Long time no see!

[quietwater]

There's something utterly strange in coming back here and posting again after some time, because I know it means I relapsed.
I hate it (because, of course, it means I am not feeling well) but at the same time it's kind of comforting... because I've always felt seen here.

In the last month I thought I was doing better, and I was for some time, but now everything is going down again. A lot has changed though, mostly how I view things, and even if it was only for a month and something... I actually felt better.
Now I don't.
And I know I wasn't off for an ACTUAL long time, but still... have you ever felt this way in coming back here? Or this way about relapsing, loving it and hating it?

Tell me about your day, if you wish– or keep me company, I enjoy listening and talking with everyone! :) ★

 

[LunarCharm]

I understand the feeling, friend!
I was offline here for a while too up until recently, it wasn't that long really but it definitely felt like it haha

 

[quietwater]

I understand the feeling, friend!
I was offline here for a while too up until recently, it wasn't that long really but it definitely felt like it haha

I know, when I came back online here and saw that my last post was on January 17 I was shocked because I thought I went offline here for much much longer.
I understand how you feel, I hope you can feel better <3

 

[Anonymous_A]

I was going to make a post like this not too long ago. Things don't really change. You just distract yourself or become distracted.

We can distract ourself but sooner or later you can find yourself asking yourself what's the point?

I was in a bad place when I first made an account on here, was so set on ctb..got SN and couldn't even do it.

Picked myself up, made financial gains..somewhat life gains and truly I'm not happy. Focusing on the things I can control, hasn't helped since it's stuff I can't control which have mentally built up and caused a domino effect landing myself where I am now.

I'm probably just putting myself off till my breaking point. (When my dad dies, that is. He's old…84, me 27) which too was the main thing holding me back.

But yeah, anyways. Coming back here is weird. Can't stay and wander about too much because nothing has changed even to when I first started lurking about.

People, myself included, read too much and get hit with the paralysis by analysis. Reading too much, asking too much..resulting in not ctb. There's no real change in posts, comments or new breakthrough ideas.

It's funny how I write this. As my ctb idea is simply waiting and holding off till my dad dies. Till then I'll be carrying on as normal, saving my money…not putting myself in situations which will hold me back. No deep relationships, nothing to where I'd end up having kids etc.

In the end, one way trip to America splashing out my funds to land myself laying in a national park along with copious amounts of fent hehe.

 

[restless.dreams]

Tell me about your day, if you wish– or keep me company, I enjoy listening and talking with everyone! :) ★

I haven't had the energy to get out of bed yet today, but my sweet cat is here keeping me company. @quietwater What's your favorite animal?

 

[quietwater]

I was going to make a post like this not too long ago. Things don't really change. You just distract yourself or become distracted.

We can distract ourself but sooner or later you can find yourself asking yourself what's the point?

I was in a bad place when I first made an account on here, was so set on ctb..got SN and couldn't even do it.

Picked myself up, made financial gains..somewhat life gains and truly I'm not happy. Focusing on the things I can control, hasn't helped since it's stuff I can't control which have mentally built up and caused a domino effect landing myself where I am now.

I'm probably just putting myself off till my breaking point. (When my dad dies, that is. He's old…84, me 27) which too was the main thing holding me back.

But yeah, anyways. Coming back here is weird. Can't stay and wander about too much because nothing has changed even to when I first started lurking about.

People, myself included, read too much and get hit with the paralysis by analysis. Reading too much, asking too much..resulting in not ctb. There's no real change in posts, comments or new breakthrough ideas.

It's funny how I write this. As my ctb idea is simply waiting and holding off till my dad dies. Till then I'll be carrying on as normal, saving my money…not putting myself in situations which will hold me back. No deep relationships, nothing to where I'd end up having kids etc.

In the end, one way trip to America splashing out my funds to land myself laying in a national park along with copious amounts of fent hehe.

I wish you the best, dear. I hope you can feel better in one way or another, and I understand the feeling of coming back like nothing has really changed.
Sending love from here <3

I haven't had the energy to get out of bed yet today, but my sweet cat is here keeping me company. @quietwater What's your favorite animal?

A cat? I love cats ^^
What's its name?
Also, my favourite animal is probably the elephant :) Wbu?

 

[restless.dreams]

A cat? I love cats ^^
What's its name?
Also, my favourite animal is probably the elephant :) Wbu?

His name is Socks! Hmm my favorite animal would probably be a frog :)

 

[barelybetter]

I haven't been on here in ages, so long I lost access to my old account and had to make this one lol. Feels a little weird but honestly ss is a place of comfort for me now.

 

[broth0100]

Yea ive mixed feelings abt relapsing too, im sad and scared but i feel comforted by the community at the same time. Nothing tht interesting abt my day today, i just cried for most of it lol. Hope ur day today was ok :)

 

[Bunnybrains]

welcome back :)