list of things im grateful for before ctb

[notevenhere]

• saw twenty one pilots live, specifically holding onto you
• was skinny from ages 0-27 years old
• saw seventeen and heard don't wanna cry live, (i cried) went to an anime convention beforehand
• izzy, maeve & kei.
• got a guitar at 15, was surrounded by izzy's friend group: they were all made of stardust.
• i experienced loyalty at least two times
• diazepam shot in my arm
• clubbing with maeve
• being skinny for yhat clubbing incident
• saw the 1975 two times, and one time i stayed up at the venues stairs until 2am with a girl.
• i had really pretty partners?
• on god, i have at least two songs about me that's fully produced.
• i got serenaded the day after my attempt.
• benzo ans booze addiction. god i miss being skinny.
• i was a virgo sun writer once. was easy to make people fall in love with me.
• i was someone's muse.
• i knew what being loved felt like.
• lost my virginity despite my condition.
• hikineet lifestyle— was able stream and drink and repeat.
• had 3 friend groups at 16-21
• had simps streaming during the pandemic and met cool people i never had during lockdown.