Moments of 'happiness' feel fake and false?

[Arin]

Is this the case with anyone else? I experience moments of what you'd probably call 'happiness', when any normal person would laugh and smile and feel joy, and I do recognise and in a way 'feel' that in the moment, but it always just ends up feeling overshadowed with a sense of dread. It's essentially a very superficial feeling of enjoyment but under that very shallow surface it's just self-loathing and hopeless, since I know that in 5 minutes or hours or days, I'm going to be contemplating or even attempting suicide again, just like I always do, and no amount of false, momentary 'happy' moments will ever fix or solve that.

 

[BadVibes]

Happiness just feels like trying to tape up a little band-aid on the much bigger, practically unbandagable wound of life as a whole. It's not just "fleeting" - even if it was permanent, it wouldn't be enough. I actually had a girlfriend a while back and broke up with her because of this very same reason.

 

[divinemistress36]

I agree . Happy moments are so temporary and when they do happen it feels fake as its just a temporary increase in dopamine

 

[cyclicism]

Most definitely. There are times where, yeah, I'm laughing and feeling good, but in the back of my mind I can't shake the feeling that it's fake. Other times I do genuinely have a good time, but as soon as it ends I crash so hard that it completely overshadows any good I previously felt. It sucks.