Discussion Known anyone who has killed themselves?

[Apathy's Girl]

My best friend jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge. I know one women who shot herself during a bout of depression, another who shot herself due to a debilitating illness, two guys who shot themselves during bad breakups. One friend was bullied because she was trans, she hung herself. There are others that I used to correspond with on alt.sucide.holiday but I didn't know them in real life.

 

[goodbyebunny]

Not that I'm aware of.

 

[suicidesheep31]

One of my friend ODed with pills.
The father of my ex-boyfriend hang himself after letting a letter in our box mail. It was too late when we found him.
One of my uncle partially hang himself in his car.
One of my ant crashed her car after an issue with her son and husband.
During a training in a college, one girl made an attempt by jumping from the 5th. I don't know if she is dead but I know that she was in coma months later.

 

[k75]

One of my high school boyfriends shot himself a few years ago. The circumstances were really sad. I feel a lot of guilt, because we were still close when we drifted apart. I thought about reconnecting with him for years and really wanted to, but it was just one of those things that never ended up happening. I just kind of figured there was always time later. Now, I really wish I had. I don't think it would have changed what happened, but it still haunts me.

Also my aunt and her boyfriend, but my family doesn't believe they did. There were suspicious circumstances.

 

[iHateMyselflokay]

Yes, my ex killed himself after we broke up

For me the pain is tenfold because of the fact that I broke up with my ex first but came back a month later and we tried again but I rushed things and her feelings weren't the same. Idk how to ever forgive myself for breaking up with her first. It's not just being dumped by my ex but knowing it's my fault and to add I am blocked on everything with no way to contact her. It is my fault and that is why I hate myself. I will never love again including myself

 

[losthope123]

I know a guy who killed himself because he didn't get into an Ivy-League school. To make a long story short, he had been pushed his whole life to be highly-successful. I think that when he had to settle for a state school he must have felt like a complete failure. They found him in his room dead as a result. It was really sad because he had amazing potential and was very popular when I knew him back in high-school.

 

[LongNight]

My son, last year. He was 12 and I have thought about it everyday since. I used to love life, but a big part of who I was died with him. I hardly have the will to do anything. Sometimes I stay in his bed for days. Every day is a day closer to being with him. I just want to die peacefully and I know that is a hard to accomplish.

I am so sorry. That's just unimaginable.

 

[Worndown]

My 2 best friends. We lived together, moved around the state together, were homeless together. We were the 3 amigos, ed edd and eddy (I was double d). We eventually split to do our own things

V died after he robbed my parents, after all they did for him. I was furious, called him up and told him he'd never get better, that he should just kill himself, knowing that he was suicidal. And he did, ODed on a massive amount of fentanyl

J died in prison. He had gotten addicted to meth and heroin real bad, lost his kid, and was homeless. I tried to get him to come down and live with me but he wouldn't. He was suicidal but nothing worked, from gram shots of H to shooting bleach. I sent him a song that I knew he'd relate to, one that I couldn't get out of my head because it sounded like he wrote it (Forever Close My Eyes by Dalek) but it was about suicide and I knew it'd push him over the edge. After I sent him that he responded with some ominous shit, then the next day he told me about this guy he was gonna rob who was pimping out these underage girls, although I knew it was a way for him to go out in a blaze of glory doing something decent. When he got there with the man he was with (who told me about this) there were some of the girls there unexpectedly. The guy started shooting at J so he shot back and accidentally hit one of the girls. She's okay, just grazed, but still got shot. J went to jail and hung himself after being raped in there

So yeah. I'm basically responsible for the death of my 2 best friends

You might note that your friends worked very hard to get into a situation where you could in some way contribute to their death. I would say their poor life choices were the contributing factors. You can feel bad over the loss, but do not feel responsible.

my ex boyfriend.

he killed himself this year, and was found dead the day before I was meant to stand in court against him for a horrible, traumatising crime he committed against me.

just over a week ago I found his profile on SS by accident. today it shows on the members page as his 21st birthday.

if it were not for me, he would not be dead.

"Horrible traumatising crime" might have played a role. That was not your fault.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

A good friend of mine died from suicide shortly after we had both graduated high school and started our adult lives. She never told a soul how much she was hurting, she'd always try to cheer you up and send you the funniest things she could find. Her last communication with the world was a social media post about how scared she was, then she was found the next day. I miss her very much and I still think about her quite often.

 

[Worndown]

When I was 14 a classmate removed herself from our lives with a shotgun. For the next four years our bus drove past her house.
We all have choices to make. Unless we took overt action to cause their demise, you need to have a very philosophical view on the life and death of others. If you remember them and miss them, a little piece of them will live as long as you.

 

[GravityUtilizer]

As a bartender I served a regular his regular drink on the day he attempted. He sure looked glum that day. Anyway later on (presumably drunk) he lay down onto train tracks and waited to meet his maker. He survived, however, and lost his legs.

I also turned down a job offer of a bar manager who caught the bus by 'walking into the sea' a couple of weeks after the interview.

 

[Anon123]

Ive lost two friends to sucide. One of them was whilst she was sectioned in inpatient and "supposed" to be on constant observation. The other the family wont accept it was suicide and say the mental health services pushed her to do it so they are at war with them. Heard about many local suicides. One been new years eve. There is a feild just behind my house and a guy used the dog lead to hang himself on a little bridge. I knew some of his relatives but not him.

My son, last year. He was 12 and I have thought about it everyday since. I used to love life, but a big part of who I was died with him. I hardly have the will to do anything. Sometimes I stay in his bed for days. Every day is a day closer to being with him. I just want to die peacefully and I know that is a hard to accomplish.

Sending lots of love and hugs. Cant imagine the immence pain u go through on a daily basis xxxxx

 

[justsad&done]

My boyfriend of 7 years, we where actually engaged I just hate the word fiancé. I was the one struggling with mental illness and he supported me nobody had any idea what he was going through it was totally out of the blue...I suppose that what made my urge to do it even more

...I think we are in a similar place...my fiance as well...

My son, last year. He was 12 and I have thought about it everyday since. I used to love life, but a big part of who I was died with him. I hardly have the will to do anything. Sometimes I stay in his bed for days. Every day is a day closer to being with him. I just want to die peacefully and I know that is a hard to accomplish.

I am so so sorry. I have children - one who has been suicidal for years - and my fiance killed himself. My heart goes out to you and I send you hugs...I truly am sorry for all you are going through...:(

 

[LUNANYX]

My friend from Middle School.
We were in the 6th grade. She hung herself because her parents kept making fun of her weight.
The morning after had to be one of the saddest days I've had at school when I was 12. All students and teachers cried that day. I had 6th period with her and the classroom was just in shambles.

 

[PDAnnie2610]

Yes. 3 of my friends, one of whom was a best/close mate.

 

[killbob]

One of my friends was a severe alcoholic and decided to end it by putting a 12 gauge in his mouth with 00 buck in the chamber and a screwdriver through the trigger so he could trigger it with his feet.

Another friend who was part of the Lufthansa heist at JFK died in an apparent suicide / accidental drowning around the time the bodies started showing up decades later. Of course he was wearing a suit, his hands were tied behind his back, and he was weighted down when he decided to go swimming in the East River. I'm a little skeptical, especially since he called me the week before and told me he was scared the feds and former associates were closing in and wanted me to help him disappear.

 

[Szs33]

Yes, a teacher of mine.

 

[WornOutLife]

Yes, some people I used to talk to here on SS and one high school classmate

 

[Gerard de Nerval]

The first one was a friend in college who jumped from a parking garage about 6 years ago. This was a small conservatory so it affected many of us, a catalyst for others to attempt.
Then last year, my partner (we were separated) jumped from a bridge. Honestly I am still shocked I'm still around after that happened. I made two attempts already but failed both, much to the shock amongst my close friends. But really it shouldn't be so shocking considering what happened.

 

[Cherrypea]

Do I really sound proud of it? Jesus christ that's the worst shit I've ever done, it haunts me constantly. I killed my best goddamn friends in the entire world! Proud. Wow. Fuck. I'm sorry I came off that way, that must've felt really shitty to read thinking I was proud of that. The thought makes me sick to my stomach tbh. Anyways, I don't see it, but I guess if that's how it comes across I'll delete the post. Sorry
*edit* so the forum isn't letting me delete that, guess it's just gonna stay up there. Fucking hell

I don't think you sounded proud of it and none of it seems like your fault.

 

[RedPanda]

Yes, female friend that hung herself in the garage at home.

I also suspect my cousin killed himself but my aunt does not want to tell us the truth.

Oh and myself, I also killed myself in the near future.

 

[CursedForDisaster]

Yeah, he sexually assaulted my girlfriend so I hated him but then my girlfriend and I saw him one day and he insisted on giving her a hug (they used to be friends in the past) and a few days later he killed himself because of other relationship issues. Now I realize he was just going through a lot of shit too but he bottled it up very well.

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

Multiple.

 

[wordsonscreen]

My first crush.
A friend's father- but I did not know him. I watched my friend go through grief though and it changed him forever...

 

[LadyAlastor]

Tarot cards cause the very thing they warn about. They tell you what they are going to do to you.

That's the exact reason why I've been avoiding my tarot cards as a blood witch with a lot of the things that have been happening I can just avoiding s*** and I'm I know it's inevitable but I'm going to very much kill myself pretty soon I can feel it

 

[user667]

no, but someone im very close to had a father, brother and ex boyfriend all commit suicide. i feel awful that i'm leaving her too but i have to

 

[the_final_countdown]

In college, the student above my dormitory jumped to his death. Was only four stories high but it killed him.

 

[Yiyo123]

My grandmother... i never knew her and a highschool friend. He was unspected (great career, wife and kids, comfortable life...). In this last case, that's why I say money helps but it can't buy happiness and joy.

I'm so sorry for everyone here that have experience losing someone (loved one or not).

 

[wordsonscreen]

That's the exact reason why I've been avoiding my tarot cards as a blood witch with a lot of the things that have been happening I can just avoiding s*** and I'm I know it's inevitable but I'm going to very much kill myself pretty soon I can feel it

We should talk!!!! <3
I do tarot and my readings have (unfortunately) never been wrong- to a point that I am terrified to read anymore. I am afraid to see what they will tell me. I have two other friends who have read for me and their readings were literally SO on point.

I've personally known quite a few people who have killed themselves. There was a work colleague who hanged himself in our workplace. The strange thing about his suicide is that before it happened he wanted me to read the Tarot for him. I asked him to draw just one card. The card he drew unnerved me considerably because it was the Ace of Swords reversed which I felt had a self-destructive meaning. It was like a Roman impaling himself on his own sword in self-defeat. The funny thing about it all is that I didn't even reveal the Tarot card to him nor the self-destructIve meaning I ascribed to it. There was no way I could have cued him to kill himself because I told him he should be more confident.

I do tarot as well!! I'd love to learn more about you :)

 

[booray]

Two of my cousins killed themselves, one with pills and another with CO. They were much younger than me and I wasn't close to either of them, but I know that both had unresolved psychological issues. One of them had accidentally killed someone and never forgave himself for it. It's looking like I'll be the next cousin to ctb. I know that my extended family will be in shock because they will be thinking that my generation is cursed, and maybe it is.