I've Sever My Bonds With 3 of My Friends; I truly am Alone

[The Call of The Void]

This week, I had to cut ties with 3 of my friends. The first one, (I'll be using just the first letter of their names) B, was my friend and high school crush. I got rid of her because I still had feelings for her, and also because she lied to me. She turned me down because she says she won't date her male friends, yet a couple months ago I found out she's going out with her male best friend. I really did like her, and because I cared for her, I had to let her go. However, I was too much of a coward to write in English, so I sent in Japanese. I have no idea why I did that. I know it was selfish, but I just couldn't do it anymore.

The second one, K, was hard to let go. We would always have good conversations, but unfortunately, he would take days, sometimes even weeks to reply back to me. It was OK the first couple of times, but it's been going on much more this year, and frankly, I got tired of it. Not to mention, I was on the phone with him yesterday, and you know what he did? He ignored me for about 30 minutes while he was playing video games with his other friend. I just hanged up.

Now the third friend, J, was even harder to let go. We met in a psych ward in 2017. We always talked, and he said I was like a brother to him. Unfortunately, these last couple of weeks, he would do the same thing as K, not replying to my messages for days or weeks. Not only that, but he post poned visiting me again. This is about the third time. I know it's his car, but jeez, how many times has this happened? I'm honestly just waiting until his car turns into a Transformer at this point.

So I blocked all 3 of them. They have all showed time and time again that they're not willing to put in the effort into being a good friend. So why should I? Plus, I can't tell you how many times I've messaged them while they were active on Messenger. I know I'm being selfish, but they were making me more suicidal. Now I'm even more alone now. I hope when I do commit suicide, that my remaining friends will remember me, because the others sure won't.

 

[who doesn't matter]

This week, I had to cut ties with 3 of my friends. The first one, (I'll be using just the first letter of their names) B, was my friend and high school crush. I got rid of her because I still had feelings for her, and also because she lied to me. She turned me down because she says she won't date her male friends, yet a couple months ago I found out she's going out with her male best friend. I really did like her, and because I cared for her, I had to let her go. However, I was too much of a coward to write in English, so I sent in Japanese. I have no idea why I did that. I know it was selfish, but I just couldn't do it anymore.

The second one, K, was hard to let go. We would always have good conversations, but unfortunately, he would take days, sometimes even weeks to reply back to me. It was OK the first couple of times, but it's been going on much more this year, and frankly, I got tired of it. Not to mention, I was on the phone with him yesterday, and you know what he did? He ignored me for about 30 minutes while he was playing video games with his other friend. I just hanged up.

Now the third friend, J, was even harder to let go. We met in a psych ward in 2017. We always talked, and he said I was like a brother to him. Unfortunately, these last couple of weeks, he would do the same thing as K, not replying to my messages for days or weeks. Not only that, but he post poned visiting me again. This is about the third time. I know it's his car, but jeez, how many times has this happened? I'm honestly just waiting until his car turns into a Transformer at this point.

So I blocked all 3 of them. They have all showed time and time again that they're not willing to put in the effort into being a good friend. So why should I? Plus, I can't tell you how many times I've messaged them while they were active on Messenger. I know I'm being selfish, but they were making me more suicidal. Now I'm even more alone now. I hope when I do commit suicide, that my remaining friends will remember me, because the others sure won't.

There is a waiting period or say, cooldown period between ridding off something unnecessary and gaining something better. You are in that period. Allow things to settle down a bit. Relax yourself (I know it sounds dumb but still).

 

[FriendofDeath]

That's a tough thing to do, because we always hope something changes, however we know in our hearts we deserve something more, so we make that difficult decision. I asked someone point blank if we were friends anymore. I guess she couldn't deal with me after my loss. I was the one putting all the energy into a relationship I didn't want to let go. It isn't fun, but I agree with Vinay4853 - something better can come along. It sounds like you've outgrown those other individuals.

 

[DatSpecialKindOfCrzy]

It's nice to finally see someone who has the balls to cut people off for their own protection. The second dude was a prick. Taking days to reply is one thing, but ignoring you on the phone is a whole other thing... while playing video games for that matter. But as for the third guy, please check in him first. I do this thing where I ignore messages and decline phone calls (sometimes I even go off the grid for weeks without warning only to come back to scoldings from friends and family because they were worried about me) because I'm dealing with mental issues and need space from everything. So please check on the third guy before truly disconnecting from him

 

[The Call of The Void]

There is a waiting period or say, cooldown period between ridding off something unnecessary and gaining something better. You are in that period. Allow things to settle down a bit. Relax yourself (I know it sounds dumb but still).

Thank you. I'm still learning.

It's nice to finally see someone who has the balls to cut people off for their own protection. The second dude was a prick. Taking days to reply is one thing, but ignoring you on the phone is a whole other thing... while playing video games for that matter. But as for the third guy, please check in him first. I do this thing where I ignore messages and decline phone calls (sometimes I even go off the grid for weeks without warning only to come back to scoldings from friends and family because they were worried about me) because I'm dealing with mental issues and need space from everything. So please check on the third guy before truly disconnecting from him

All right. This sounds like good advice.

 

[The Call of The Void]

There is a waiting period or say, cooldown period between ridding off something unnecessary and gaining something better. You are in that period. Allow things to settle down a bit. Relax yourself (I know it sounds dumb but still).

Yeah. I'm going to wait it out with my other friends. I don't think it's wise to cut everyone entirely off. There are still some who still actually care.

That's a tough thing to do, because we always hope something changes, however we know in our hearts we deserve something more, so we make that difficult decision. I asked someone point blank if we were friends anymore. I guess she couldn't deal with me after my loss. I was the one putting all the energy into a relationship I didn't want to let go. It isn't fun, but I agree with Vinay4853 - something better can come along. It sounds like you've outgrown those other individuals.

Yeah, I guess it had to be done. I hope you find better friends.