Discussion Members who accompany others passing via video call/chat

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There were some users who were accompanied by others in their last moments, for example LetzteAusfahrt or all_pointless. Even though the documentation about their method may be very valuable, I personally could never do that for mental, ethical and legal reasons. However, I don't condemn it. Because if you don't want to die alone, you shouldn't, if you have the possibility.

Those who accompanied others - I'm curious and want to know how you can handle that mentally/ethically or did you even regret it?

Why exactly did you decide to "accompany" them - was it an empathic act? There was a member asking if anyone would like to watch his passing via live stream and the demand was high, so I was wondering if others are "just curious". Have you thought about legal risks (maybe depends on the country)?

 

[WornOutLife]

I saw LetzteAusfahrt die and felt a lot of sadness but it was interesting watching how well-organised he was with his method (SN) and the effects that ensued.
I wouldn't say it's "traumatic" but it's really "stunning" watching someone die.
Whenever I CTB, I'll tell all the info so that those who are interested, can watch me LIVE and know more about my specific method and so on.

 

[sadworld]

I watched LetzteAusfahrt ctb and I was on a voice call with him while it happened. Yeah it was really hard but I don't regret it, it was nice to be with him in his last moments and I just wanted the best for him.

 

[Life_and_Death]

i was talking to someone through chat when they did. this was several months ago and i had actually just met them that day. when i had first messaged them i didnt even know they were but we talked until they did. from what i can tell i was the last person they talked to......i dont regret it but it does still emotionally hurt me to this day.

and even though i know the emotional pain it would cause id do it again, they dont want to be alone and i understand that so i would be there for them if they asked me to be without a second thought.

 

[feast or famine]

I have a different experience with this. I was on a phone call with someone when they decided to ctb and I wasn't aware it was happening. I didn't ask to be a part of it, nor did I want to. And I feel it was unfair he put me in that position because I still deal with a lot of trauma from it.

I see why he did it with me on the phone and I don't hold anything against him. He meant a lot to me when he was here and he still does even though it's been 3 months since he's been gone.

Anyways, I can see why others want to do it. They want to offer support, comfort, and of course there is a natural curiosity as to what happens when someone dies and what that looks like.

For me personally and for my own moral reasons, I choose not to partake in live streams/voice chats with someone about to ctb. You really have to be in a strong mindset, and even if you are, you don't know how it will affect you until it happens.

As far as the legal stuff: I did receive a phone call from detectives the next morning as I was the last person to have spoken to him. I had a fake number generated by an app that I used to talk to him. They had also seen he was speaking to people on here and Discord since his computer was open before he could log out/erase stuff.

I was scared shitless as that was the first time in my life I've ever spoken to a detective. They basically called to inform me he had passed and that I was the last person he was in contact with. They didn't question me or anything like that.

My experience is probably more rare as far as getting a call from detectives is concerned. I wasn't mindful enough about the info I was giving out and I also didn't think this was going the direction it did. There's a lot of anonymity involved in these situations usually for the most part, so the legal aspect of it is generally okay.

 

[MiseryLovesMyCompany]

I watched Stubbe, there was audio connection in both ways as well. He was a friend, so I wanted to be with him in his final moments. Also, I volunteered to write a report about it when this question arose. I can't deny that it was hard, but it was like someone "had to" do it. I was interested in the method as that is my chosen one too, so it was a combination of reasons.

The fact that I was watching someone die didn't really register at first, especially because he was so calm and collected. It was certainly disturbing, but I watched it until his last movement. It takes a lot of time to process it, and that started with Xanax. I had to take something to calm me down when the reality of it started to sink in.

I have no regrets, it was a valuable experience and I could help my friend feel less lonely in his final moments. If a friend asked, then I would do it again. Now I can say that I more or less processed what has happened, but I still miss him.

What I observed during the ctb is that some people left and a lot of crying ensued at the end. It is not for everyone. I believe that an experience like this will stick to you forever.

Legal risks were not of concern to me. I don't really see a reason why anyone would pursue me for the act. I did not know his location nor his identity either, so not much can be said to me. Also, I'm sure that the police has better things to do.

I hope I could answer your questions.

 

[TooConscious]

I would've liked to have support when I exit by train but first off I know alot here don't agree with the method however there's plenty who do and it's a shame you can't trust anyone not to invite disrespectful parties who will turn it negative.

 

[Emily_Numb]

Personally I think watching someone CTB is grotesque. There are some truly fucked up people who get off on this sort of shit. I'm not saying the people above did in any way, but it's certainly not something that would be spiritually, emotionally and psychologically beneficial to 99.9% of humans to see.

 

[Ardesevent]

You all are really brave for being able to be there for someone through that. I can't imagine what it was like.

 

[Lone_Gray_Wolf]

I did that to a guy who got in contact with me through Discord. He was a guy in an Asian country and despite we got to chat for less than s month suddenly he gave himself a date and it was the next day. Minutes before his plan he asked me to accompany him (videocall) and he was mentioning to me how he was feeling.

Initially he felt good, nervous but all good. 10 minutes after he went to vomit, came back to chat (camera was against the bed so I couldn't see anything) but I heard him go and nothing more. Heard some breathing, little noises and an hour later the call got automatically ended. I remembered that he said: "If I am able to, I will go to where you live and thank you for this; even if it is as a ghost". That touched me...

I still feel bad for him and remember him most of the days. Certainly is fairly disturbing but I'm happy I helped him to feel less lonely on his last moments.

 

[virginiawoolf86]

I saw LetzteAusfahrt die and felt a lot of sadness but it was interesting watching how well-organised he was with his method (SN) and the effects that ensued.
I wouldn't say it's "traumatic" but it's really "stunning" watching someone die.
Whenever I CTB, I'll tell all the info so that those who are interested, can watch me LIVE and know more about my specific method and so on.

I missed the live stream of his passing. I wanted to be there, but in a way don't know if I'd be able to watch. I think "stunning" might be a good word for it.

I also think I'd do the same. But I think a part of me is selfish and doesn't want to go alone as much as I hate to admit that.

 

[Deleted member 23586]

I sob and cry at goodbye threads alone, so i'd probably burst if I were to watch someone go through with it. I honestly don't know what i'd do but for me it'd probably be traumatic. But at the same time, Idk if can just let people be alone if they want someone there in they're final moments. I commend those that had the choice to do it and said yes. Idk if i could do the same.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

I was online with @phezel on her last night. Just chat, no visuals. She asked me if I wanted to, and I wouldn't let her die alone. She used sn, was unresponsive in 20 minutes. Her dead is confirmed.

It was pretty emotional,( sometimes still is) but I'm happy I got to know her,and could be for her there in the end.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I certainly don't want to die alone, but I also don't want it to just be anybody. I want it to be someone who's very special to me - someone who would be supportive, comforting, and whose smile would bring me joy as I closed my eyes for the final time.

Sadly, no such person exists.

 

[sanction]

Its beautiful to have someone accompany you till the final moments. However, just to be safe, it may carry a small risk of the person's phone or computer later being found by the police after they're gone, with some records still there, and instead the person who accompanied may be traced and be held responsible for things like assisted suicide, etc. Although its just a guess, but may be one factor to consider. Sometimes the unexpected happens during the worst times

 

[franklynlb]

A girl ctb while on chat a few weeks ago, she asked someone to copy and paste what she was writting on chat to a thread she had created. At the time i didn't think much of the legal side of it, i didn't know her or her location. I offeed to do what she asked cause i felt i needed to, someone had to, ended up not being the only one who did it tho. At the time i felt i was there for the person and that was important, but it did affect me. Idk, i still think about her, she never came back online so i assume she succeded. I think it effed me up a bit but i couldn't say no to her, i didn't have the heart to leave the chat. I try to avoid this situations ever since.

 

[xrafinha]

I saw LetzteAusfahrt die and felt a lot of sadness but it was interesting watching how well-organised he was with his method (SN) and the effects that ensued.
I wouldn't say it's "traumatic" but it's really "stunning" watching someone die.
Whenever I CTB, I'll tell all the info so that those who are interested, can watch me LIVE and know more about my specific method and so on.

Is there a video of this? Could this be watched?

 

[WornOutLife]

Is there a video of this? Could this be watched?

Nope, no one recorded it (I assume). It was a streaming on Twitch which was deleted by the person controlling Dani's computer virtually.

 

[nightnightnitrite]

I haven't personally seen anybody CTB but I was reading the SS chat when they were passing because there were members giving updates as it went on. I personally would like somebody there with me when I pass and to write about it for information purposes. I just don't know who that would be...

 

[Bat 17]

Personally I think watching someone CTB is grotesque. There are some truly fucked up people who get off on this sort of shit. I'm not saying the people above did in any way, but it's certainly not something that would be spiritually, emotionally and psychologically beneficial to 99.9% of humans to see.

What a great post

 

[FuneralCry]

I never quite understand the appeal of watching other people actually ctb. In my opinion I think the whole goodbye thread/ last messages type thing serves the function of the person not feeling like they are alone as they go. I just think it would be traumatic to see someone else die.

 

[loopylou]

I wish I had someone there for me when I attempted a few weekends ago, I wasn't panicking but I definitely felt very lost.
i have seen both my parents die, and that never leaves you.

 

[Mr2005]

Video call/chat will be the reason for my passing

 

[Ob La Dee]

Personally I think watching someone CTB is grotesque. There are some truly fucked up people who get off on this sort of shit. I'm not saying the people above did in any way, but it's certainly not something that would be spiritually, emotionally and psychologically beneficial to 99.9% of humans to see.

You're absolutely right.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Was last year. A member here whom I had become good friends with decided to go. She was terrified of going alone, so, I offered to be on call with her while she did it. Have to say it was very hard to hear her go and it will haunt me for the rest of my life. I still miss her, but, I truly hope she found the peace she was looking for.