C

Cheffo

Member
Sep 23, 2023
44
I was injured and the quality of life is not worth it. So, I really want to leave and I am setting that up. But this was kind of sudden, I had never thought about suicide before. I mean, it was below the surface, but not something I had every seriously considered even through tough times.

But this is beyond what I can manage. All of the sudden I have to say goodbye to everyone, myself, the world. I am really an emotional dude, and I am middle aged, so it's funny. But I don't want to go out depressed. It sucks, I have friends, a house, good business, but I can't deal with the pain and disability.

I mean, if my body wasn't broke Id stay. Sure my brain is a little messed up (ADD, anxiety, ocd) but I could always find a way to go to the gym, take a walk, keep busy. But now it's too much. Probably the combination doesn't help, either way, I want out. My friends support me, even one of two family. I wish their was someone out there in a similar position I could communicate with.

Has anyone here been injured or have some sort of chronic health problem and intend to ctb? I was hoping not to be so alone in this while I await the right method. Thanks.
 
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Styg

Styg

Get to the next screen
Nov 11, 2023
14
Hey, I'm right there with you my friend. I'm younger than you, only in my early twenties, but I've had my life completely torn apart by a chronic condition that is only continuing to worsen as the days go by. The gym used to be my sanctuary, but I can't do that anymore; nor can I find any meaningful distraction from media and the like. I really don't want to die; more than anything I want to live my life. Yet, with each new day, my hope is dwindling, and it seems like there's only one way out. I hate these kinds of thoughts, but it's hard not for them to consume your everyday life in such a situation. I know our circumstances are different, but I just want to say that I understand where you're coming from. Don't feel ashamed for having these thoughts; it's a perfectly normal reaction to an impossible situation. We're only human, and there's only so much we can face before we start to crumble.

If nothing else, I hope you find some comfort in this community: no doubt there are others who feel the same way that you and I do. I wish you well in your life, and I hope your pain can be eased in some way.
 
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C

Cheffo

Member
Sep 23, 2023
44
Hey, I'm right there with you my friend. I'm younger than you, only in my early twenties, but I've had my life completely torn apart by a chronic condition that is only continuing to worsen as the days go by. The gym used to be my sanctuary, but I can't do that anymore; nor can I find any meaningful distraction from media and the like. I really don't want to die; more than anything I want to live my life. Yet, with each new day, my hope is dwindling, and it seems like there's only one way out. I hate these kinds of thoughts, but it's hard not for them to consume your everyday life in such a situation. I know our circumstances are different, but I just want to say that I understand where you're coming from. Don't feel ashamed for having these thoughts; it's a perfectly normal reaction to an impossible situation. We're only human, and there's only so much we can face before we start to crumble.

If nothing else, I hope you find some comfort in this community: no doubt there are others who feel the same way that you and I do. I wish you well in your life, and I hope your pain can be eased in some way.
Sorry for you as well my friend. I loved the gym too. And walking around the park. So we are probably not that different, except mostly in age probably. My "injury" was from taking an anti-biotic, and getting a bad reaction, but the reaction keeps going for years, so its kind of like a chronic illness. Sometimes I call it an injury (like a chemical injury from the drug) sometimes an illness or condition.

I don't really feel ashamed of the thoughts so much as sadness to go. I am basically trying to make it easier on the future me. My friends are sticking by me, and will be with me if I choose to go, which is comforting. Thanks for the reply. Feel free to DM me, same for anyone else.
 

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