Help Leaving my Boyfriend

[LostLittleWolf]

Sigh sorry my first post here is about something like this, a big part of my depression right now is my current boyfriend of three years. He's mentally abused me for most of the time we've been together and has isolated me from all of my friends as well as most of my family the only exception being my mother father and brother. We had a daughter together last year and i've been reaching my breaking point with him. I'm tired of him being racist, selling drugs, and doing drugs. I'm just so scared to leave because he's talked about hurting himself or worse if i leave and my ex husband actually pulled a gun out on me when i left so i'm scared he'll do the same. He has gang connections and a friend who makes bombs for fun too so I'm extremely worried about him getting that friend to make some to come after my family with. I do have a safe place to go if i leave, he'd never guess I went there but does anyone have any advice on how to prepare for the worst? I know cops are an obvious but i've had cops fail to help me in the past with SA so i'm hesitant to reach out to them for help. I also know getting a gun of my own would be a good idea but i dont know if i can since i have a record of depression/anxiety stretching back to the age of 5. I just want to do what's best for my daughter, she's honestly the only reason i'm still going.
Thank you all for being such a caring community i really appreciate any input and if anyone else is going through something similar feel free to dm me and we can vent or talk

 

[cgrtt.brns]

im so sorry you're going through this, it sounds terrifying. i don't have any advice that i think would be helpful, other than maybe getting a restraining order? idk if that's what you meant by getting the cops involved. you're incredibly brave for doing what you can for you and your daughter, i really hope everything works out for you two and that you stay safe. <3

 

[LostLittleWolf]

im so sorry you're going through this, it sounds terrifying. i don't have any advice that i think would be helpful, other than maybe getting a restraining order? idk if that's what you meant by getting the cops involved. you're incredibly brave for doing what you can for you and your daughter, i really hope everything works out for you two and that you stay safe. <3

Yeah I thought about that as well but with it being only on paper i'd be worried he'd just go after my parents, i'd like to think he wouldn't hurt them but anxiety is turning my gut.
I thought about a protection program as well but then i'd have to cut contact with my parents and brother and i'd rather not because my brother is terminally ill.
I appreciate you commenting though and I promise to try and be as safe and careful as possible doing this. <3