Leaving the forum

[Pain In The Ass]

My hypothesis is that the mods are the most depressed, despondent or actively suicidal in here, that's why they aren't that active, especially lately.

But when they were they had some political bias at times (the one you'd like, I believe), so the change wasn't that bad for people like me. I just needed to accept that some people will insult me and nothing will be done about it, but it goes both ways, hehe.

I think it's better when the forum is like real life, rather than some sort of nanny-state, with people telling tales on each other to the babysitters - maybe it would be better to have an extra section where people can go to talk about their mental health problems that is more thoroughly moderated, and there could be a warning that in this suicide talk section not everyone is mentally ill (a faulty stereotype about suicidal people in general) or necessarily sympathetic to people going through a mental health crisis, or people who generally believe that the earth would be a better place without humans on it, so be warned before posting, that people may not understand what you're going through, and could be insensitive to it somewhat - they may just start typing whatever comes to mind, and it may be 'advice' or opinions you didn't ask for

 

[Pluto]

they may just start typing whatever comes to mind, and it may be 'advice' or opinions you didn't ask for

Change tends to be quite rare on the forum, so for the most part it is a question of accepting everything as it is.

I've made black humour in the past about the lack of a political movement for suicide/euthanasia being due to the activists failing to live until the next election. Similarly, it will also make it hard for this website to respond to legitimate criticisms or to guide the culture of the website forward based on an inspired vision because of the nature of the subject matter and those afflicted by it.

While I feel that it would be appropriate for the forum to add additional resources (including more sub-forums, and perhaps more moderators) in proportion to the substantially increased membership, it may ultimately be a tragedy of circumstance if this does not occur.

 

[YourNeighbor]

I think it's better when the forum is like real life, rather than some sort of nanny-state, with people telling tales on each other to the babysitters

Who are you kidding? In real life there are consequences to being a dick. Spout mysognist or racist bullshit and most real life social groups will have little to do with you. That's why such groups rely so desperately on the anonymity of the internet to organize/interact.

 

[Niko66]

People who think the moderation team is both too inactive and lenient and at the same time actively persecutes and censors them and them only maybe you are just being a dick.

 

[YourNeighbor]

My hypothesis is that the mods are the most depressed, despondent or actively suicidal in here, that's why they aren't that active, especially lately.

I don't necessarily blame the mods too much, they seem to be perpetuating a forum culture consistent with the founding. My druthers would see this place be more adult, but that's irrelevant.

But when they were they had some political bias at times (the one you'd like, I believe), so the change wasn't that bad for people like me.

I have no idea what this means, but fwiw I don't come here to be educated on politics (except possibly MAiD policy) and couldn't care much less about the politics of the mods, as long as there is no overt fascism or communism. There are no policy/economics/political science experts on this forum among mods or members as far as I can tell, so the less politics the better.

 

[Imissyoumydarling]

This is very well said. I agree with you.

I'll be making a different choice, but I completely agree with you. This place doesn't seem as pro-choice as it says.

 

[NSA]

Sorry, this came out harsher than intended. Someone called me an ingrate. I think there's some truth to that. This place helped me a lot, so it doesn't make sense for me to excoriate it once I'm leaving. I apologize.

Had a feeling you might feel this way later. You've helped lots of people here too, I think. You've helped me, just by existing and sharing your perspective/story (and responding to my stupid comments lol)

Maybe you can come back one day and share a 'success' story. Otherwise good luck, and may you never need this place again.

 

[Pain In The Ass]

Spout mysognist or racist bullshit

Are you implying I've done that on here?

Who are you kidding? In real life there are consequences to being a dick. Spout mysognist or racist bullshit and most real life social groups will have little to do with you. That's why such groups rely so desperately on the anonymity of the internet to organize/interact.

misogynistic jokes are commonplace amongst most men friends, and jokes about different racial stereotypes are common too - as long as they're clearly jokes

 

[YourNeighbor]

misogynistic jokes are commonplace amongst most men friends, and jokes about different racial stereotypes are common too - as long as they're clearly jokes

Setting aside your assumptions about how common certain kinds statements are (you'd be surprised how wrong you are after high school):

make any joke or worse in the privacy of a discussion with a friend in real life (or a dm here) and no one will object.

Do so publicly in real life (or here publicly, though as was noted this place tolerates far more toxicity than most any real life gathering) and there may be consequences. See how that works?

 

[Pain In The Ass]

Setting aside your assumptions about how common certain kinds statements are (you'd be surprised how wrong you are after high school):

make any joke or worse in the privacy of a discussion with a friend in real life (or a dm here) and no one will object.

Do so publicly in real life (or here publicly, though as was noted this place tolerates far more toxicity than most any real life gathering) and there may be consequences. See how that works?

i don't know exactly what we're talking about any more but, I've noticed, even publicly, a lot of people in a group will laugh at something controversial, but then realise there are others around and quickly check to see if others are laughing or not, to see if they're in a chilled out group, or if there are some thin-skinned 'moral posturers' around them

 

[Painless_end]

I am trying to take responsibility for my life. It's the hardest thing I've ever done, because it means I don't have anyone or anything to blame for everything that's gone wrong in my 30 years among people.

It's not depression. It's not childhood--it's definitely not parents. The awesome responsibility, power, tragedy, euphoria of being, that rests with me. The time for childish blaming and games and running into the arms of saviors is over. I have wrought my own fortune. Everything I have chosen is everything I have become.

I would like to become someone else. I am thankful for the love, joy, loss and attention I have shared with everyone else whose life is unfortunate enough to find themselves in a place like this. But I cannot get better here. Sanctioned Suicide is a waiting room, a kind of purgatory for me. A place to try to make alive the notion that maybe the responsibility rests not with me but with someone, something, somethings else. Or perhaps a place where I could explore the idea, play in the space, of a world in which the awesome burden of living is something that can be discarded, sent back to the Creator with a simple "no thanks." I have explored this territory and found it completely barren. It is a lifeless place, ultimately, because that is what it was crafted to be.

"Choice" is what is touted here. Here is a common response on the forum: "I respect your decision, no matter what it may be, and I hope you find peace." I hope none of you find "peace." I hope you all reckon with the dragons in your life and best them. I hope you get fucking scorched. I hope you cry helplessly on the floor, collect yourself, and choose to remain among people. I hope you soar far from and above this place when you are ready. A website called, "Sanctioned Suicide:" How could I have ever thought this was a place of possibility?

Goodbye to those who have helped me, guided me, calmed my frantic cries for help. Most of all, goodbye, and thank you, to those of you who have challenged me to think differently about the problem of suicide. Those of you who have helped me see through romantic notions of self-deliverance and "peace" (read: decomposition) that this pro-suicide hellhole promises, the lies that have been woven into it from its inception. Let's not call this place pro-choice. The users may be, but there is absolutely nothing about the design and administration of this website that does not explicitly encourage suicide, either actively or by passive culture-making. Ban me for this, I am already gone. But better, leave it up, if indeed you are "pro-choice." Leave it up so that my friends here can understand why I am offline, out somewhere in the world not navel-gazing but fighting for my fucking life. Leave it up for them.

I understand what you mean, my own interactions on this site are very limited compared to others.

Since I have so far found it impossible to hurt myself, much less kill myself, I view this place differently than others.

There are plenty of threads on this site dedicated to methods to end your life. I am usually least interested in them.

I read posts where people talk about their emotions and the sadness that accompanies them in their lives. And continue living with it.

There's something to be said about sadness being part of some people's lives especially sadness that they can never overcome till the end.

I view this place not as "Sanctioned Suicide" but as "Sanctioned Sadness".

I hope you find your place in life.

I must say your transformation sounds remarkable and if you manage to turn around your life in few months I would be interested to hear how you are doing.

 

[peanuts]

I've spent years on "pro-anorexia" forums, which - contrasted to the pro-ana community of the 2000s - are actually now pro-choice. Pro-choice - an acceptance that people are going to continue engaging in their behaviours, acceptance that not everyone wants to recover, acceptance that many people will remain emaciated for ever/never weight restore, and an acceptance of harm-reduction as opposed to recovery.

Most importantly accepting that you cannot save strangers on the internet by telling them life gets better, or that they shouldn't do it.

This site is not a pro-suicide hellhole, it's actually a lifeline. While harm reduction in eating disorders relates to safe purging, harm-reduction on here is more about avoiding life-long brain injury and avoiding accidental death.