MidnightCat
Still 3 more lives to go.
- Jan 1, 2023
- 215
It's funny I'm here writing this post. I feel like I am dead already, but I cannot rest.
Been struggling for years now. Went pretty downhill about 2 years ago.
Tried therapy, but unless I pay... I see the doctor twice a year. Tried meds... Nothing seems to work and I don't really trust them.
I already know I passed the point of no return a while ago.
But I cannot simply do it easily.
If I use SN will be considered suicide. And the insurance won't pay for the house, so I'll create a problem to my SO.
If I use my bike... It may be covered if they cannot assure it was a suicide. But it can go really wrong if I manage to survive.
For it to be done well... I should try and speak with my doctors for some time trying to fake I'm just good now.. and praise I can hit something hard enough so I won't become a vegetable the rest of my life.
I feel like I'm in chains. I'm really trying to think of 100% sure to work ways of ctb.. that doesn't seem like suicide to the insurance.
Been struggling for years now. Went pretty downhill about 2 years ago.
Tried therapy, but unless I pay... I see the doctor twice a year. Tried meds... Nothing seems to work and I don't really trust them.
I already know I passed the point of no return a while ago.
But I cannot simply do it easily.
If I use SN will be considered suicide. And the insurance won't pay for the house, so I'll create a problem to my SO.
If I use my bike... It may be covered if they cannot assure it was a suicide. But it can go really wrong if I manage to survive.
For it to be done well... I should try and speak with my doctors for some time trying to fake I'm just good now.. and praise I can hit something hard enough so I won't become a vegetable the rest of my life.
I feel like I'm in chains. I'm really trying to think of 100% sure to work ways of ctb.. that doesn't seem like suicide to the insurance.