Lost my suicide spot( jump)

[Defenestration]

Hello, I lost my suicide spot. I found a 60-meter-high terrace where I could land at the very bottom, either on grass or hard ground... in short, it was great.

I could have used it between the beginning of 2023 and the end of 2024, but I didn't have the courage. But the problem is, I think the tower guard must have discovered I was suicidal and no longer answers me when I ask him if I can go up to the terrace for photos, as happened once before... before, he would say, "Fine."

In short, I'm disgusted. I don't want to travel 500 km to find a bridge. The travels make me very anxious, I have no sense of direction (I don't know), and I'm worried about repatriating the body for my family.

In short, this method, although it requires some strength, lasts 4.5 seconds, whereas my sn, even if it doesn't hurt, is extremely anxiety-inducing...

I feel like I'm dying.

 

[homeboundcripple]

Hello, I lost my suicide spot. I found a 60-meter-high terrace where I could land at the very bottom, either on grass or hard ground... in short, it was great.

I could have used it between the beginning of 2023 and the end of 2024, but I didn't have the courage. But the problem is, I think the tower guard must have discovered I was suicidal and no longer answers me when I ask him if I can go up to the terrace for photos, as happened once before... before, he would say, "Fine."

In short, I'm disgusted. I don't want to travel 500 km to find a bridge. The travels make me very anxious, I have no sense of direction (I don't know), and I'm worried about repatriating the body for my family.

In short, this method, although it requires some strength, lasts 4.5 seconds, whereas my sn, even if it doesn't hurt, is extremely anxiety-inducing...

I feel like I'm dying.

abandon it if it's too much stress, look into something like charcoal/tent

 

[Defenestration]

abandonnez-le si c'est trop stressant, envisagez quelque chose comme du charbon de bois/une tente

Now i need

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

Your situation is that you have SN but your SI is too strong to overcome? Do you possibly have access to any anxiety meds?

 

[Defenestration]

Vous souffrez de troubles neurosensoriels, mais votre anxiété systémique est trop forte pour être surmontée. Avez-vous accès à des anxiolytiques ?

Yes all days but nothing utility

 

[ElTopo]

Hello, I lost my suicide spot. I found a 60-meter-high terrace where I could land at the very bottom, either on grass or hard ground... in short, it was great.

I could have used it between the beginning of 2023 and the end of 2024, but I didn't have the courage. But the problem is, I think the tower guard must have discovered I was suicidal and no longer answers me when I ask him if I can go up to the terrace for photos, as happened once before... before, he would say, "Fine."

In short, I'm disgusted. I don't want to travel 500 km to find a bridge. The travels make me very anxious, I have no sense of direction (I don't know), and I'm worried about repatriating the body for my family.

In short, this method, although it requires some strength, lasts 4.5 seconds, whereas my sn, even if it doesn't hurt, is extremely anxiety-inducing...

I feel like I'm dying.

I too am looking for this method, I still need to find a suitable place though, even if traveling through Europe isn't too much a problem finding a decent, accessible spot is still very hard.
I lost many spots to people ctbing and the fact that they put anti-suicide barriers after.