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ScholarOfDespair

ScholarOfDespair

Member
Sep 27, 2025
47
Every single day, I find myself on the brink of losing my sanity. It's like I'm constantly walking on a tightrope, and one wrong move could send me spiralling into an abyss of madness. The anxiety that consumes me every morning is almost unbearable. It's not just the usual worries; it's a deep, gnawing fear that permeates every fiber of my being. I wake up with a pounding heart and a mind already racing, unable to find a moment of peace.

As if that weren't enough, I'm starting to believe in some seriously bizarre concepts. Reality shifting and manifestation? I never thought I'd fall for that kind of thing, but here I am, clutching at straws, desperate for any semblance of control over my chaotic life. It's like my mind is playing cruel tricks on me, making me question what's real and what's not. I find myself spending hours down internet rabbit holes, trying to make sense of it all, but it only leaves me more confused and disoriented.

Despite all this internal turmoil, I'm too much of a coward to take the ultimate step. I'm stuck in this endless cycle of misery, too afraid to end it all, yet too broken to keep going. It's a constant tug-of-war between the desire for peace and the fear of the unknown. I'm paralyzed by indecision, trapped in a cage of my own making, with no clear path to escape.

Sometimes, I wonder if this is what rock bottom feels like. But even if it is, I'm not sure I have the strength to climb back up. Every day is a struggle, and every night is a battle. I'm drowning in a sea of anxiety and despair, and I don't know how much longer I can keep my head above water.
 
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K

kitkat9234

Arcanist
Nov 27, 2024
425
I'm trapped as well. Too chicken shit to try agsin yet have no will to live. Barely functioning. It's awful being stuck like this.
Hugs to you 💜
 
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ScholarOfDespair

ScholarOfDespair

Member
Sep 27, 2025
47
I'm trapped as well. Too chicken shit to try agsin yet have no will to live. Barely functioning. It's awful being stuck like this.
Hugs to you 💜
Thank you and hugs to you as well. I hope you find peace :)
 
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LighthouseHermit

LighthouseHermit

Free
Sep 20, 2025
184
Reading your post brought tears to my eyes. You suffer a lot, and I'm so sorry for that.

I hope this hug brings you a tiny bit of joy.

iu


I wish you relief from this suffering.
 
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H

Hollowman

Empty
Dec 14, 2021
2,087
Being in limbo sucks
 
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ScholarOfDespair

ScholarOfDespair

Member
Sep 27, 2025
47
Being in limbo sucks
For me, it's no longer limbo, it's hell on earth.
Reading your post brought tears to my eyes. You suffer a lot, and I'm so sorry for that.

I hope this hug brings you a tiny bit of joy.

iu


I wish you relief from this suffering.
Thank you very much! I wish you peace as well :)
 
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S

Sadbanana

God doesn't care
Aug 20, 2024
144
I've just made a very similar post. It's very hard place to be. I hope you get your peace.
 
S

setspiritfree

Student
Oct 19, 2025
136
Every single day, I find myself on the brink of losing my sanity. It's like I'm constantly walking on a tightrope, and one wrong move could send me spiralling into an abyss of madness. The anxiety that consumes me every morning is almost unbearable. It's not just the usual worries; it's a deep, gnawing fear that permeates every fiber of my being. I wake up with a pounding heart and a mind already racing, unable to find a moment of peace.

As if that weren't enough, I'm starting to believe in some seriously bizarre concepts. Reality shifting and manifestation? I never thought I'd fall for that kind of thing, but here I am, clutching at straws, desperate for any semblance of control over my chaotic life. It's like my mind is playing cruel tricks on me, making me question what's real and what's not. I find myself spending hours down internet rabbit holes, trying to make sense of it all, but it only leaves me more confused and disoriented.

Despite all this internal turmoil, I'm too much of a coward to take the ultimate step. I'm stuck in this endless cycle of misery, too afraid to end it all, yet too broken to keep going. It's a constant tug-of-war between the desire for peace and the fear of the unknown. I'm paralyzed by indecision, trapped in a cage of my own making, with no clear path to escape.

Sometimes, I wonder if this is what rock bottom feels like. But even if it is, I'm not sure I have the strength to climb back up. Every day is a struggle, and every night is a battle. I'm drowning in a sea of anxiety and despair, and I don't know how much longer I can keep my head above water.
Paralyzed by fear,
Scared of inaction,
In the middle….peaceful abyss.
 
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Pale_Rider

Pale_Rider

Enlightened
Apr 21, 2025
1,141
The thing about that is for me at least you feel there will be a finality to your insanity. That you are going to go over an invisible line, and perhaps the pain, o r scaryness of it will be over. Nope just more insanity , and pain. That's my opinion anyways.
 

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