the emphasis on endlessness, behold the prince of emptiness
Stand without a crown on
Just a mask of squirming rats that gnaw his skin and bloody fat
Drainage of his solitude that pools beneath his crooked feet
Nothing but the bones and meat, cold and barely moving
Below the ice of frozen streams, consumed by his atrocious greed
Stench of all his failures is his vile rotting potpourri
No one ever noticed me, none of you as low as me
Tremble up the stairs and then collapse until hypnosis leaves
Show you what I'm supposed to be, show you who you supposed to see
Writhing in possession, my delusion, my obsession
An idle hand that masturbate confusion with suggestions
Listens to your voice a million times and never hear it
I'm alone in my abandon and I'm slowly disappearin'"

 

[toomuchtimetodie]

Most mainstream music tends to be whining about emotional pain made by people who don't know real suffering.

 

[Red-Eyed-and-Blue]

Not sure if they were suicidal but Red House Painters definitely scratch that itch





Codeine is also pretty good

 

[Rocinante]

Every grunge band

 

[Lost Magic]

I don't know if the young artist of this song (and others) is suicidal but it is obvious she has struggled with deep depression. It's just a very haunting and sad song.

 

[Sister of the Moon]

An upbeat one.

 

[Un-]

I don't know if the young artist of this song (and others) is suicidal but it is obvious she has struggled with deep depression. It's just a very haunting and sad song.

I don't remember but I have a hunch that it was you who introduced me to this person.. I don't remember the thread, but you posted this song. I know have her album. Really, really depressing music.. My cup of tea. Thanks.

Ah fuck. I haven't listened to Mac Miller in a while, because it makes me a bit emotional.

Good News, by The Most Dope:

 

[wait.what]

Oh Kurt, and your awesome song mocking a deodorant commercial.


As far as I know, nobody from Suicidal Tendencies actually ctb, but I think they deserve an honorable mention.

Also, when you search YouTube for the band's name, you get this shit:


Thank God a video site is ready to "save" all those who type in an 80's punk band's name. Who could ever feel isolated and without purpose when there's an AI algorithm out there that cares so much?

 

[CowsAreCool]

I love joy division

The smiths and Morrisey are all death obsessed, but I'm not sure he was suicidal. Still, this is among the most beautiful songs I've heard in my life. I won't even listen to it, because I'm afraid I'll get sick of it.

 

[CowsAgainstCapitali]

A happy little song called I Wanna Die

 

[Rainy_days]