• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block.

Siamese Believe

Siamese Believe

Member
Dec 8, 2025
13
I genuinely feel like I'm up against AM from the popular book "I have no mouth and I must scream". No matter how many times the 5 captive humans tried to off themselves to escape never ending agony, AM would not let them go. Keeping them alive to torture them for over 100 years.

One day, one of the captives snaps and kills all the other captives with an ice stalagmite to set them free from the torture, but he is unable to do himself in before AM catches him. He is then turned into an immortal human slug with no ears, mouth, nose, or limbs. And his sense of time altered so that brief periods of time like seconds, minutes, hours, etc, feels like hundreds of years are passing. Unable to do anything but suffer.

This is what it feels it feels like to me, like the second I try to attempt to free myself. I will end up permanently disabled, a fate worse than death. And then be completely unable to finish the job.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Forever Sleep, pthnrdnojvsc, ishiguro and 3 others
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
46,130
I understand, I just always suffer so much from how the option of peaceful, guaranteed death is denied for me so finally I can be at peace from this torturous, futile existence that only ever causes so much suffering, I see so much cruelty in how we exist in this horrific anti-suicide world where the suffering and torture of existing is seen as to force and prolong no matter what, it's just so horrific to me how trying to cease existing can go wrong in this existence where there is no limit as to how much one can be tortured.
 
pthnrdnojvsc

pthnrdnojvsc

Extreme Pain is much worse than people know
Aug 12, 2019
4,063
I genuinely feel like I'm up against AM from the popular book "I have no mouth and I must scream". No matter how many times the 5 captive humans tried to off themselves to escape never ending agony, AM would not let them go. Keeping them alive to torture them for over 100 years.

One day, one of the captives snaps and kills all the other captives with an ice stalagmite to set them free from the torture, but he is unable to do himself in before AM catches him. He is then turned into an immortal human slug with no ears, mouth, nose, or limbs. And his sense of time altered so that brief periods of time like seconds, minutes, hours, etc, feels like hundreds of years are passing. Unable to do anything but suffer.

This is what it feels it feels like to me, like the second I try to attempt to free myself. I will end up permanently disabled, a fate worse than death. And then be completely unable to finish the job.
Same . I agree. I'm going through that book only worse.

They did make us like that slug taking away all the guaranteed suicide methods like Nembutal, hiring someone to shoot me in the head , sarco suicide pod / booth etc

And imo in a way this world is worse than that book because AM didn't create them to be born while imo we were brought here to be slaves on purpose
 
Last edited:
Claymore7274

Claymore7274

I don't want to die, i just want to stop living
Oct 4, 2025
75
Yeah, i get what you feel. It blows my fucking mind there's not a single place in this damned world where you're allowed to peacefully die unless you already got a unbearably painful illness or even terminal.
 

Similar threads

systemic_livestock
Replies
36
Views
1K
Suicide Discussion
_Vasa&Me_
_Vasa&Me_
Life Is My Coffin
Replies
1
Views
100
Recovery
nocatwaslost
nocatwaslost
spookyjar
Replies
1
Views
292
Suicide Discussion
justanotherfailure
justanotherfailure
W
Replies
3
Views
176
Suicide Discussion
wordsoutb4sumnelsin
W