Hi.. Its me again. I already posted a discussion with what methods should I use and I don't think I was that specific.
This isn't my first time being suicidal nor planning to kill myself. At age 14, being a girl with autism, I studied the mind and body My hyperfocus was psychology though that would never reach my goal. I had planned everything very well, emails set at a certain time explaining everything. Though plans changed when my mum decided to come back half an hours earlier by them I had cut my brachial artery. Though medical resources are so advanced now, that I end up with mild nerve damage (cause me slow reflexes etc) and living another 4 miserable years on this planet.
I have heard people who have hanged themselves and ended being paralyzed or people who took an overdose and still survived.. I want to make sure I am gone. I have everything planned, the letters, the date, goodbye gifts if the people I love want to remember me etc. Though if it causes too much pain, I will understand if they throw my stuff away. Though there is still one thing remaining, the method I use. From past attempts to stories I hear, how do I make sure the medical system of my country does bring me back against my will. I think society should let me choose between life and death like how people can choose to vote. I am at a certain age now and though now I am not a child anymore, people will still consider me 'too young'. So when in their eyes will it be considered alright? I don't think it ever will, society's expectations I have dealt with my whole life.
The community seems to be very understanding on here and I am sure that people will know much more them me. Though looking for methods if much harder than it seems with websites using an excuse to hack or going on your search history. So as a favour and I am grateful to whoever makes time for this, in the comments can someone right methods and how successful they are. It would mean a lot.
Sorry for the long paragraphs and thank you for reading this.
This isn't my first time being suicidal nor planning to kill myself. At age 14, being a girl with autism, I studied the mind and body My hyperfocus was psychology though that would never reach my goal. I had planned everything very well, emails set at a certain time explaining everything. Though plans changed when my mum decided to come back half an hours earlier by them I had cut my brachial artery. Though medical resources are so advanced now, that I end up with mild nerve damage (cause me slow reflexes etc) and living another 4 miserable years on this planet.
I have heard people who have hanged themselves and ended being paralyzed or people who took an overdose and still survived.. I want to make sure I am gone. I have everything planned, the letters, the date, goodbye gifts if the people I love want to remember me etc. Though if it causes too much pain, I will understand if they throw my stuff away. Though there is still one thing remaining, the method I use. From past attempts to stories I hear, how do I make sure the medical system of my country does bring me back against my will. I think society should let me choose between life and death like how people can choose to vote. I am at a certain age now and though now I am not a child anymore, people will still consider me 'too young'. So when in their eyes will it be considered alright? I don't think it ever will, society's expectations I have dealt with my whole life.
The community seems to be very understanding on here and I am sure that people will know much more them me. Though looking for methods if much harder than it seems with websites using an excuse to hack or going on your search history. So as a favour and I am grateful to whoever makes time for this, in the comments can someone right methods and how successful they are. It would mean a lot.
Sorry for the long paragraphs and thank you for reading this.
